Category Archives: 22

22

The Present Moment is All We Have

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This moment is the only one you are guaranteed to experience. That is a fact. Why do we spend so much time avoiding the only time we are guaranteed? The number of reasons is as wide and as varied as people in the world. Some are caught by the nostalgia of yesterday. Others are living for the next moment, tomorrow, next week, or next year ignoring what is happening. It is essential to understand the present moment and enjoy living in it to enjoy your life.

Notice Your Breath

The easiest way I have found to get myself into the moment is to learn to watch my breath. Breathing is one of our body’s only functions, both voluntarily and involuntarily. Left to its own, a person will breathe without a thought because oxygen is required for life. But the same function, when under observation, can bring a person into the moment and allow them to become conscious of it. It is as simple as thinking, “I am breathing in”  as you inhale, and “I am breathing out” as you exhale.

The depth of your breath has many functions to bring more oxygen to your body, brain, and heart and to allow your physical system to run more efficiently. It will also get you into the now, this moment, which is the only one we have.   You can do this silently by yourself and see the results at any time and in any place.

The Value of This Moment

You only have one life to live, a relatively short experience, and you should outlive it to be consciously aware of most of it. In the present moment, all decisions are made, and your life will be defined. If your mind is focused on the past and regrets old actions or on how good things will be tomorrow when this or that happens, you will miss the things you have to experience right now.

If you can be focused on and try to experience what is right in your life, happiness is there waiting for you. Even if the moment is hard, painful, or contains something you don’t want, it still provides the only experience you can have. To wish away or ignore the challenges is to wave away the living you are gifted in this life. Focus on your breath, and see what is happening right before you.

Be Creative

All people can be creative, and creativity will naturally bring you into the present moment. If you are practicing true creativity, there is no other place you can be. Painting, drawing, carving wood, planning a garden, working on a new invention, or making your workplace more efficient. All creativity will bring you into the present moment and allow you to experience the only time you have available to you.

Even if you are not good at something, you can still experience the present moment by pursuing it. People are often put off practicing creativity as youths because they are often told that their pursuits are excellent, but they can’t make a living. But making a living isn’t the point, and living your life is. Do not take criticism about your ability in creative pursuits personally. Create whenever the mood strikes you.

People Connect You to The Present

Every person you come in contact with in life provides an opportunity to be in the moment. Each conversation, short or long, shallow or in-depth, is an opportunity to be here in this moment. Please focus on the interaction and seek its value, and there is always value. If nothing else, then understand other people or yourself better. Paying attention to the words we speak and, even more importantly, the things we hear from others will provide guidance.

Nature Brings The Moment Alive

Getting yourself out into a natural setting will allow you to come into the present moment. You can’t help if you remove yourself from the electronic noise, get into the woods, or sit by.

Find the moment connecting with nature.

The ocean, there is a connection to the now created, and you will be living in the present moment, which is the only time you can have right now.

So much of our lives are filled with noise. My generation was raised to have the television on all the time and today’s youth live life attached to a phone, mindlessly scrolling through their lives on social media. There is no chance to be in the moment if your mind is on the past, the future, or in an unconscious state of muddled thought.

Take time to practice connecting with the present moment each day. The activities I recommend here are 1. Notice your breathing. 2. Value the moment. 3. Be Creative. 4. Connect with People. 5. Spend time in nature. 

This is the only moment you have, and all things happen at this moment.

22

Life Always Changes

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Change Your LifeEach day we are given a snapshot of our life, a moment to inhale and then let go. These moments seem like they are painted in pictures or carved in granite, observed and enjoyed later at our leisure.

This is fortunate because some people we love leave, and these memories are all that are left us. Nothing in life is permanent. These moments of quick reflection work to remind us of the past, but understand that growth will come only when you accept them as being over and move forward, which will change your life. We all carry a museum full of images and memories in our minds throughout life, but they are not relevant and accurate today because we are changing, and our minds must also change.

There is nothing in your life that is not changing every second. It is either an illusion or misunderstanding if you believe anything different. You change physically, as does your situation each day. This should not make anyone feel uneasy or experience fear, and it should be a reassuring pat on the back that you are on your way to reaching your goals and sharing accomplishments, relationships, and love not yet realized.

Small Stream of Change

Your situation in life, good or bad, will not last. We know this because nobody’s situation has ever stayed the same in the history of man. Change has always

Change Your Life
Each small stream creates its change, just as the small river of change does to your life. Subtly and almost imperceptibly, your life changes in every moment.

