Tag Archives: fixed mindset

22

Building a Mindset

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I heard once it is possible that of the more than 7 billion people on this planet, most will live out the entirety of their life and never contemplate anything deep or thoughtful about their existence before they die. It makes me think everyone should spend a little time each day considering their cosmic presence.

But maybe life is more comfortable, not considering the meaning of things. Thoughts about how you look at life and why we are here develop around our mindset. Recently I read the book Mindset by Carol S. Dweck. She discusses the two significant attitudes that exist, the growth mindset and the fixed mindset. Excellent thought for how you approach life, learning, and success presents here, and it would be worth your while to take the time to read through this one.

Know Your Fixed Mind

The bottom line is most people pull from both sides of this spectrum, having characteristics of each mindset, depending on the situation. First is the fixed mindset. The belief that you have the talent to do something or you don’t. Much of your self-esteem builds by results, rankings, and the ease with which something is accomplished. Challenges are avoided, and change is not welcome. In a fixed mindset, people focus on limiting you and often feel helpless when needing to change a situation. Criticism is seen as a personal attack, and they rarely leave their comfort zone. Most important, though, is the fixed mindset that thinks putting effort into something is a waste, and they rarely seek to learn new things.

I would be harder on this mindset, but I have practiced it for large parts of my life in many areas. We worry more about appearances than what would make us happier, better, or contribute significantly to the world. Beginning to recognize the fixed mindset in me has allowed me to step beyond it and look for ways to become better. Fear is behind the fixed mindset of not being accepted as who we are. Fear of not being perfect. Fear of experiencing failure. That is what happens when we let the results define our lives and provide our value. The narrow, limiting view of the fixed mindset, driven by fear, is how many live their lives. I hope to leave doubt far behind me.

Step Into Your Growth Mindset

If you look at your life, the moments when you felt the best about yourself and your accomplishments probably came from practicing the growth mindset. We welcome challenges in this frame of mind because we see their ability to help us become better and wiser and contribute more. We embrace change as an inevitable part of life. Continually seek opportunities to build. The thought is that anything is possible with the right plan, consistent practice, and maximum effort. Growth mindset, people, see learning and constructive criticism as something to be desired and sought out. New things are pleasant, and they love exploring them.

There is a lesson that will lead to your ultimate success in every failure if you take the time to learn about it. Rather than being afraid of not knowing, these people see challenges as an excellent opportunity to become better at whatever they are diving into. In a typical school, the growth mindset is not encouraged or recognized. Becoming better or growing should be life’s number one goal because growth brings purpose, fun, and interest and allows the best version of yourself to rise to the surface.

Building the Growth Mindset

Look at yourself and how you approach new things. Are you afraid to fail? Do you worry so much about what others think you limit yourself, give a half-hearted effort, or see failing as the worst thing possible? If you do, you are operating from a fixed mindset. We all tend to have a limited and growth-oriented mindset, depending on what area of life we live in. In some ways, we might be fearless and growth-oriented, and in others, we can be fearful and operating c

“Amid winter, I found there was within me an invincible summer. And that makes me happy. For it says, no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within, there’s something stronger- something better, pushing right back.”

“Every mistake you make is progress toward accomplishment.”

 

22

Keep On Trying

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Don’t Give Up. YOU Are Almost There.

Keep going, you never know how close you are to success!!
Keep going. You never know how close you are to success!!

All people have moments when they have to question themselves. Things in life won’t always go your way, and there will be a lot of times when it may seem hopeless. Everything you encounter seems to be against you, and it can become an unbearable weight, and in that moment of darkness and frustration, you may feel like giving up. Those are the moments it is vital you find the strength and inspiration to hang on because there is always a pendulum of change coming your way. Darkness serves a purpose just as light does. Good things will come into your life if you can maintain hope and heart long enough.  Change is constant and inevitable and will allow for tough times to end and prosperity to enter your life.

Down Times Necessary

In all things in life, contrast exists to provide meaning to each experience. There needs to be an opposite experience for every positive emotion and experience to give different and lend sense to the value of what you are experiencing.

There is no appreciating a warm summer day if you haven’t experienced the bitter cold of winter. Joy gets its value from the comparison of desperation. Happy and sad, loneliness and a relationship, each enjoyable experience needs to have a polar opposite. That needs to be experienced to understand what the great things in life mean and the value they give you.  If you give up when sharing the despair of difficult times, you will never know the joy of redemption or the satisfaction coming back will provide you.

Contrast Provides Meaning

All people go through times of sorrow in life. The difference is that some people let those times define in front 3them, and others move past them into a more profound understanding that often, low moments of sorrow provide a springboard for a deeper understanding or a more decisive action that brings you closer to your ultimate happiness and understanding of life.  The downtimes will get you ready for the happy times to come and for you to appreciate them.

