Category Archives: 21

21

Suffering

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There are two sides to every coin, and in my life, I have found joy on one side and suffering on the other. The pain appears as the worst of things to experience in life and should be avoided at all costs.

Although I agree it is something that is not pleasant, it provides a necessary function for people. I wish things were always easy, and there was nothing but joy in my experience, but life offers difficult obstacles for each of us to overcome. How we think about our experience will bring us suffering or lessons. Pain is a choice of how we feel about each situation we are in life. It is a natural and inevitable part of life. We will have catastrophic loss and sadness in our lives. How we deal with it will define much of who we are and how successfully we live our lives. Your suffering is a choice and one I have made all too often.

Crutches of Life

Crutches are everywhere in life. These are things in our experience that limit us in one way or another. Some fall prey to wild pleasures and excesses in life, which distract you from your purpose and determine what can be accomplished. Others find jobs that are just enough above water to be acceptable but will never allow you to grow into the person you could be. All crutches of the world we adopt to “help” get us through life will cause suffering and move us further from ourselves. Life can seem like a prison if we let it. Keeping us confined to a particular place and set of circumstances. This limit is only the case if you choose to allow it. Or you can choose to be free in your actions and your mind.

Limiting my options is a game I played from early on. Allowing others to put their labels on me and the corresponding limits from the earliest moments in life. “You just aren’t athletic.” “That’s nice, but you will never make a living from it.” “You just aren’t very book smart.” Or one of a million other limiting statements I accepted as crutches and eventually even stopped questioning. Any belief that I have allowed to limit me in any way needed to be reevaluated and changed, even in a small way, because these are the chains that life has put on you, and you won’t eliminate the suffering they cause until you change them.

This reaction is a choice, and it isn’t as difficult as most would have you believe. Change is a constant and inevitable part of life, and you can fight against it or learn to choose to move with it. Ending this limiting suffering is a race between your mental capacities and your biological limitations. Some will win, and some will not. Which side will you be on?

Becoming Your True Self

All people are born with a purpose in life. All of those intentions are positive, and there is some message to bring or a goal to accomplish before our time is done. Unfortunately, we are almost immediately piled with expectations and experiences that push us further from that mission. The programming we receive is mainly in the name of love but delivered in the voice of fear. Parents generally want the best for their children, but often their idea of precisely what the “Best” means can make your choices seem “worst,” even if you are following your heart. Chasing your dreams is your life; nobody else’s.

The suffering that this can cause is lifelong and painful. With each step, a person takes in the direction of someone else’s expectations the further they get from their true self, and soon that person you were born is hidden behind a lot of trees and weeds. It can be challenging to find your way back. The further you have moved from your true essence, the higher the suffering is going to be. It seems like the journey back to who you are is never too far to reach or too late to start looking. The limits we accept are the ones that will affect us. So begin today looking for what message you were born to send and what gift you have to give.

Loss and Suffering

To live life and love others opens you up for the loss, which leads to suffering. If you have lost someone close to you, you know this kind of pain is a painful experience nobody wants to have. But life is a tenuous experience with no guarantees. We never know when the ride will be over should. It is easy to get lost in the routines of the days and take things for granted. Each day is a gift. Open it! Be motivated to do what you want to do, be with those that make you happy, and enjoy every moment.

Not only are the days a gift, but you should take the time to look at the beauty of your day. All the people in our lives are precious too. It is human nature to take things for granted, only realizing how consequential or special someone was when they had left us. Then we mourn the loss. Which is natural, but there is an opportunity every day to celebrate all those in your life, contributing to the experience of living life. It is a short ride, this life, and it makes no sense to spend the bulk of it in misery when you don’t have to. Spend it in appreciation of the magic that is you and your unique presence.

Emotional Rescue

We will all have emotions that bring us down. Anger and fear are natural reactions to life when you start to look at things from the perspective of, “What am I getting out of this?” Then you have to learn to deal with it and either let it consume you or change your thoughts, emotions, and actions to something more positive. I know it sounds natural, and when you feel anger or fear, it isn’t too easy to change. But YOU can modify it by looking at the thoughts causing your suffering and changing them to something else.

Find something or someone who brings out the positive in you. It seems like much of our suffering comes from our feelings of inadequacy, and to change means doing something more worthwhile. Learn what your emotions are telling you and how to change them from negative to positive for you, and you will find a tool to help you end some daily pain nobody needs to deal with in life.

Suffering is a message in life that we are attached to something temporary in a permanent way. Nothing in life is stable, and that is what makes it unique. So the choice is up to you in the end as it always is, spend your time suffering or spend your time in joy. It is all up to you.