Come. Like a small stream of water working its way into solid granite, change works in your life daily. Slowly, almost imperceptibly, change works its way through your life. You are never at the same place in your life, ever. Different challenges, goals, people, experiences, or something else in your life are changing.

It seems like some things stay the same in the short view, but in time when you look up, you will see that everything is different. Just as the terrain around the stream never seems to change, there is a deep canyon after years. This canyon is the experience of your life. Each day you think, speak, share, and act, and these things are leaving your trail for the world to follow. Following that trial, the perceptive tracker can learn much about your journey. Maybe more than you think.

Life is Fluid

If you could view life changes as movement, they would continually play out before you, never standing still. I have often tried to capture a moment of happiness or a great experience, but that is the wrong approach. Life is energy, Change Your Lifeand as the energy of your life moves forward, you have the opportunity to influence its destination. Focusing on what we truly believe will create the tenor of events down the road.

In the book The Biology of Belief, Bruce Lipton stated that our beliefs permeate throughout our being from the cellular level, and changing a belief will change our experience. Life is fluid, and there is more than one option ahead of us based on our decisions about what we know is faithful to us and allows us to change our life.

Life isn’t a solid, unchanging mass that is the same for each of us; we can change our lives. It is an ever-changing collection of experiences that we are free to experience in fear, anger, hate, love, or any other emotion we choose to relate to. The resulting masterpiece will be your life, and you are the only artist that can paint that continually shifting story that is your life. Be wary of your life because it never stays the same; it constantly changes, and so do you.

Remember me to the highway signs, the colored lights, and the highway lines; remember me to my friends so kind, tell them I am fine…………..

22

The Simple Choice You Can Make

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What is your Choice?

Each person makes a simple choice in their lives, ultimately defining the tenor and tone of their life and all the experiences in it. No person is exempt from this decision, and we make it daily in all we do. It is impossible to fake our decision because it is written in big, bold letters on our soul’s billboard. You can try to fool the outside world and pretend for a time about your thoughts, but eventually, the truth of your choice will be revealed to yourself, and of course, to the world. It is such a pervasive choice; you can see the answer in every person you meet and in each interaction you experience throughout your life. Are you ready to think about your choice? The decision is basic and straightforward. Do you choose to be happy? Or do you choose to be unhappy?

Seems Too Simple

I thought this was too simple a choice when I first was exposed to this thought. There are many more powerful decisions than this, but look at each person you know or have ever known, and their lives are a direct display of their answer.

Your happiness is a light to others, and your unhappiness is a pervasive wet blanket of doom.

About personal happiness. I have known people in challenging situations who have found it in their constitution to find a happy thought, even behind the pain. I have also known people who have very fortunate circumstances and manage to find unhappiness in every blessing in life. This is nothing more than a personal choice.

Where do you fit in your pursuit of happiness? Do you look for the positive? It is always there behind the darkness we face. Sometimes the dark seems so pervasive and complete that we also want to allow it to define us. The death of a loved one, the end of a relationship. Or any other thing we can define as unfavorable consumes us and become a part of our story. But it doesn’t have to be, and we determine the value of these things to us. Nobody will be happy about all the suffering in life, but you can suffer, learn lessons, and not let negativity define your life. That is the choice of being happy in life.

Look Around You

If you doubt this simple choice is before everyone in the world, look at all the people you encounter in your path. Not only will you see this choice in people’s actions, but you can also feel it. Most people make a clear essential choice on a subconscious level to live a happy life or not live a happy life. Fear is the factor robbing people of happiness in life. Fear of losing something, not getting something, of the suffering of all kinds, of the past, and course of the future. Fear is toxic to your happiness, and it is virtually impossible to be afraid and happy simultaneously.

You have this choice continually in your life. You can be unhappy with your job, family, current situation, or anything else in your experience. Spend your time worrying about a million things that probably will never happen, and if they did happen, most often, it isn’t the problematic tragedy built up in your mind. You can spend that time being grateful for what you have and enjoying the things that are good and a part of your life. A good joke at work, a kindness showed, something comfortable you have in life right now. The person deciding whether you are happy in your life or not is always going to be you. Could you take responsibility for it?

Not Blind Faith

I can hear the people’s thoughts determined to be unhappy right now. Not everything is going to make you happy. That is true; how can you be pleased about losing something you love? You can’t but how you deal with that loss is your choice. You can let it destroy you and change you into a life of continual unhappiness. When you are suffering, it is hard to maintain a cheerful countenance, which will always be the truth. However, there is always something in your life, a person, hopefully, who can bring out the best in you.