Look at the BIG Picture

Even though we don’t look for situations that make us feel broken, they are sometimes needed to grow into better people.  Life is a long game that needs to be viewed from looking down at the whole thing. Like a caterpillar turns into a butterfly, your transformation is possible.

You may be struggling now, but if you look ahead and see the best possible results, it will make you more successful. That is what is waiting, nobody in the world was born to be sad all the time, and there will be great moments ahead of you regardless of what your life is giving you right now.

Put your head down and keep moving forward because today’s clouds will eventually give way to the bright skies of tomorrow. All you have to do is stay in the game long enough to experience it.  Moving ahead is the only place where you will find your dreams. Everything you want is in front of you, and you must move ahead to greet it.

Failure is Not Fatal

In school, we are taught that failure is a fatal mistake; it is the thing we must avoid at all costs.  Better to play it safe than to take a chance at something we might fail at.  Learning is about setting a task, making a plan, trying it out, and evaluating what happens. If it doesn’t work, that isn’t a failure. It is learning.  Take that lesson and try again, and soon you will be experiencing nothing but success.

People often face life with a fixed mindset, avoiding even the idea that they don’t know something and pretending to know when a simple question would have ended all doubt.  Be a growth mindset person.  Accept challenges, be willing to learn, and ask questions, and soon you will see the opportunity that “so-called” failure provides. Failure is not fatal, and it is necessary to become all that you can be and gain value in life lessons.

“It always seems impossible until it’s done.” ―Nelson Mandela

“How long should you try? Until.” ―Jim Rohn

“There is no failure except in no longer trying.” ―Elbert Hubbard

“Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.” ―Harriet Beecher Stowe

 

22

Developing A Growth Mindset at Any Age

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Develop a Mindset of Growth

The mind continually provides us with thoughts, and without conscious input, the ideas we create will be based on the past and the history of our experience. Our thoughts, emotions, words, and actions come from two essential mindsets: a fixed mindset or a growth mindset.  Each is present in most people. In some areas, we are fixed in our thoughts, and in others, we are more than willing to believe we can grow.  The challenge is to look at life and your attitude towards it and recognize what type of mindset you are using.  You may be OK with your thought process either way, but being conscious of your thoughts and the mindset they lead can help you reach your goals, develop your dreams, and enjoy life more. But that is a choice.

Fixed Mindset

In my life, I know I have spent plenty of time with a fixed mindset. It stemmed from never wanting to make mistakes and be seen as weak or less than perfect. Here are a few aspects of the fixed mindset:  1. Avoid challenges- because they prove we don’t know it all already.  2. We Hate change because we have to readjust and grow.  We would instead, the world think we knew it all and were perfect.  3. Focus on limitations, not enough, money, time, love, freedom, opportunity, or whatever else is seen as a limiting factor. 4. Criticism is seen as a personal insult rather than a chance to grow. I would rather hear insincere praise than mindful construction. 5. Believes either you have the talent to do something or don’t, no chance to develop the skill. 6. This leads to a lack of confidence in learning something new and developing a goal or a dream. You are stuck with what you have at the beginning.  See learning as something you do as a young person, not a lifelong process.

When you look at your mindset, there will be some of these characteristics. We are multifaceted and complicated beings with many layers. The trick is to look at yourself and what you think and ask if those thoughts are taking you where you would like to be? Are they making you your best? Or are they limiting you in some way? Only you can answer those questions.  I encourage you and myself not to limit ourselves and develop until this journey’s end.

Growth Mindset

A growth mindset is one of the possibilities and development in your life.  I try to develop this in all areas of my life. It is not a finished product but one that is continually growing and learning throughout the process.  And to be OK with not knowing something and becoming better at it.  To welcome new experiences and see what they feel like.  Some aspects of the growth mindset are 1. You welcome challenges. A challenge will provide new experiences and becoming a more well-rounded person.  2. Change is embraced, a natural part of life, and all things continually and inevitably change. Embracing change is embracing life. 3. Look for opportunities to grow and have new experiences.  4. Think anything is possible; with the right amount of preparation and effort, you can set, learn about, and accomplish anything you dream about.  5. Love learning and exploring new things. See feedback as a helpful guide, not a personal condemnation. See it as a lifetime process.   6. See the lessons in every failure, and don’t let it deter effort in future opportunities.

Developing a growth mindset is more complicated than it seems. We are programmed to be perfect from the time we are children. It is all the beginnings of it: stand in line, sit up straight, follow the rules, and do what you are told. When you are told what is good and evil, if you have any thought out of that narrow scope, you are labeled evil.  The growth mindset allows you to understand that nobody is perfect, and you can continually develop throughout your life. The only limits you have are the ones you don’t dare to move beyond.  There is the opportunity to keep growing and changing throughout life.

