Tag Archives: personal growth

22

Finding Your Limits

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Limit- a point or level beyond which something does not or may not extend or pass.

LimitWhat can you do in life? What can you achieve? What is the absolute limit of your potential? These questions we are asking ourselves at least subconsciously from our earliest moments of life. We perceive the answers that build this tapestry of our belief.

Woven into the fabric of this belief are our perceptions of how smart we are, how creative or how talented in a particular area we think we are. Mixed in there are all our perceived limits in every area of our lives. It is essential to realize that these images are just an illusion. We are only limited by our thinking and the beliefs we choose to give power to. Most people happily accept their limits and live their lives, never stretching beyond them. I urge you to look at what is limiting you in your life and make a conscious choice to see what lies beyond them. It begins with an awareness of your thoughts, words, and actions regarding your perception of your limits.

The Box

From the moment we are born, other people work to put us into a box. People who care about you can be just as limiting as those who dislike you. Crutches are given to us all the time, and we willingly accept them. They come in the form of excuses, “They are just not creative.” or “Nobody in this family is good at math.” or “That is a nice talent, but can you make a living at it?”  They built the box around us slowly, and most can’t see the world outside of it.

Other people have created this box of limits for us. We accepted their trusted opinion because they were our relatives, friends, teachers, community leaders, etc. The drive to be taken allows for this box of limits to grow all around you, and soon you believe there is no possibility outside of this prison that has been constructed all around you. But you are not limited.

To escape the box takes a change of thought. Become aware of the talents you possess and fabulous things you can achieve in all areas of your life. The limit of those accomplishments is in your mind and the actions you dare to take. Don’t let the thoughts of others and society limit you and what you try to do. There is more to life than working a job for hours to earn money. Thinking, talking, laughing, sharing, growing, improving, creating, and many other things are the actual value that life provides you. Get out of the box; don’t let people limit you. Find your actual boundaries and be the person you were born to be.

Challenges and Opportunities

Every challenge we face brings with it an opportunity. Many will look at a situation and see the limits that it gets, and the rare few will look at the circumstances life throws their way and see the potential for growth, success, and happiness that exists. The mindset of looking past the limits of your events is what separates those who are aware and those asleep at the wheel. It is always up to us to explore situations to see what is possible.

Of course, you can let circumstances defeat you and do nothing. But I urge you not to sit idly and complain about what is happening. Complaining builds a victim mentality, which will limit you in all areas of your life. See the opportunity, take action, and see what develops for you. Life is not an easy road because the easy way never produced anything worthwhile. Only through exercise can a body be designed. The same is true in all areas of life. Don’t let the perceived limitations of your circumstances stop you. You are the only person who can decide where your limits lie.

You Limit You

That leads us to the natural choice involved in our limits—your mind and what you choose to accept. Look at the box around your life. Is it stopping you from earning the money you want, having the relationship you want, or just enjoying life the way you want? Most people live their entire life and never contemplate in any natural way the limits they face, where they came from, and what they can do about them.

Bad childhoods, being miserable, being unintelligent, not having an opportunity, not knowing the right people, any physical restriction, or any other excuse you can think of are just that, excuses. We are only as healthy and prosperous as the weakest excuse we will accept. This limits people in all areas of life. Don’t limit yourself! Find the things you like to do and do them with passion and joy.

Focus your conscious thought on your limits today and why you see them the way you do. Where did they come from? What is beyond them? What actions can get you past them? Do this in thoughts, words, and efforts to reach beyond the limits you accept about yourself.

“Don’t limit a child to your learning, for he was born in another time.”~Rabindranath Tagore

“You can’t put a limit on anything. The more you dream, the farther you get.”~ Michael Phelps

You are in the driver’s seat of your life. Nobody else has the power to erase your dreams unless you let them. Our limits are never created outside of ourselves but on the inside in the world of our thoughts.

 

 

22

Forget the Judgement

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What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

For much of my life, I spent a lot of time worrying about what others thought about what I did to the point that I often would not do things I wanted because I was afraid of what others might think. That fear stopped me from doing silly, inconsequential, and big things alike. I would see a picture of people judging me and thinking poorly of me in my head.

When the thoughts in my head worried about the ideas in others, the results were a constant fear of showing my true self. There was a chance that someone might not like what I would be doing.

The problem with this thought pattern is that you are never actually able just to be you. People put a lot of pressure on themselves to be perfect, which is impossible to achieve. I have put most of this thought pattern behind me, which I now notice.

Doing What I Want

judgment defines you not others
Look inward before You Judge Someone and their behavior.