If you don’t want to consider this choice, then you have made your choice already, and the results of your life experience will reflect it. I encourage you to look at your option and take responsibility for how your life unfolds for you today and every day. I choose to have a positive thought process because choosing otherwise is counterproductive and seems like a choice for continual unhappiness. Some people may find wallowing in anger, sadness, jealousy, envy, selfishness, etc. I will choose love, kindness, joy, giving, gratitude, peace, and acceptance.

This is the choice you have been making your entire life; imagine what the world would be like if everyone chose to be happy in their lives. 

“If you want to be happy, be.”-  Leo Tolstoy

“If you aren’t grateful for what you already have, what makes you think you would be happy with more.”- Roy T. Bennett.

“You can only have bliss if you don’t chase it.”-  Henepola Gunaratana

“For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness.”-   Ralph Waldo Emerson

“We don’t laugh because we’re happy – we’re happy because we laugh.”-   William James

22

Everything’s Gonna Be Alright

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Sometimes we want something so badly that it is the zenith of our conscious thought. We dwell on it and obsess about it all the time. This often leads to desperation to make something happen to force it, and sorrow is one of the most potent repulsive vibrations.

Your focus turns to what you don’t have, creating a paradox of intention. A paradox s an absurd and contradictory statement. Who would t want to win a game? Find a perfect relationship? Have a million dollars in the bank? Desperation creates a paradox in energy and brings more of that focused lack to you—the exact opposite of your stated intention. Failure I read of success is the result, but it isn’t fatal because repulsive vibrations can be adjusted to attractive vibrations with a bit of open-mindedness.

Do You Trust?

Some people see the world and see too many obstacles to overcome; others see the same field and growth opportunities. How we vi, life will drive us to experience the achievement of our goals. Developing the belief that we can accomplish our desires, regardless of our current situation, is the first step to trust and allowing. Too often, our focus is continually on what we don’t have rather than what we do have, and then it only makes sense that more of what you don’t have is coming your way. The low vi rations of desperation will not attract very much, but that is OK when higher vibrations are available with a quick change of focus and thought.

Unfortunately, the thoughts we entertain can seem like a part of us, and we refuse to look at any other option because we all have underlying human fears and emotions. What if we trust and it doesn’t work? What if we try and fail anyway? All legit ate and valid thoughts most people have at once or another. The better question is, why not try something different to see what happens? When one t it doesn’t work, it is common sense to give another a try. Get rid of the feelings of despair and choose peace in the present moment instead.

Why It Works Like This

It is impossible to be happy when we are dissatisfied with our current situation—creating an obsession with getting what we don’t have draws even more lack to us. Even when there are plenty of reasons to enjoy the present moment, they have been shoved aside to focus on the things we might have in the future, and then we will be happy. Instead o enjoying our life, we spend our time longing for more and focusing on getting it. That nagging g is feeling something is missing, and we could be happy if we only had it.

Suppose you believe that energy exists in all people and situations. In that ca e, this is a mistake because giving away today’s happiness to embrace misery about what we don’t have now but might have tomorrow shows a lack of willingness to receive. This is a shift from a mentality of appreciation to a consciousness of lack and need. And when w  make that choice, we lose our power to succeed. All relationships and experiences follow this law, especially love. If we ask for simple observation of our situation and are not where we want to be, it is time to try something different.

Why it Matters

When we focus all our thoughts through the filter of wanting something else, the results come to us, and then we are setting ourselves up for failure and projecting a desperate feeling of misery. That is, looking for something else coming down the line to make you happy rather than choosing the happiness right in front of us every day. This thou t pattern causes us to view our current situation as not good enough. How can w bring more if we are not grateful for what we have today?

This is a subtle energy that will sabotage our efforts at success if we leave them unchecked. How much t me are you spending thinking about what is wrong with your life rather than right? That does t mean we accept everything as good, but we find the good we have and focus on that. There are ways something positive for us to think about. To avoid e abrasive energy that sabotages our efforts at success and accept the vibrations that come to us when we are grateful and appreciative of what we do have is one of the most significant decisions we make every day. We need t be wary of pumping out a broadcast of despair, which brings more desperate situations and feelings of hopelessness.