“Suffering becomes beautiful when anyone bears great calamities with cheerfulness, not through insensibility but the greatness of mind.” Aristotle

“The reward of suffering is experience.” –Harry S Truman

“Suffering by nature or chance never seems so painful as suffering inflicted on us by the arbitrary will of another.”- Arthur Schopenhauer

“Suffering is but another name for the teaching of experience, which is the parent of instruction and the schoolmaster of life.” Horace

“Suffering is the substance of life and the root of personality, for it is only suffering that makes us persons.” – Miguel de Unamuno

 

 

21

Determined

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Determination-firmness of purpose; resoluteness.

People set out on many journeys in life. Our determination dictates how far the trip is going to take us. All start with calm confidence. All are going to face challenges that will help decide the direction a journey is going to take. Sometimes things get tough, and you can’t continue. The bottom line is that when it comes to your goals and dreams, the determination you carry in your heart is the number one factor in reaching a successful conclusion or not. Resolution is a quality in each of us, and it needs to be used to be effective. It all starts with looking at our thoughts, words, and actions when it comes to completing our goals and seeing the determination we have inside.

Becoming Determined

It takes courage to live a different life that is defined by your personality. Other people will want to push you in different directions that benefit them. You are determined to achieve or become something that will keep you focused on your road ahead and what you need to do to reach your goals. The spring of determination comes from courage. Being brave enough to say no to the things that deter our progress, and yes to the experiences that propel us forward.

Determination is the wake-up call to our humanity. There are experiences we want to have. Usually, these are things we want to accomplish, and we will never accomplish anything until we start in some way, small or big. We are determined to reach a goal or create a dream that pushes us down the road toward the result we seek. Our human soul celebrates and thrives when it has a purpose, a drive, to follow. We can decide which mountains we want to conquer and experience. Without determination, we will never reach the top.

Beliefs Build Determination

When you are trying to accomplish anything to keep your determination moving you in the right direction, you have to feel that you can achieve whatever you are setting out to do. You may think you want to be the best singer in the world, but if deep down you don’t believe that you can, it isn’t going to happen. If you have a belief inside of you that you can become a great singer, then you will have a much stronger determination to accomplish this goal. Whatever you dream of doing, check your beliefs first and see if it resonates with you. Believe you can or change that belief into one that supports your effort.

Beliefs give us the resolve to take action toward making something a reality. They will allow you to establish a neural pattern toward your goals. It will keep you taking steps to let your determination lead to success. You will stay resolute in continuing to practice, work out, learn, or grow in whatever way you need to, to do what you want to do. “If you think you can do a thing or think you can‘t do a thing, you‘re right.” A quote by Henry Ford says it better than I ever could. Believing in yourself and your abilities allows determination in action.

Just Keep Going

When you feel like you have to stop, don’t. When it gets hard, keep going. That is easy to say and hard to do, but that is what determination allows you to do. Find the strength inside of you to keep ongoing. It is through faith in yourself and the promised reward of what your goal is. The determination can be cultivated in anyone, beginning with a focus on the thoughts you entertain, which lead to your beliefs, the words you speak to others, and the actions you will take to get where you want to go. The great thing is that you can become whatever you want if you keep your determination to become whatever you wish.

“Never go backward. Attempt, and do it with all your might. Determination is power” – Charles Simmons

“Do not underestimate the determination of a quiet man” – Iain Duncan Smith

“The price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and the determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand. “

 

 

 

21

Inner Calm

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In any 24 hours, if you venture out into the world, there will be challenges you will face. The battleground for most of these things is going to be in our heads. I often face challenges to maintain a positive attitude or not to be overwhelmed by a poor perspective of things. Anger is an emotion designed as a warning for us. To make sure we know when something isn’t right, or more precisely, that you are afraid. Afraid that your needs aren’t going to be met by a loss of one form or another. Most often, anger is a waste of time. Moving beyond unhealthy emotions of anger, judgment, greed, or cruelty smoothly, quickly, and healthily can make your life a much more pleasant experience. One of the best things we can do is to create a positive space in our mind; it is a skill that anyone can master if they want to.

Be a Reader, Not a Reactor to Thoughts

Thoughts are occurring in our minds at a rapid pace all day long. You have a choice of which ones you listen to and which ones you let pass you by. It is good practice to start to pay attention to the thoughts you allow to affect you positively and negatively. As humans, we are capable of keeping only one thing in our focus at a time. If you choose to focus on a negative, that will trigger negative emotional responses physically in your body. Once you start to drop down a negative chute of thought, it will focus on itself.

Read the negative thought and notice it, and then let it go and choose a more positive view to focus on. Once accomplished, your body will react, and you will move down a more positive chute. Thoughts build on each other, and a focus develops. Read your thoughts and know where they are taking you. The alternative is to let your dreams run wild and spend your time merely reacting at the mercy of whatever your mind creates. That is how many people live their lives. It leads to wild swings or emotions and unpredictable behavior. Focus on your thoughts and dismiss those that aren’t an accurate representation of who you are and who you want to be. Let them slide by you like flies in the darkness.