The Choice

You have to make today and all days hereafter to decide what mindset will be dominant in your experience.  Do you believe that what you know is what you know, and what you are now, you will always be?  Or do you see the endless landscape of possibility that exists if you dare to take steps to travel into it?  There will be a failure on the way, which is not a personal condemnation of you. It is a learning experience where valuable information about future movements will be determined. You alone can decide to have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset.  The color and direction of your life will be determined by this choice you must make continually.

 “It’s not that I’m so smart; it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” -said Albert Einstein.

“When you take risks, you learn that there will be times when you succeed, and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important.” – Ellen DeGeneres.

“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” – Thomas Edison.

“Failure is an important part of your growth and developing resilience. Don’t be afraid to fail.” -Michelle Obama

 

21

Friendly Imagination

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Imagination- the faculty or action of forming new ideas or images or concepts of external objects not present to the senses.

The human mind is a powerful tool. It can recall information and perform intricate calculations while still managing to keep a physical body functioning appropriately. A mind can create imaginary situations and scenarios that allow us to create new things and unique events in our lives.

The mind has an imagination that can go to places that have never existed or might only exist in the future.  Unfortunately, this creative imagination can sometimes work against us. Fear creeps into our lives and starts to use our imaginations against us. You are creating worst-case scenarios that raise our anxiety levels about things that never have and probably never will happen. If you are experiencing this misuse of imagination, it is time to control your thoughts and use the power of your vision for you and not against you.  It is all up to the ideas you choose to entertain, the corresponding emotions you will deal with because of your choice—the words you use to describe things. And the actions you take to enhance or diminish the power of your imagination.

What Can Go Right?

Too often, we spend our thoughts worrying about what might go wrong.  This fear is a thing that develops over time. As we experience suffering in life, we try to create a safety zone in our minds where nothing unexpected ever happens. The working theory is that if we can imagine the worst, it won’t take us by surprise, and we can handle it if it happens.  So we weave tales of terror and woe and play out our imaginary reactions to the situations.  Although they are in our minds, the stress they create is felt by us.  It is hard to experience happiness if you only imagine the most painful things your life can bring.

Rather than spend your time worrying about what might go wrong, how about switching your focus to what can go right? One of the more powerful tools of creation we have is our imagination. Used to imagine a successful result, it can move you down the path to creating that very thing in your life. Think of a goal achieved and how that is going to feel for you. Put it aside and start taking action toward making that thing a reality. Your imagination can help keep you motivated and show you how good life can be when your goals come into existence.  Also, there is the added benefit. When your mind is creating positive thoughts, the negative thought train shuts down.  Focus on what can go right rather than what might go wrong.

Overcoming Anxiety

It seems like we feel we have to know all the answers.  Well, nobody has this ability.  Since our youngest days, we have been conditioned to be “smart” and never look “stupid” and always have the answer.  This mindset is a fixed way of thinking where people seem to believe either we have a talent or not.  Some lucky people start to realize that we are not born with all the answers or abilities. Those things are developed through the learning process and become whatever version of ourselves we want.

The larger group would rather pretend to know the answer rather than reveal a lack of knowledge.  The fear that people might find out this “weakness” is one of the causes of anxiety. They fear that they will reveal as less of a person or a person of less value.  It is an illusion of perfection our society demands, but it is just an illusion.

Nobody is perfect, and nobody knows everything.  When we start to look at all situations as opportunities for growth, rather than tests our current knowledge and base our value on it, anxiety will lessen in our lives.  So what if you don’t know everything? That is called learning. Having a growth mindset sets you free to learn, improve, and become your best at whatever you want to excel at in your life.  Your only limits of accomplishment are then the limits of your imagination.  Rather than using your imagination to conjure up how other people see you negatively, use it, creating a real-world, achieving what you want.

Only So Much Room

Finally, remember worry is a misuse of your imagination, and it will only fill your head with fear and anxiety.  These are forces that can destroy your health and make you unhappy.  Thoughts develop in patterns, and if you are in a mode of worry, it is all you can think of, and there isn’t any room in your head for anything else.  It makes sense to take logical steps for your safety and well-being, but to obsess about negative things happening to you and those you love is a negative chute. It is hard to come out of and change direction.  There is only so much room in your head, just like in your house. Why fill it with junk? It costs you the delight of space and positivity.   Look at your thoughts and how they affect your imagination today.  Use your imagination wisely.

“Worry is a misuse of your imagination.”- Dan Zadra

“Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.”- A.S. Roche

“We will weather the weather,

Whatever the weather,

Whether we like it or not.”

 

21

Moving Forward

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Life is a Journey; we choose our direction alone.