The Silver Lining

Changing your thought patterns is as easy as being willing to do so. It is an escapable truth that our emotions are all charged with either positive or negative energy and vibrations. The posit e, uplifting ones are accused of the uplifting creative flow and the best results. The negative e ones create blocks and problems that keep us from what we want. But our emotions are tied inevitably and constantly to the thoughts we entertain in our minds. We need t be conscious of our reviews, and if we desire different results from what we currently have, we must be willing and open to change. Let go of urgency and desperation and engage in thoughts of gratitude for what we have, and trust that what will come is what we need and in our best interest. Shift your concentration from what you lack to all you have to appreciate to create a consciousness of success.

Remember, Don’t worry about a thing, because every little thing will be alright.

22

Avoiding the Negative Loop

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This human experience can be confusing. As we try to figure out where we fit in, something changes, and we are left looking for a new equation that will lead to our success, acceptance, and happiness. But we spend time choosing and creating narrow attachments and expectations for the outcomes. If something doesn’t work out just like we think it should, that is bad, and we choose to be unhappy. When I let go of how I think the world should be and accept it, I can also find the good in each moment.

Suffering

Life is going to bring its share of challenges. No person will live for an extended period, having everything go just perfectly. If they did, there would be no opportunity for personal growth or self-development. You would be stagnant, just as you were. It w, and it is like continually being a child with no developing maturity. Suffering comes from the thought that what is happening in your life is not as you think it should be. Something is wrong and needs to be fixed. This can result from any challenge which shakes your reality.

It can be a relatively minor thing, like an annoying co-worker, to a big something like a loved one’s death. The idea you need to fix things because they are wrong will lead you to fear, worry, insecurity, resentment, criticism of others, criticism of yourself, tensions, stress, and all things which lead to dissatisfaction and unhappiness.

What if you didn’t do that?

The alternative is to open your mind and develop a broader vision of life and the things it brings your way. Perhaps the experience you are having, no matter how unsavory or harmful, is precisely what is best for you now. You don’t have to like it, but not wanting something won’t make it go away. Dealing with the present moment will allow you to become better.

Living in the present moment, not worrying about what the future will be, or regretting the past, will allow you to make choices that honor the present and see where true fulfillment comes from. It isn’t attached to the events swirling around your life. A “good thing” here makes you happy. A “bad thing” makes you unhappy. Realizing they are all just things to which you give meaning through your mental conditioning, expectations, and attachments.

Your Power

This doesn’t mean you accept someone treating you poorly; when this occurs, you don’t take it personally as an indictment of your value and see it as a clear issue of the person mistreating you. A loved one’s death is a sad occasion, but feeling bad won’t bring anyone back to life; the reality of the situation is what it is. How you deal with it, move on from it, and see your gratitude for the departed person’s influence on your life will allow you to grow and develop your power despite the loss.

Shift of Perspective

It is not an easy shift, moving your perspective from one of the ego-defined expectations to source-centered acceptance. If a life of fulfillment is your ultimate goal, then some movement in this direction is warranted. It will allow you to not drift to and from happiness to sadness based on the things occurring outside of you. Living like this gives all the power to those things. Never knowing from moment to moment if you will have the rug pulled out from underneath you or not.

Learning to see events as things outside of you and not letting them define your happiness is a rare power. Not identifying with our conditioned expectations, we can approach all situations with an open mind and heart. This will bring on feelings of acceptance, well-being, and ease about the events of your life. They are things that happen, not defining points of your character. In this understanding and practice, one will probably realize that life is, in fact, OK, just as it is. What if our most feared moments are just opportunities to grow?

22

Think About What You Believe

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Beliefs are the ideas we have chosen to provide a particular attachment to. These are thoughts we have been told during our lives that have been backed up by experience and our emotional reactions to them. It is essential to recognize our beliefs because they will form the paradigms of our lives. These rules will determine the reality we experience in our lives, so identifying the limiting beliefs and actively working to change them can make your life much more positive.

The Birth of Beliefs

Our fundamental beliefs come to us early on in life. One’s parent’s attitudes about life builds our own belief system, and we will create our reality and ideas about almost everything out of this. From money to personal relationships. They are all created and imprinted on our subconscious by our parents and family. These beliefs will be either positive or negative, empowering or enslaving, depending 0n  experience. If you get messages “like, can’t possibly accomplish”that ” or arena aren’t smart enough to do” that” or isn’t realistic, you will never be able to make a living ” it.”  The reality of your life is going to be limited by those beliefs.