Real Focus Develops

One of the best methods to develop a focus on positive thoughts is meditation. Most people picture incense, candles, and chanting when they think of meditating, but that is just a stereotype. Many people practice meditation without knowing it. Whenever you calm your mind and notice your thoughts, you are contemplating. It can be through intense concentration on a task or a conscious effort to notice your breathing. There is a calmness that will take over your mind and body if you stop the mind from running wild and focus on something other than your thought. Thoughts then come to you but are very noticeable as something outside of you.

The peaceful calm that will move over you when you seek calmness will allow you to look deep inside yourself and get to know your true self. Some say that is where your real power exists. Once the thoughts are quiet, a real focus can develop on what you want in your life and what you don’t. Clear goals can materialize, and actual plans for achieving them come into your reality. Focus on the calmness of mediation and see what you can accomplish.

Calmness is a power

There is an ability to bring your inner strength to bear against any challenge you will face the ability to calm your mind at will allows those without this asset to can’t. Inside us all, there is a strength hidden most of the time but can be channeled and used to enable you to thrive and survive when it seems doubtful. Much of our suffering occurs because we desire things to come to us a certain way. Without it, we are in trouble.

But there is the self-confidence that we develop, left to our own devices as children we have it, but time, experience, and the will of others push it down deep. Challenges come in life as a chance to bring them out. Sometimes we fail, are overwhelmed, and never get there. But ………sometimes we do not fail, and we remember the fact that we are strong enough t0 handle what life is throwing our way. Whatever that is, addiction, poverty, or loss. Inside of us is the strength to take it. Finding that strength is helped by developing a calmness about you.

Focus on methods to see the tone and tenor of your thoughts. Look for the ones that make your life a better experience and leave the negative behind. Learning to focus your mind and see what it is doing can allow you to find success and overcome any challenge you face.

“Calm mind brings inner strength and self-confidence, so that’s very important for good health.” -Dalai Lama

“Getting stress out of your life takes more than prayer alone. You must take action to make changes and stop doing whatever is causing the stress. You can learn to calm down in the way you handle things.”-Joyce Meyer

“You don’t have to control your thoughts. You have to stop letting them control you.”-Dan Millman

 

21

Lessons of Pain

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Few teachers in my life haveledarning is a gift gotten my attention and held on to it quite like pain. When you are in pain, there is no escaping the message. Pain is a neurological phenomenon that is vital to let us know something is wrong. It could be physically bad or mentally wrong, but either way, pain lets you know that something must change. Without exception, the pain ahas changed me with each visit it has made to my life.

Pain is Temporary; Learning is Forever

Rarely is the anxiety a permanent condition; more often than not, it is a temporary warning sign that something is not quite right. There may be some cases where arrow painchronic pain persists; fortunately, I have never experienced this. Physical pain exists when you hurt your body somehow, and although unpleasant, we can heal it with time, therapy, and treatment. The presence of physical pain has caused you to change your outlook on life and your daily physical activities. This is true of a broken bone or a heart attack. The pain will change you permanently and force you to look for solutions to end it as quickly as possible forever.

Emotional or spiritual pain is something else. It is caused by the experiences we have and how they are registered in the mind. All people have felt heartbreak to some degree or another. It is a mental condition
that causes pain inside your emotional heart. This pain is calling out to be dealt with, but often it is too intense to handle appropriately. Many try to medicate themselves through drugs and alcohol, but when the effect wears off, the pain is still there, seeking to be dealt with in a loving and caring manner. The scars that we leave behind are often major signposts in our lives and dictate our future experiences.

It becomes the fear of the pain, even more than the pain, that dictates our actions to self-medicate or behave poorly to others. Hiding from the pain or preemptively eliminating the opportunity for the pain to affect us. Once fear is faced, it will lose its power over us.

This type of pain has, at times, led to many defining moments in my life. From overcoming monumental losses of love. To appreciate the caring and kindness that others display in their dealings with people. If life went along without pain as a teacher, many experiences wouldn’t carry the message.

The value of relationships might be to understand when they are right and to appreciate those moments. We are not guaranteed anything in life, only the moment we are currently experiencing. Pain allows us to live in this moment and focus on the experience we are in right now. Understanding that it will pass and that you have just taken a vital, although painful step, down the road to wisdom, understanding, and, of course, growth.

buddha-quotes-about-life-buddha-quotes-quotes-pictures-quotes-pictures-updated-daily-34593tumblr_mm72n2XIkL1s9u3jeo1_500Sometimes pain can seem like a friend to some. It allows them to know that they are still alive and can feel. If the loss of any relationship is bothering you, pain can always be the sure connection to the one who has been lost.