There is an impression that this question builds in your mind that if you were released from the disturbing thoughts of society, you would suddenly do things that were totally out of character. But I think that doing all of the things that are part of my personality without worrying about what anyone else thinks is the fun of life.

I am a thinker, and I enjoy reading and thinking and then writing my thoughts about what I learn and contemplate. I want the cafe’ and getting to know people. I like working out every day and not apologizing for the length of my workouts. All of these things I do and do not do any of them for the sake of what someone else might think would make my life unhappy. You have to be your best, and I like that person.

Truth about Freedom

The truth about freedom is I like the freedom to be myself and say, I don’t care about the judgments of others, but that has just meant that I can do the things I like to do without worry. These things haven’t changed much at all, but the perception I have of these activities and how others perceive them has. If someone has a problem with the way I live and my choices have a problem with themselves.

So I will read and learn about life and delve into why people are the way they are. If you read this site, you will see I share my thoughts freely and encourage a conscious positive vibe in everyone.    I will share my feelings if you ask. I don’t care if you agree because a challenge is an opportunity to teach and learn. All thoughts should be challenged so that they stand up as truths. If they don’t, you will move a step closer to finding the truth. So I haven’t started dressing differently or acting a whole lot differently, I don’t care what anyone else thinks about how I dress or how I work, and it feels fantastic.

now be yourself
Who else could you possibly be?

There are things I do now that I might not have had the courage to do before, and each one I recognize as a step forward, although I think for many people, they would be pretty small steps indeed.

Normal?

One of the most significant things that have arisen from this change of thought is that I judge others much less. I try not to judge at all. I have learned to appreciate the differences that each individual brings to the world, and the vibrant contrast allows for a broad spectrum of color in life. It is a much more exciting canvas that I see painted in front of me. I wouldn’t say I like the things everybody does, but I try to accept them as their choices, not mine. I’ll worry about my thoughts, words, and actions and let others worry about theirs.

This wide variety can be scary to some, but we should embrace it. Just as you accept each person for their unique ability, so will you be recognized as special and beautiful. I think there is a misconception that a “normal” state exists when the real normal is that you should be who you are and that, my friend, is good enough.

Some Quotes on Not Caring what others think

“The eyes of others our prisons; their thoughts our cages.” ― Virginia Woolf “

A dame that knows the ropes isn’t likely to get tied up.” ― Mae West

“You have no responsibility to live up to what other people think you ought to accomplish. I have no responsibility to be like they expect me to be. It’s their mistake, not my failing.” ― Richard P. Feynman

“Care about what other people think, and you will always be their prisoner.”—Lao Tzu

“Never dull your shine for somebody else.” ― Tyra Banks

“If being an egomaniac means I believe in what I do and in my art or music, then in that respect you can call me that… I believe in what I do, and I’ll say it.” ― John Lennon

“I do not care so much what I am to others as I care what I am to myself.” ― Michel de Montaigne

“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”— Dr. Seuss

“Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will. “― Suzy Kassem

“Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.”— Oscar Wilde

22

Seek Your Peace

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Seeking Peace

There are so many ways to improve your outlook on life that it is

impossible for me to list them all here for you, but in general, there are a few simple tips I can give you that have made my enjoyment of life increase exponentially.

These are not extremely difficult things to do; solving advanced math problems or rocket science is complicated; finding peace should be simple.

It requires you to honestly look at yourself and the situations that affect how you feel and choose to let events enhance your life, not harm it.

These are three simple practices I have implemented in my own life that have made a living a much more enjoyable experience, and I think you might too. I almost guarantee it. It is all up to you.   The steps are acceptance, forgiveness, and peace, and you are on your way to happiness if you want to be.

1. Acceptance is Not Approval

The first thing you have to be able to experience is the acceptance of all that has happened. is was difficult Acceptancefor me because I always believed that by saying I accept a situation, I simultaneously admit the status will never change, and acceptance is not that.

Acceptance does not mean approval, consent, permission, authorization, sanction, concurrence, agreement, compliance, sympathy, endorsement, confirmation, support, ratification, assistance, or even liking whatever it is you are accepting it is merely saying, “it is what it is, and what is, is what is.

Popeye believed the same thing, “I am what I am.” and so does Patriot Coach Bill Belichick when he analyzes a game, “It is what it is.” Until you choose to accept things as they are, realizing and identifying the situation accurately, you will never be able to develop a plan to overcome an obstacle and learn what you need to learn and grow from the experience.   Acceptance is the first step and the most important because you will never get to the ultimate destination if you never start a journey.