If, on the other hand, the messages received were more supportive and encouraging, these beliefs will propel you into success much more accessible. The things we believe and the paradigms of our lives dictate our reality. It goes deeper than what you say in words and includes the example you set. If there are general mistrust and unhappiness in your life, you are building a belief that the world is full of peoplcan’t can’t trust. Although some can’t be charged, many are very trustworthy and kind. Your belief will carry over to the next generation, embedding itself and creating the reality that exists.

How to Change a Belief

Once a belief is embedded, and you accept it as true, it won’t change until new evidence strongly refutes it and causes the old paradigm to be discarded, and the new belief takes its place. This process will be different for everyone, depending on your ideas and how open you are limitationsto change.

If you are set in your ways and look at change as a danger, it will be challenging to change your belief. Simply put, you will not seek change until it becomes apparent there is a problem with what you are thinking and believing right now. Wanting to change and, in fact, seeing the need to change is the first step. Then it is a matter of deciding what you want to believe about money, relationships, charity, work, friends, family, or any other area affecting your life.

Then it is a matter of reprogramming your subconscious, and there are many ways to do this. Some involve changing your belief bit by bit, and others involve rapid and immediate change. The best way to change a limiting belief is to recognize the idea, where it came from, and how it is hurting your life now. Constructing a new belief will involve using your imagination and introducing images that connect to emotion about what you want to believe.

Changing A Limiting Belief is Simple but Not Easy

Some information I have read on this topic has stressed the difficulty of creating changes that last in your belief system, but most people who purport this message want to sell you something. My experience is that most beliefs can be changed quickly, which can last.

Simple method: 1. identify the problem in writing 2. write down the change you want to see in your beliefs. 3. Create positive thoughts (affirmations)  that support those thoughts  4. Read them, say them, and repeat them with emotion until the positive thought replaces the limiting belief. You will know it has happened in your experiences as thoughts change, life changes.

You may think that nothing is that simple, but it is a choice to keep letting the beliefs that limit you control your reality or move on to something better.

“Thoroughly unprepared, we take the step into the afternoon of life. Worse still, we take this step with the false presupposition that our truths and our ideals will serve us as hitherto. But we cannot live the afternoon of life according to the progrlife’slife’s morning, for what was great in the morning will be little at evening and what in the morning was true, at evening will have become a lie.” ~C.G. Jung

“You begin to fly when you let go of self-limiting beliefs and allow your mind and aspirations to rise to greater he gets.” ―Brian T

“Don’t limit yourself. Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do, and you can go as far as your mind lets you. What you believe, remember, you can achieve.” 

“Do just once what others can’t do, and you will never pay attention to their limitations again.” 

“Learning too soon our limitations, we never learn our powers.” —Mignon McLaughlin.

“Every person takes the limits of their field of vision for the limits of the world.” —Arthur Schopenhauer.

22

Make Your Life More Abundant

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abundanceLike many people, I look at how much I have and wonder if I should be doing things to attract more into my life. More money, more love, more everything! My interest led me to investigate, and I started to do some research on the topic. I found a bunch of ideas about attracting more abundance into your life. We all think that we will be happier if we have more money, love, fame, or whatever. That is a philosophical statement for another day. Today, there are three simple things that you can start doing today that will make your life more abundant in what you are seeking.

Gratitude Journal

I have always been a fan of the gratitude journal. I have kept one sporadically over the last three to four years. When I was diligent, in all honesty, more came into my life in all areas. You get busy and tell gratitude journalyourself; I will think about them and not write them down. In my experience, much of those thoughts’ power is left behind. So the simple process I use is: I write ten things I am grateful for each morning over the past 24 hours. I will try to make 3 of the new stuff. I believe the activity’s value is thinking about the genuine gratitude you feel about each thing. Adding new items creates a mindset of looking for what you are grateful for and not taking things for granted. We are a fortunate society, and you see a list of items daily to feel thankful for.

I think this works because it creates an energy of gratitude. If you are a believer in personal power, what you focus on brings more of that into your life. Being grateful for what you have will get more of that into your life. Be thankful for the love in your life, and soon you will find more of it in your life.

Give Freely

This isn’t easy because I always say I will gladly give when I have more stuff. The problem with that is I never know when that is. Fear of not having enough will stop you from passing, but giving freelyto get it, you always have to give. I don’t think it means giving everything you have but establishing a mindset of giving. That allows you to deal with a feeling of abundance, not lack.