I have carried the pain further than I had to to keep the connection. In the end, though, the pain taught its lesson and moved on. I had learned, changed, and in most cases, grown as an individual with a capacity to love more for going through it. Although, as I would also tell you, I wouldn’t recommend the entire experience to anyone. Although pain is a proficient educator, the methodology leaves a lot to be desired.

“Sit with the pain until it passes, and you will be calmer for the next one.”   Naval Ravikant

“Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing.”-   Fight Club

“Adversity is the first path to truth.”-  Lord Byron

“One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: that word is love.” –  Sophocles

21

My Education

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Education is the process of receiving or giving systematic instruction, especially at a school or university, an enlightening experience.

It is the goal of most people to get an excellent education to reap the highest financial benefit for them during their life. Getting an education is powerful because the more you learn, the more powerful you are in life, and the more you can contribute back to the world. There is a problem with the education one receives today. Although well-meaning, the experience seems useful for those gifted at playing the games of expectation our system puts upon them. But for the majority, education is a minefield of strange expectations and demanding requirements with very little real-world application. It is easy to blame the system; each of us is responsible for the education we get out of life. But that doesn’t have to be the case. When we treat each person like they have potential, all people will rise to that level. Every day is a chance to enhance or diminish it. Start by being conscious of you your thoughts about learning, the emotions those thoughts stir up, the words you use, and the action you take because of those thoughts. That is a rise in consciousness.

All People Have Ability

There are two mindsets in education. One is that each student is either intelligent or not, so they design everything to make intelligent people thrive. The other is the belief that all students have talent and ability and, with the right motivation, and support can achieve anything they want. The keywords are the last three, “anything they want.” This attitude is where the inspiration comes from. That desire comes from becoming more conscious about what you want to learn in life and what you want to do.

There are many online colleges now that have streamlined the system for taking college classes and earning degrees. All of these programs have some merit because increasing your base of knowledge is a good thing. But you don’t need to go into debt to gain the most experience. Desire and read a book to do it. Or start doing the thing you want to do. All people can run their education and should. I know a degree can be a sign of accomplishment and mastery of a subject. But my point is all people can learn, and they can start right now this minute.

The Education Process

I think it is essential to look at education as a process and not simply an accomplishment. The method of education starts when you are born and won’t end until you die. It begins with learning the basics of how to best fit into the social situation that we are born into, but eventually, we want to know more. Start with an interest and follow it to see where it leads you. Learn to learn at every opportunity that life gives you. There is no shortage of information.

Once you start to learn independently and develop a love for figuring things out, your mind grows. It will never shrink again unless affected by a disease. The more knowledge you accumulate, the more you want to add. It doesn’t matter how old you are, where you live, or how much money you have. You are capable of learning anything you want unless you are functioning under some limiting belief.

Limiting Beliefs and Education

If you are thinking negative things about yourself, then they will diminish the knowledge you can attain. Our beliefs develop throughout our development. Whatever opinion or thought of your teachers, peers, family, or society in general that resonated with you will lead to a belief in our subconscious. If you were told and believe you will never be any good at math, guess what? You will probably never be good at math. It is the same for everything. These opinions and thoughts that we adopt for whatever reason control our ability to achieve and learn.

The great thing is that we can remove all of these limits with a bit of work and conscious thought. Stereotypes about the abilities of any group of people are incredibly damaging in this way. They don’t have to be, the individual is the driver of their education curriculum, and nobody can stop them. Decide you want to learn, avoid distractions, and get to it.

Real Education

It doesn’t even take reading a book or taking a class to participate in education. It can be happening all around you in situations you face every day. It would help if you were open to expanding your knowledge base to grow and experience an enlightening moment. Be aware of your thoughts about the way people do things that is different from you. Learn about it, grow as a person, and accept that education happens every day. Look at your thoughts about people and things and pay attention to those trying to educate you. Then gage the feelings you have about the ideas and the actions and words that come to you because of that. Education is an experience, not a destination or possession.

“Education is what remains after one has forgotten what one has learned in school.”- Albert Einstein.

“Education is the passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today.”- Malcolm X.

“Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world.”- Nelson Mandela.

 

21

Begin

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beginningBeginnings can be challenging. You aren’t yet privy to all of the nuances that make a job or task work with as little resistance as possible. This experience is true of a new home, a new job, a new relationship, any time you are beginning anything at all! It is true with life. Beginnings are both terrifying and exhilarating, like climbing a mountain. As you take your first tentative steps, it might seem impossible, but with persistence, you can reach any summit.

Most people don’t have someone who can guide them or fill them in on what to expect in this adventure called life. As you go through its stages, there are many experiences you will have to deal with to feel normal. Some tests seem pointless at the moment, but the value is only revealed to you years later. There are many things to learn in life, and one of the most important is who you exactly are. That is the real new beginning. To realize you have a chance to learn everything.