2. Forgiveness Will Set You Free

Step two in this search for self-discovery is forgiveness. F giving someone for doing something that hurt you or someone you care about can be very difficult to do because we all internalize things that happen to us and take them personally,

forgiveness
Forgive and Free Yourself

but to quote an ancient Chinese Proverb, “Anger is a hot rock that burns the one who holds it.”

To me, this means that the heat of anger,  disappointment, jealousy, whatever negative emotion you associate with somebody else’s actions, you have to forgive and let go to move on with your life.

I also have learned that you don’t have to make your forgiveness known to anyone other than yourself. You don’t have to have a ceremony, a rite of passage, or even talk to anybody. All you have to do is forgive whoever you have to in your heart, and you will find you are on your way to finding peace.

If you don’t believe me, try it.   Just think about a person you feel has hurt you, then accept whatever the situation is. Then forgive them for whatever they did, or you perceived them to do, truthfully and wholeheartedly. If you are sincere, you will start to feel relief almost immediately.

You can let all of the foolishness of life and the anger that you are carrying around because of the actions of others and experience growth, allowing becoming a better version of yourself. You can even forgive yourself, which is probably one of the first places you should start.

Whatever shortcomings you have had, mistakes you have made, dreams you left disappointed, goals you haven’t reached yet, whatever angers you about yourself, forgive yourself for being human, and accept what has happened.

You will find the road that leads you where you want to go will appear to you almost magically. Forgiveness is simple, but it is never easy because we tend to hang on to things and internalize them, and they become a part of who we are.

Then when you forgive them and let them go, you fight against it because these situations have become a part of our identity, and they have become who we are, rather than something that happened to us or something we did. Forgiving everyone is what I advocate, and moving on to a better place.

3. Peace  will Find You

Thirdly, you will find the third almost without any work if you follow these two things. It will come naturally to you, like an inevitable turn in the river you are riding on, and you will encounter peace.

With peace will come freedom from the thoughts you have been carrying around with you. It is simple as thinking: I accept that experience, forgive that experience, and am free. This is where positive thinking will start to emerge in your life.

It was explained to me that just thinking positive thoughts to exclude negative ideas is challenging because you have been having those negative thoughts all your life, whatever they are.

My parents didn’t pay enough attention to me. I am weak. I am always treated poorly in relationships. I am miserable because that’s all I deserve when you accept your thoughts as what they are and forgive them; these negative thoughts are not ignored but instead transformed into ideas of a positive nature. I have found that I am happy most of the time when this happens. Peace is just another word for experiencing inner happiness about who you are, where you have been, and going.

So give this process a try, accept a situation that has hurt you and all the people involved. Forgive t m. All people do crappy things because they are people, and it’s not personal, they are just trying to live their life, and you will find a feeling of peace and understanding. Accept yourself and others for who they are and move.

Quotes About Inner Peace:

“The self is not the individual body or mind, but rather that aspect deep inside each person that knows the truth.” – Swami Vishnu Devananda

“We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves.” – His Holiness the Dalai Lama

“If you let go a little, you will have a little peace. If you let out a lot, you will have a lot of peace. If you let  o completely, you will have complete peace.” – Ajahn Chan XX century Buddhist Monk

“Respond intelligently even to unintelligent treatment” – Lao Tzu.

“When there is light in the soul, there is beauty in the person.
There is harmony in the person when there is beauty in the house.
When there is harmony in the house, there is order in the nation.
When there is order in the nation, there is peace in the world.”-  Chinese Proverb.

“If you lose touch with nature you lose touch with humanity. If there’s no relationship with nature, then you become a killer; then you kill baby seals, whales, dolphins, and man either for gain, for “sport,” for food, or knowledge. Then, nature  is frightened of you, withdrawing its beauty.”-  Jiddu Krishnamurti

“To achieve the strength we need in living, an inner life must be lived apart from the world.
To wear the whole world as a loose garment is a key to serenity.
Loosen your hold on earth, its cares, and its worries.
Unclasp your hold on other people and material things.
Let go of resentments, they hurt only you, not the person, persons, or institutions you resent.
Relax your grip, and the tide of peace will flow in.
Live in today, not in regrets over what happened yesterday, not in the fear and apprehension of what tomorrow may bring.
The past is gone as a cloud of dust.
Tomorrow may never come.
We are faced with living just one day…today.
Try to relax, rejoice, and be glad in it!” – (Unknown Author) 

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.   – Marcus Aurelius (Roman Emperor)

“Whenever anyone has offended me, I try to raise my soul so high that the offense cannot reach me” – Rene Descartes.

“A man who is master of himself can mend a sorrow as he can invent a pleasure. I don’t want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to be them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them.” – Oscar Wild

“Out of clutter, find simplicity. From discord, find harmony. In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.” – Albert Einstein

“Nothing is either good, middle, or bad, but thinking makes it so” – William Shakespeare.