Giving doesn’t have to be financial either, and I think giving with the right attitude of your time and talents can be just as powerful for creating abundance in your life. Again I believe that the attitude you start by looking for opportunities to give is the key to attracting more lot into your life. Give without a chance of recognition, and that creates the best energy. When you give, you accept that there is more on the way, and it always is. If you are afraid that you will be lacking, you focus on lack, and what you focus on will grow in your life.

I would encourage people to start small and see what happens. Give and watch. I have done a few experiments, and most have positive results. Give a small amount freely and see what happens. Give because you want to and focus on that. Don’t think of the lack. Think of the abundance, and hope that your gift can genuinely help someone else. It could be money, donated clothes, the time you gave, or even a conscious choice to be kind.

Set Clear Intentions

Almost every book I have read about creation, abundance, or self-improvement. The first thing you have to do is to know what you want, specifically. Many people have the generic answer of more love or money, and those generic intentions will bring generic results. It seems that asking clearly for what you want is essential in attracting more abundance into your life. Don’t be afraid to ask for exactly what you want.

Like anything, practice is the key to doing this. We have been conditioned to believe that we have no control over what we get. But there is increasing evidence through Quantum Physics that we are absolutely in control of what we see in our lives. Set a clear intention, and believe that it can happen, take action toward it, and it will happen. Don’t skip over that TAKE ACTION part because that is the key. Your efforts provide the momentum to your intention and move them from the page of thought into reality.

You can try these three simple practices today to investigate, drawing more abundance into your life. More money, love, or success. Whatever it is that you are looking for. I always try to remember that we are unique spiritual beings placed on Earth to have a great experience, not suffer and be unhappy.

A little song of gratitude for you

https://youtu.be/kGJFDHRPE94

22

Move Toward the Positive

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Suppose you are honestly looking at your thoughts and see too many ideas and feelings falling into the negative. In that case, it is time for you to reevaluate how you are thinking and to start learning how to say “goodbye” to negativity. It is simple to do, but it isn’t easy. We are hardwired to be harmful, and changing that programming takes a slight rise in your level of consciousness and embracing the present moment of your life. Here are some ideas on how to move toward the positive.

Negativity Rising

Negativity rises from us as we deny the present moment of experience we are having. That means we spend too much time living in our future or our past and not enough time in the only moment we have, the present. Much of our negativity comes from fears we face, which result from putting our thoughts in the future. Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, and worry are all from a fixation on the future and projections of the mind about what might happen. Our brains can create all sorts of doomsday scenarios for all aspects of our lives. We could be fired, get into an accident, lose someone, become a victim of a crime, or do any other horrible thing. A negative mindset is a natural result if you live with these fantasies.

So too, are the visits of the past and their ghosts of forgiveness. Suppose you allow your mind to troll through memories, searching for moments of guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, or any other negative experience. In that case, you are taking yourself to a place of negativity that may or may not even be real. We all remember things the way we want to remember them. Two people can see the same event and come to two different stories. Your memories of wrongs done in the past are as accurate. The past is over, and there isn’t anything you can do to change it. Learn whatever lesson you can glean, but leave the emotion out because all that will do is take you into a negative headspace, which is out of the only place we can live here, at the current moment. Forgive the past and those in it, most importantly yourself. It is all water over a dam, and it is our most significant challenge to let it go.

Today is All We Have

Accepting where we are at this moment is the beginning of any significant journey. When it comes to leaving negativity behind, look at where you are and decide what you want the tenor of this moment to be. Your thoughts will determine if you will spend time in the painful negative or the positive area of your life. Look at the things in your present moment—the weather, the sounds, the feelings, and the experience right now. Look at your thoughts and bring them into the present moment, rather than focus on the past’s wrongs or future worries. Focus on your experience now because that is all you will ever have.

Through a conscious look at the present, you can observe the things creating negativity, unease, discontent, and tension within you. Usually, they will arise because of an unnecessary judgment of others and resistance to the present moment. We develop habits of thought, just like we develop patterns of behavior. Most people take the same route to work because it takes less thought and effort to do this. The same can be said for our thoughts. Our patterns are developed and continually play along on an unconscious loop. Only the light of conscious awareness can interrupt these patterns. All negativity is a resistance to what is in one form or another. Stop resisting and move forward happily.

Self Observation

This is the tool for operating on a more conscious level of living. Watch your mental environment and see how it contributes to your emotional state. Our thoughts are naturally attached to an emotion based on our experiences in life. Try to direct your attention inward and observe the thoughts your mind is producing. Look at what you are feeling because of the ideas you have. Negative thoughts will lead to negative emotions. When an uncomfortable feeling appears, look at how you are avoiding, resisting, or denying your life right now.