Beginning of Your Education

constant educatonAs you may have figured out, the beginning of your education did not start when you entered kindergarten, and it didn’t end when you graduated from high school, college, grad school, etc. The rudiments of academics were a tool to reward, develop, and learn how to learn. But the joke was on us. The real lessons were not the subjects but the space surrounding them. The people, relationships, and thoughts you were exposed to along the way. These tests are the ones we continue to be faced with throughout our journey.

Life is a consistent educational experience that teaches its lessons with the cold and hard slap of trial and error. We try, we fail, we learn, we plan, we try again. Continually it goes on, and those that are lucky learn quickly, and those who don’t may lag, and the lag can be pretty painful. The great thing is that as long as you are alive, you will always have a chance to catch on and make up for the lost time. Learning is an equal opportunity activity available for any fertile mind. Allow yours to grasp it—no matter what age, you can still learn every day.

Beginning to Accept Ourselves

weaknessGoing along with school and learning, you will find out early and often that a consistent theme in life is making mistakes. How we view mistakes is going to determine what type of learners we are. We can allow them to define us, or see them for what they are, valuable learning experiences. Too many people fear mistakes as a personal indictment of their character and talent. All an error is, especially in an academic setting, is a chance to learn. Learn and reach goals, achieve accomplishments, grow your mind, and experience.

Mistakes are often hard masters that sear their lessons into your existence. It doesn’t take too many hearts wrenching; face slaps of reality to know that some mistakes don’t need to be made more than once. Life will continually flog you with the same mistakes if you are a slow learner until you finally get the lesson. Don’t worry about developing perfection because you will continue to make mistakes your entire life. Not letting yourself be beaten up by mistakes because of someone else’s perception of you, schedule of being, or becoming just plain miserable is the trick to enjoying life. Stand up, dust yourself off, and begin again.

Your Authentic Self

Ecstasy is simply awareness of your authentic selfEvery person is born with authentic talent or skill that belongs exclusively to them. Life appears to be a process where original you are continually covered up and often forgotten by everyone, including you. There are many ways in which this happens; outside of us, people say your authentic self isn’t good enough, is silly, unrealistic, or doesn’t fit into what is acceptable in society. “That’s nice, but you can’t make a living at it.”

The other is on the inside. As we make mistakes and fall short, we let them discourage us and attack our self-esteem. When mistakes happen, we pine away for better decisions in the past rather than learn the lesson and move on. Our authentic selves get buried underneath the harsh evaluation of “I should have done that,” or “I could have done this,” or “I would have gone there.” We pile on the blame to ourselves, and soon we only see our limitations, expecting to fall short. We are less than what we should be. Your authentic self is a talented, unique, and fantastic person. Don’t let the fear of a mistake rob you of giving your gift to the world. Whatever it may be. It is time to begin again and climb that mountain.

You Alone Can Do It

jordan qupteThe good news is that another beginning comes to most people; it is the beginning of searching for that authentic self. It may start as a gentle nudge in your soul; you may feel like things aren’t quite right. Or it may be jarred loose by a tragic event—the idea of who the violent rock slide of events suddenly uncovers you. The death of someone you cared about, the sudden and unexplained ending of a relationship, or the sudden loss of a job can force you to reevaluate where your mental state is. Is this all there is? Maybe a question you start to ask yourself in private.

I have learned that there is no one path to reach this authenticity, no one process, but many avenues that can direct different individuals to their authentic selves. Some know what their true self is all about; others have to keep searching through the rubble of regret and self-criticism until the truth is discovered like gold amid so much dirt and debris. And then begin again and start to climb that mountain all over again.

Yes, it can and will be found. We seem to spend the first half of our lives hiding this treasure, and the second half is spent trying to get back to this unique inner talent and strength that you have. You can only take this journey, some will help you along the way, but in the end, it has to be you that accepts you, your talent, and your responsibility. Then one step at a time, it is time to begin again.

“The closer you stay to emotional authenticity and people, character authenticity, the less you can go wrong. That’s how I feel now, no matter what you’re doing.” – David O. Russell

“There is a certain kind of respect for authenticity today that there wasn’t back in the days when they did ‘Cleopatra,’ where everything looked like a giant motel. People want to have it be authentic in the look and trustworthy in the way people behave.” – John Milius

“Just be what you are and speak from your guts and heart – it’s all a man has.” – Hubert Humphrey

“Hard times arouse an instinctive desire for authenticity.” – Coco Chanel

“We need to find the courage to say NO to the things and people that are not serving us if we want to rediscover ourselves and live our lives with authenticity.” – Barbara de Angelis

“No one man can, for any considerable time, wear one face to himself, and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which is the true one.” – Nathaniel Hawthorne

21

A Meaning

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Lives are spent constructing the person we think we ought to be. We follow advice, thoughts, and ideas taught to us from birth as to what our lives “should” look like and what we “should” do so we will be happy and prosperous. It is not until a little later in life you start to realize you bought a bad bill of goods. Why is this? Because when you do all the things they told you to do and get to the place you “should” be, you find happiness isn’t there.