“Dwell as near as possible to the channel in which your life flows.” – Henry David Thoreau.

22

The Numbers

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challenges-make-life-interesting

Age is just a number. However, some numbers are much more intimidating than others, and turning 50 is one. It happened to me a few years ago and to a friend of mine just this week.

To me, at this milestone, I have conflicting feelings. I assume all people are the same. I have fears and insecurities about life, just as I did when I turned 40, 30, 20, or even 10. Hopefully, I have developed tools and learned lessons that have helped me positively navigate the aging process—embracing the experience. Reflection is one of the tools that I use to understand the value of an incident. To take that lesson into living my life every day.

Challenges

Life is designed to bring a series of challenges we all have to navigate. Each challenge presents us with choices. Choices challenges and choicesthat define our lives. A problem may overwhelm us, crush us, and destroy our confidence if we allow them to. However, there is always another choice. To seek the better version of ourselves and choose to rise and live our lives in a way that reflects the best version of the living. These choices we have been making from the beginning and will continue to build until we reach the inevitable end. The challenges we face and the choices we make about them will dictate the experience of our lives.

People tend to keep their most painful lessons to themselves. This secrecy is to keep up a perception that we are in control. Handling all events efficiently and with style. In Reality, all people are just making it up as they go. It is self-delusion, and a person believes they understand it all. There is always more, no matter how much one learns, observes, and understands. The vast undiscovered iceberg of knowledge is still floating toward us undiscovered. There is always something else to learn and more growth to achieve.

Growth

To be your best is the ultimate goal of life. Not to accumulate a large cache of material possessions but to become the best version of yourself. That is where the challenges come in. Without change, things become stagnant.

growth is constant
The opportunity for growth is constant.

Often we become so comfortable in life, just the prospect of change is tremendously scary.

Reflection and growth can only come when challenged and forced to take in new information and experiences. Life is a gift, and you need to grow to get the most out of it. The alternative is to shrink a little each day until your gs are challenging to remember and your passion has faded.

Fortunately, it is never too late to recapture the passion for your dream. Your creativity is still there, dormant underneath all of the routine, predictability, and conforming expectation behavior. It is just waiting for you to remember. The sad thing is that many will not remember, but you decide your destiny.

You choose your path and direction. You allow life’s experience to push you. Will you fight or flee? Will you stand proud or hide in shame? Only you can decide.

I have turned 50  and feel I am only at the beginning of things. I am ready for the growth and the challenge of life. I look forward to it, and I embrace it. Regardless of your age, I wonder how you face life.

“There must be a goal at every stage of life! There must be a goal!” – Maggie Kuhn

“Aging is not ‘lost youth’ but a new stage of opportunity and strength” – Betty Friedan

“This is a youth-oriented society, and the joke is on them because youth is a disease from which we all recover.” – Dorothy Fuldheim

“Anyone who keeps the ability to see beauty never grows old.” – Franz Kafka 

“You can only perceive real beauty in a person as they grow older.” -Anouk Aimee

 

21

Faith

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Please have a little faith it will all work out for good in the end.

It is easy to say you have faith in someone or something and quite a different thing actually to act on that faith.  The definition of faith is to have complete trust and confidence in someone or something.  Looking back on life, I know that a precious few people or things I have placed my faith in each day.  As life progresses, we are inundated with more and more experiences that hurt us and cause our trust to erode piece by piece.  But at the end of your life, you have to be willing to live in hope, or your life will be dominated by fear, and that will never lead to a happy and enjoyable experience.  We see things as undesirable, painful, and it is difficult not to take them personally. Things happen; we must file them away and deal with them.  It is our choice if we live a life of fear or continue to develop a life of faith.  All things will work out OK, we will be OK, and life knows what it is doing after all.  Sometimes having a little hope is all you have, and it can be the most valuable possession in the world.

Tough Times Come To Everyone

Difficult times and painful experiences are going to come into your life. That is a guarantee, and nobody in the world is exempt from them. We can all choose how we deal with them, but you, me, and all other people will face challenges.  Betrayal, lies, anger, loss are all a part of our experience.  I have often wondered why this is the case when things are so much more enjoyable when they are excellent and comfortable.  Why have we experienced a loss we couldn’t understand? Why put us through all of that?  Why give the good times if only to take them away immediately? It seems like God is just toying with us for no reason.  Unfortunately, the tough times provide suffering, and it is through this process, we can glean wisdom.