Often people resent others and are not used to expressing this because of the fear of hurting feelings or making someone angry. But the emotion you feel is there for a reason, and bottling it up is unhealthy and leads to resentment and negativity. The cure is natural. Stop doing what you are doing and speak to the people involved, fully expressing what you feel. Or let go of the negativity you are feeling around the situation. It serves absolutely no definite purpose. All it will give you is powerful negativity in your life.

Acceptance

When negativity arises, learn to accept the things about you which have allowed them to rise to the surface. It is a part of your story, not one that has to run on forever. Once you practice accepting your thoughts, emotions, and reactions to things, please take the next step and start to notice the catalysts to these feelings as they come up in your mind. Seeing the entrance of all negative emotions will allow you to stop yourself from creating them in the first place.

An honest acceptance of all things, people, situations, actions, and feelings about them will eliminate negative emotions. You are living in this moment and conscious of your experience, and that will allow you to function without judgment and resistance to your life as it is. Negativity has no chance to be created in your life.

“Protect your enthusiasm from the negativity of others.”- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

“I think we manifest the very thing we put out. If you’re putting out negativity, you will retrieve that same sentiment. If you emanate joy, it comes back to you.”- Robin Wright.

“There are so many great things in life; why dwell on negativity?”- Zendaya.

 

22

The Rooms You Live In

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Are we looking for answers or looking for ourselves when we visit?

Perception is a unique thing people experience. Each person can see or experience something and choose to have specific thoughts and emotions about it. Two people can have the same moments together and take away a different perception of that thing.

This change happens all the time in relationships, and recently I have been reminded what I have perceived about other people, the places we have gone, and the emotions we shared were not the same. Throughout the past year, I have had many adventures that greatly valued me. I look at these experiences as rooms in my memory. I can visit any time I choose and remember the joy of the shared experience. The sad truth is that I am only half of those memories, and perhaps my thoughts and emotions about these times were less than I imagined. In this story, you will have to judge the value of my room of memory.

Entering a memory in your mind is like entering a standard room from your childhood home. You walk around and see things that bring up thoughts and emotions. However, some of the things you think you remembered well, you did not remember clearly. Or at least it must be so, or how else could that experience carry no weight with another? It was only you that loved that moment. A special memory of something loses its magic and loses its power. Somehow knowing what you thought was one thing was another makes it seem like a waste. I have entered many rooms lately and seen many valuable things destroyed.

The Entryway

The beginning, a friendship that turned into something more, the exciting beginning where I remember every detail and know that I was out of breath simply because I was near you. I felt fun, alive, spontaneous, and invigorated. But most of all, I felt accepted. I look around the room and see the world’s giant telephone, a cold day in Rockland, pancakes at a diner, all things that happened, or at least I think they did.

But if they did happen and the events of this room are actual, how could it be like a museum now? Where did they go? If joy like that was meant to be so fleeting, then why bother anyway? I do not know the answer to these questions, and I only see as I look at the dust-covered thoughts of that time that there is no way to touch them now.

The Living  Room

This place is one of my favorite rooms to visit because it is all I loved about being with you and all the things you hated about being with me. The emojis I would send you every day to tell you something about how I cared about you. A cello because it is your favorite instrument, a boat because my ship came in the day I met you. A red balloon because of a movie we saw together. All of these things are in this room.

But we know now that they don’t have any real meaning. These things are only remembered here by me, and that is making me wonder if they ever happened or if they ever existed at all. Was it all in my imagination? No, it couldn’t have been because I am in this room. But I am here alone remembering…………

The Entertainment Room

Well, then, there is this room of yours where I have difficulty opening the door. As I step in and look around, I am hit by the feeling of being kind and friendly. I once thought I had never met anyone as kind and gentle as you, and you were all of that: supportive, accepting, understanding, and everything a person could want. I often wondered what I had done to deserve such a beautiful soul in my life. Like a sunset or a sunrise, as the sky turns a fantastic color, it will only be for a short time, and so were you.

As I move around the room, the mood changes from kind and sweet to selfish and aloof. The kind words, pleasant thoughts, exciting ideas, and support receded and were replaced with uncaring, unfamiliar coldness. I think the person I knew and loved died that day, which took away one of the best friends I had ever known. She was gone, and only a shell of her was left behind. A sad replica of something beautiful is all that is left. This feeling only stands to remind me of the promise of opportunity lost. That room is the most difficult to visit, but it teaches the best lessons.