Life needs to have meaning, and in my opinion, we spend too much time chasing and focusing on the wrong things rather than pursuing ambition and building castles in the air, looking for gratification from the outside. We should be seeking pleasure from the inside, which can only come from putting the acquisition of stuff to the side and searching for something that resonates on the inside. This feeling includes looking for someone else to provide happiness in your life. That is an empty vessel you can carry. It is up to you to determine where your joy comes from in your own life. Start experiencing the things that matter to you on the inside.

Who Are we?

Before you can move your life from one of ambition to one of meaning, you have to understand just what it is that carries meaning for you. It seems like an easy question, but when faced with understanding, there are barriers between you and what gives sense to you. We have been taught many false things about just who we are. We are told that our identity is wrapped around the things we have, the job we do, or what others think of us. When in reality, the opposite of these things is exact.

We are not the things we have. Accumulate all the material things in the world, and you can still feel unfulfilled and empty. Material things can’t fill the holes in our souls. Your job is an activity and not an identity. Too often, the line between our duty and our identity gets blurred, and if we take the responsibility away, we don’t know who we are. Many have gone into severe depression after they lost a job because they were so identified with it. Now it is gone, who exactly are they? You are not your job.

What others think of us can be a significant factor in the actions of many. We are programmed from birth to want to be accepted, be held up on a pedestal, and be singled out in the minds of others. The only thoughts that matter is the ones we have about ourselves. If something means a lot to you, that is all that matters. What others think is none of our business. You can never be true to yourself if you are worried about how others will view it. You are not what others think of you. That goes for those we love as well. Although we hope their opinions will be positive and supportive.

Finding Meaning

It is my experience that life lacks meaning unless it is serving an end beyond itself. This idea is challenging for our programming to comprehend. Unless what we seek has value to that outside of us, then it isn’t easy to find happiness within. Could it be as simple as looking for things that are outside of our selfish desires? We are all connected whether we like it or not. The true meaning seems to be a two-way street with the traffic of what we give and getting equal movement.

We give what we have to give to those outside of us, and we are open receivers for the things they have to send back to us. I don’t think it is productive to think you know it all because there is no way you could. Give what you can and be open to receiving from someone else. There is no better way to create a vibrant life of constant growth, caring, and happiness which will result.

Look for the things you can give to others today, not in the physical realm but in the spiritual and mental world. Kind thoughts, supportive words, understanding, and acceptance. See what you have the capacity to receive as well. Let the two-way street run clear in your life.

There will be times in life when you feel overwhelmed, confused, down, disheartened, and disregarded. Know experience is supporting you and bringing great good your way if you are open to receiving it. Sometimes we spend so much time staring at a door that was closed for us. We never see another available right behind us, behind which everything we desire is waiting. All we have to do is be open, understand it, and make an effort to walk through.

I encourage us all to take the time and look for meaning in the things we are experiencing. Try to take the view that the long game of life will be an enjoyable experience ultimately and provide you with the joy you are seeking. But you have to do your part and know what that looks like.

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”

“In some way, suffering ceases to be suffering at the moment it finds a meaning, such as the meaning of a sacrifice.”

“At such a moment, it is not the physical pain which hurts the most (and this applies to adults as much as to punished children); it is the mental agony caused by the injustice, the unreasonableness of it all.”

 

21

A Purpose

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Change Improvement Development Adjust Transform Concept

Life is the most valuable thing you have. Even when your emotions bring you down and things are not very enjoyable, you still have an opportunity to allow your most positive ideas to permeate your existence. We all have down days because we are human, and in that existence comes with imperfections as a part of the bargain. But there are some things we can keep in mind which will allow us to make our lives happier and more fulfilling.  It starts with your purpose in life, and whatever that is, you are the expression of that. It is to be better than I was yesterday, mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  Not miles better, but at least 0.01% better.  I am not sure I accomplish this every day, but I try to, and that seems to make a difference. What is your purpose? Where does your daily focus lie?

What’s Your Offer

The people you meet in your life will take on a reflection of your projected emotional attitudes and beliefs.  If you think all people are judgmental, mean, short-sighted, and narrow-minded, then that is what you are going to see in those you meet.  If you believe that people are mostly good and are not in life for purely selfish reasons, have open minds, open hearts, and kindness, then that is what you most often will find. Think about what you are offering the world with your attitude each day, and if you doubt, look at the people they meet, they are mirroring that attitude right back at you.