Life is a journey from where we are in this moment to where and what we want to be in the future.  Some people listen to the things others tell them in regards to how their lives should look.  What job to have, where to live, how to live, what to like, how to spend your leisure time. The opinions of others will guide all of our activities and thoughts if you let them, like sleepwalking through your life. Then some people start to notice living like this, doing what someone tells you to do. Despite the fact it feels empty and unfulfilling, is no way to live.  It is for these people I am writing this. We are all on a spiritual journey, whether we choose to realize it or not.  The movement of growth in our lives is happening, and We are all moving forward into our development or hiding in the safety of our past.  That is the choice you are making every day.  Here are a few simple thoughts and tools to help you move into a more aware life of your journey.

Develop a mindset of Growth

Since growth involves moving forward, it seems our development mindset will be a vital tool to develop.  Carol Dweck wrote a whole book about it, but to me, merely understanding we can move our lives in any direction we want. The first step is not to let our patterns of thinking stop us. I know many talented and potentially great people stop themselves from success by their fixed mindsets. Look at your thoughts and evaluate where they land. I am not telling you what is good or bad for you. That is a choice we all make for ourselves.  The way forward is growth, and you are the determining factor about what you learn and what you don’t, just as I am the determining factor for me.

Fixed mindsets believe you have the talent to do something, or you don’t. If you can’t do something on the first try, you shouldn’t even try.  A growth mindset sees life as a process. You may not be able to master something in one attempt, but if you keep trying, you will eventually find success. Fixed mindset people are so afraid of being wrong and judged as faulty, they never even try anything new. A life of fear is a life of safety, but you won’t become what you want to be.  A growth mindset embraces the new, tries for the experience, not for the result.  All ends will bring you a lesson and valuable information so that the next try will be different and more successful.  What is your mindset today?

How Do You Move?

Is your choice taking you towards or away from the best version of yourself?

Each of us has an image of the ideal person we want to be. It may be how you physically want to look, or how much money you want to have in the bank, or the relationship you want to share your life.  All of our choices are either moving us toward this ideal or away from it.  Think about that, you make thousands of small decisions every day, and each one is pushing you in a direction and toward a result.  Being aware of your choices and what they mean for your desired results gives you the power to move closer to being the best version of yourself.

Where do you move to today? If you desire a great body, what food you choose to put into your mouth, the exercises you do, and the sleep you decide to get will determine your health — moving you closer or farther away from that idea. It is most important to take responsibility for our movement. It is our decisions that impact us in one direction or another.  If I choose to be in a relationship with a self-centered narcissist, am I moving closer or further away from my ideal relationship? I have to take responsibility for my choice, which has driven me further away from where I want to be. All of our decisions have power and direction. Keep this in mind as you make your thousands of choices today. Are you moving toward or away?

The Point of Choice

Let’s start looking at those choices we make in more detail.  In all instances, even the most snap decisions we make, there is a moment where two or more roads are available and open to us. This location is the point of choice, and it is from here we form and create our lives. I know I have allowed the subconscious autopilot of my mind to make too many choices for me. There is comfort in choosing the things you have

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always done. You can clearly understand the results. But it is essential to realize just because you always choose one thing. There are a host of other possibilities out there waiting for you in the world. You can always choose a different path.

Take time in your day and look at the decisions you make consciously.  Why are you choosing the coffee you drink? The route to work? What do you wear? How do you speak to others? How do you think about other people? Is it the result you want to allow you to grow? Or are these things the choices you have always made? Safe and sound moments that hold you solidly in the past and place. You will not become something else if you cling to the mold of what you currently are. So often, it isn’t the decisions we make but our judgments about them that determine how they affect our lives.  We think something is terrible. After all, our mothers told us it was good because we saw a commercial in the media telling us exactly how to think and feel about things.  Your choice is to be a sheep or to make your path.

In the End, You Make Your Life

It is a result of your choices of the substance of your life springs. Complain if you want. Be angry about how much money you have and the career you are experiencing. Be disappointed with your relationships in life.  Then understand that you have been the creator of it all and the choices you have made.  Now you have the chance to move in a different direction, in a movement of positive growth. Have the understanding of yourself and your journey and know a step into the uncertain abyss of life is a step into development, and hiding where you are in the safety of the simple, is a trap. Get out of the web.  Life is a journey from where we are right now in this moment to where and what we want to be in the future.

“Don’t go through life; grow through life.” – Eric Butterworth

“One can choose to go back toward safety or forward toward growth. Growth must be chosen again and again; fear must be overcome again and again.” – Abraham Maslow

“Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.” – Albert Einstein

“What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you want to make.” – Jane Goodall

“Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it, and eventually, the confidence will follow.” – Carrie Fisher.