The Recovery Room

There could be no trip like this without a recovery room because we all need time to heal and start to come back from these moments of pain and suffering. Please make no mistake about it; you caused a lot of suffering: your choices, your words, your actions, and nobody else’s. Fortunately, even in a horrible situation like this, where you feel deceived for months, there are valuable lessons you can gather. There has been little about you that has been kind or nice in a very long time.

First, your situation is not the thing but how you think about it. I have learned to be less of an enslaved person to my thoughts and emotions, and I had to survive you. Second I have learned that though it was all a lie. I enjoyed being a part of a duo and that there is a power in that combination. Even though your joyful moments were seemingly all fake, mine was not, and I am grateful for the experience of being happy and sharing those moments. I cherish them even if you don’t. Because I can’t make you remember these things with fondness, but neither can you rob me of the joy I had in those moments.

As I close the door, I wonder why I bother to visit these places of memories of camping, sightseeing, birthday celebrations, and daring fun. They happened in my life, but what did they mean? I have to admit I have no concept of what is meaningful to anybody anymore. Or at least I don’t know what should be significant for me. These are my rooms, and I am doomed to wander them looking for answers I never found.

 

22

Wisdom Comes from Suffering

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Change is a constant factor people deal with every day of their life. All situations are continually changing and morphing into something else. Most of the changes we experience are so subtle that we don’t even notice them today. But that doesn’t make them any less real.

They are there, allowing the cycle of all things to flow into your life. All items have a beginning, a middle, an ending, and the force of change powers that cycle. Sometimes we let the changes happen out of our control, and others when we are the force of change. The muscles that cause people to initiate change and make positive changes are the focus of today’s thoughts. Change is not all fun and peace in your life. It can be painful, angry, and violent. When you lose something extraordinary, that means the world to you because it paints it in a different light because of change. Wisdom comes from suffering, and change brings suffering. It is time to delve into your knowledge, enhance experiences, and be grateful for them, the pain, and your path. Change uptime.

Why We Initiate change in Our Lives

Things will change naturally, but there are times when we all initiate change in our lives. One of the primary reasons is that we experience pain. We have attempted something in the past, and it was painful. Something is happening now, and it is sad. Or we can connect the dots between right now and the future, giving a good chance of bringing the pain. If any of these are your experience with anything, you will probably decide to change it. Pain or, more accurately, the fear of experiencing pain will dictate change.

Evaluating all aspects of the change you decide to make is essential. Pain is a great teacher, but it also builds fear in us. Then we lose our confidence, and our ability to accomplish things is compromised. Use your courage to face fear and embrace changes that you want or need in your life. Change for the sake of making your life better rather than fearing pain.

How to Change

Here is a simple method to create positive change in your life. First, get a clear and focused vision of what you want your life to change. Too many times, you have the opportunity to change your life in a good way, a job that suits you more, a better place to live, or some other aspect of life that you could address, but if you have no plan for change, you are likely to stand pat where you are. Even if that place is not so positive, get a clear and focused goal.

Then it is essential to be open to using all of your opportunistic forces to develop the tools and skills you need to change your life best. Find examples of people who had achieved what you sought before you and use them as positive role models. It is estimated that 80% of success in anything requires a role model to show you the way. Most people are very generous with their time and are more than willing to help somebody do what they have already done. Don’t be afraid to seek those role models to help you positively change your life.

Finally, it is essential to resolve all of your inner conflicts and embrace changes. We all carry baggage from our past, and that past existed for a reason. Usually, it teaches us a lesson if we pay attention. Don’t let a lack of confidence or an awful experience cost you your dreams today. We all have ability and talent, and let yours develop. Don’t let an issue from the past stop you from changing in positive ways.

Change, change, change.

Embrace the magic that change can bring and allow yourself to grow from it all. Please don’t spend your life fighting against it. Life is a constant dance of transformation. From birth to death, we all are continually changing. Don’t fight it. Embrace the change you face as the opportunity it is. Ten years from now, you will look back and see how different you are from 10 years ago as you were ten years before. Move all of your positive direction changes, and life will become a much more enjoyable experience.

“The art of life lies in a constant readjustment to our surroundings.” —Kakuzō Okakura, The Book of Tea.

“I cannot say whether things will get better if we change; what I can say is they must change if they are to get better.” —Georg C. Lichtenberg.

“Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.” —John F. Kennedy.