What you offer the world is going to determine your experience in it. If you are focused on yourself alone, what’s in it for you, and all of your thoughts revolve around you. Then the world is going to be an experience of selfishness. Conversely, suppose you look for what you can give to others in general. In that case, the world is a kind, open place with a seemingly unlimited reservoir of adventure and exciting happenings. This happens because you offer the world your best self and look for what you can contribute, not for what you can take.  Make your best offer to the world every day, even when you don’t feel like it.

Choices  Made

Our lives are a consequence of our decisions from the day we were capable of choice until the day it all ends. When you see something that isn’t quite where you want to be, it is easy to point the finger at this factor or that person, but the truth is the responsibility for it all lies right in the mirror, staring back at you.  Your current employment is a result of your choices, as the future employment you are going to have will be. Your relationships are a result of your preferences as well. If you are angry or hurt, it is your choice to speak of it or bury it underneath.  Things that are hidden underneath never stay there and seem to cause all sorts of problems in life. And life is all about choices.

The best thing is that we always have the option to make a different choice and change the direction of our life at any moment.  If you made one poor choice or ten poor choices, it is time to make a different selection if they are not serving your life.  You don’t have to complete a course on decisions or talk it over with someone else.  Make a different choice, and your life will become something different. Many say it isn’t that simple, but we become attached to our beliefs and thoughts and can’t imagine it is that simple to change. But if you give it a try, look at a choice you have been making, which doesn’t serve you, and choose a different option that will bring you towards being the person you want to be.  See what happens.

Finally

A change in choice will lead to a shift in what you are aware of and personal growth in life.  That shift in awareness can allow you to take a negative situation and see the opportunities it presents.  A job you dislike can propel you toward a career that is fulfilling and powerful. Every problem in life has contained the spark of success that can change everything for the better. We need to look at the issue as a challenge presented to make us better people and raise our awareness of our talents and skills.

As our awareness grows, we move along the path to new happiness levels and toward inner peace.  All of the issues that continually reappear give us another chance to choose a different outcome and put lessons hard-learned into practice.

“When you find your WHY, you don’t hit snooze no more! You find a way to make it happen!”- Eric Thomas

“We all have a purpose in life, and when you find yours, you will recognize it.”- Catherine Pulsifer

“Success demands singleness of purpose.” – Vince Lombardi

“Anything and everything you have experienced has been purposeful; it has brought you to where you are now.”- Lyla Vanzandt

The lessons I have learned through hard times and good times are all encapsulated in this song. One of my all-time favorites. When you dream, dream big…………

 

21

Inside to Out

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 Your inner reality and thoughts determine your outside existence.  

This sounds simple when you look at the idea that the laws of reality can’t provide any contradiction; otherwise, it would be challenging to function because everything would be continually changing.  But a more in-depth look at the law of correspondence shows us that the outer world we experience results from what is happening inside of us.  Our innermost dominant thoughts lead to the reality that we experience every day.  But more importantly, that means that if you can learn to adjust those dominant thoughts on the inside, then you can change what your outer world looks like and even the experience you have a day today.

It all comes down to the invisible power that is connected to the things we think and believe. That means it is all up to you. It’s not the economy, who you know, where you live, your history, or any other exterior factor.  It is all up to you, so the best thing we can do is take responsibility for our lives and situations and get to work, making them into something we would like to see.

Seeking Purpose

Being stuck in a situation we are not happy with can happen to anyone. Even people who appear to be successful on the outside can be unhappy with their current circumstances.  It occurs when you are not following your purpose. It could be because you have made poor decisions in the past. It could even be that you have done exactly what you thought the world wanted you to do.  Having a high-paying job is not going to make you happy automatically.  Your day-to-day actions and their alignment to your purpose will.

Seek your purpose. Everyone has purpose potential, and there is something you were put on this Earth to do. Circumstances and bad experiences may have robbed you of the opportunity to find this temporarily or even permanently if you allow it. But not using the gift or seeking your purpose doesn’t make it any less valuable or any less real.  Our feelings work to guide us, and if you are feeling unfulfilled or not at ease with your current path, then start to investigate your purpose and improve your inner world.

Shifting Your Paradigm

So as we understand how energy works through all of the laws of the Universe, we can apply them to our lives. It begins with a look in the mirror at the person that you are, the thoughts you think, and the actions you take every day because of them.  These actions are a direct result of the laws or beliefs that govern you.  Lasting and powerful change can only come from within, and your change must start there as well.  Cosmetic changes on the outside will not ease a sense of unfulfillment, unhappiness, or restlessness in your life.  It all starts by changing your inner world of thoughts, beliefs, and emotions.  Your outer world is always a reflection of your inner working, not the other way around.

The first step is to identify the limits you are perpetuating through your thoughts and beliefs.  An honest evaluation can be complex and challenging because we have placed so much on our expectations. Many have been with us since our earliest days. Changing these beliefs can seem impossible, but it is only as useless as you believe it to be.

The second is to accept responsibility for your life. Don’t blame anyone or anything else for where you are right now.  People have done things, experienced pain, circumstances have been what they are, accept responsibility for it all.  You assume all the power and can now move forward.  We can’t always control the things we experience in life, but we have 100% control how we react to them.  Take responsibility for the positive and negative things in your life.

The third is to create a vision of what you would like your outer world to look like. Visualize the things that you want to accomplish and experience.  It is impossible to reach a destination if you don’t know where you want to go. Your imagination can create this destination.  What needs to change for this vision to happen? What beliefs do you hold now that don’t comply with this vision you have created?  Changing your paradigm is not easy, but it is the only way to move into the life you want.

Look Within First, The Outside will Follow.

The process of change can happen at any moment of any day. Look inside yourself and see what you are happy with and what you would like to see differently.  Where changes are needed, then accept the actions you have to take to make them happen. Then take the efforts you have to make them happen.  If you dream of being a musician, playing an instrument is a necessary step to take.  All accomplishments have a process to follow. You have to decide if you believe you have the courage to take those steps.  That is the Universal Law of Correspondence.  As we are within, so we experience without. 

“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” – Dr. Wayne Dyer.

“I am here for a purpose, and that purpose is to grow into a mountain, not to shrink to a grain of sand. Henceforth will I apply ALL my efforts to become the highest mountain of all, and I will strain my potential until it cries for mercy.”- Og Mandino.

 

 

 

 

 

21

The Why

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We should all strive to have a purpose that gives our lives fuel. Days are spent either just existing or existing for a larger purpose. The goal can be to create a family, a business, a book, a political movement, a career, or any other thing that allows you to exist for a reason outside of just being you. You can constantly develop a purpose only by becoming interested in doing something and doing it.  Too often, we get wrapped up in ourselves and mere existence that the reason for this life escapes us.  But there is always a purpose. When the focus of life is selfish or achieving something outside of ourselves, we tend to sink into unhappiness, frustration, and anger. It is always better to change our view of things outside of ourselves.

What Is an Outer Purpose?

An outer purpose is going to happen outside of yourself, to create something in the future that isn’t here today.  Setting goals is a valuable tool that will fuel your actions and push you to reach all of your destinations.  Make your purpose the journey, not the destination.  Too often, people look at their goals and use them as the be-all and end-all; they miss all of the valuable stuff we gather along the path. So there is no daily joy in following your purpose.  If your goal is to make a million dollars, there will be many decisions, actions, thoughts, and experiences to make.  Enjoy these as if they are your goal achieved because they will be.

Too many times, the destination becomes more important than the journey, and at that point, you are lost, and you miss out on the journey’s purpose.  You are mainly focusing on the things outside of your reality and yourself—looking for the future goal and missing out on the powerful, intelligent, beautiful things that come along the way.  We can live our whole lives this way if we aren’t careful. As children, we wait for school to end, then we will get a job, later a career, then a family, then retirement, and then death. We are waiting in each stage for the next step to bring us accomplishment and fulfillment, never feeling either of these two things because our purpose is aimed outside of ourselves. Aim your target inside.

What is Inside Purpose?

Well, it has nothing to do with where you are going. It has to do with the journey to get there. Like riding in a car, if you are not happy until you reach your destination, you miss out on the great things the ride offers. The view, music you listen to, or company you have as you ride.  How you get where you are going is vital to the development of your purpose.  We all have a consciousness, and some are more aware than others. But we choose how awake we are to our mission in our world. At this moment, it is the only thing you have for sure. To not make the best of it is foolishness.  So look at the step in your journey you are at right now and be conscious of the power it has.  You can choose to be frustrated and cynical or to learn whatever the moment has to give you. That is your purpose.

To live in the awareness of the present moment is not easy but will deepen your consciousness and provide a more fulfilled life experience. Letting the outside negativity of worry, fear, and want to dictate your behavior will lead to a life of complaining, anger, frustration, and lack. The outer journey of life may take a million steps to get where you want to go. The inner journey has only one, the level you are on right now. To see this is a purpose, and to embrace this step is the purpose. Look at your day and what you are learning or teaching. It could be specific information, or it could be an example you or somebody else is setting.

Establish all Your Purpose

Get out there and establish goals and start to follow your purpose. The external users will begin to guide you in the right direction. The fundamental meaning of enjoying each step of the way allows you to get what you need out of the everyday experience of having a purpose.  A life without ambition is a life that has no direction and is difficult to value. Look at your life and identify the things you want to be a purpose. It could be experiencing what you wish to have, building a family, a personal accomplishment, and establishing some legacy from your life.  Get a purpose and pursue it and always remember to enjoy the ride.

“He who has a why to live for can bear almost anyhow.”

“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.”

One of my favorite videos and songs. This guy had a purpose and made this happen. We should all drive our goals to reality.