Imagine a life with no challenges.  There is nothing to push you to try something else, seek a deeper meaning, or search for understanding.  I don’t know a lot, but I know life is meant to be an experience of growth, or it is over. Faith in the ultimate ability to overcome your challenges, remember who you are, and bring that light to the world is the real challenge for you. Living in faith means to believe it will all work out in the end to the benefit of all, even if you can’t understand how right now. It is hard to see the edges, where it ends, and where the calm lies when you are inside the storm. All storms have an end; all tumult is followed by peace. Just as there will be challenges, there will be triumphs and good times.  Faith tells us this.

The Best Days

Having a little faith in the darkness that the dawn will eventually break is hard when you live in fear of what might happen next.  Living in fear causes people to harm others and themselves. When you live in doubt, you see all of the potential dangers of what might happen if things go wrong. It closes your eyes to the good, which might be right in front of you. Suppose you can put the fear aside and accept on faith that there is a lesson for you in the hard times.  One experience will propel you to greater heights in the future.

Have a little faith in the lesson you need to learn. If you look honestly at your challenges, growth results are an aspect. A plant grows when you add water, sunlight, and proper soil. So your mind becomes, and sometimes the fuel we need is unfavorable. Is it, though?  To be pushed can move you to a new level of activity and achievement. You may never have looked for answers to the questions resulting from your suffering.  Having gratitude for hard things is very difficult, but many of the most outstanding achievements in history occurred after a great tragedy.  Look at your account. How many accomplishments came after facing a challenge and taking the skills and motivation to move into a new stratosphere of accomplishment?

Faith is Real

The choice to hope that all things will work out in the end in the best manner possible is always the best.  We all have decisions to make, and as long as we are alive, there is hope and an opportunity to make a dream come into reality and achieve a goal. Suppose we can get out of the way of our fear of suffering.  This suffering is the very definition of courage, and it is through this act of faith; all of your goals will find their positive results.  One thing I know for sure, if you live in fear, live in doubt, treat others poorly, and carry no belief in yourself, nothing positive will result. These things are all a personal choice. What choice do you make today?  What lessons are you learning through the challenges you face? How has loss shaped you? Has it made you understand you have to have faith? Or has it made you fear more loss?

I urge you today to develop a sense of living in faith that all things will work out for good in the end if you let them.  Don’t live in the regrets of the past or in the anxiety of what might happen in the future. Live today with a bit of faith in yourself and the Universe that this cosmic play has much more good in it than it does evil, and seek to embrace it.

“Without faith, a man can do nothing; with it, all things are possible.” – Sir William Osler

“Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation.” – D. Elton Trueblood

“Faith is unseen but felt, faith is strengthened when we feel we have none; faith is hope when all seems lost.” – Catherine Pulsifer

“Breathe, and have faith that everything will work out for the best.”

“Your hardest times often lead to the greatest moments of your life. Keep the faith. It will all be worth it in the end.”

21

To Forgive

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forgiveness 99To live life is to be let down. Disappointment seems to come with the territory. We then have a few simple choices when things go wrong, and we can carry around the anger of being hurt or practice forgiveness and move on. Sometimes other people’s actions are so painful that it seems impossible to forgive like you will be letting the person who wronged you off the hook. That is the same attitude that keeps you suffering and under the control of an event or the actions of others for your entire life.  There are many benefits of forgiveness the will make your life a more enjoyable experience.  Freedom is one, and there are many benefits of forgiveness.

Your Health Will Be Better.

When you look around the internet for benefits of forgiveness, the Mayo Clinic offers a great many

Greater health and energy from forgiveness
More excellent health and energy from forgiveness

physical benefits the process of forgiving can provide. Letting go of the negative emotions surrounding any grudge-holding or hurt is not debatable. They include lower blood pressure, a lower risk of depression, decreased anxiety, improved relationships, better heart health, and a more robust immune system.

All of these were coming from the rational choice to forgive someone. The alternative is to hang on to the grudge and have all of the material things above become a problem, as in increased anxiety, higher blood pressure, more mediocre relationships, worse heart health, and weaker immune system. It seems like a no-brainer for your health to forgive others or yourself and let go of the negative emotions surrounding an event in your life. Your health will be better for it.

Buddha once said, “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”

Forgiveness Nurtures Growth

It doesn’t seem to matter if it is a relatively small event you can’t forgive someone or yourself for or a choose to growhuge mistake when you maintain the grudge. You are remaining stuck where you are.  Think about it, an event that has happened in the past exists in the past, and as long as your focus is on the past, that is where you will stay.  To forgive and let go of the anger will allow you to move forward with your life. The only way to become unstuck and start to grow is to forgive those we are angry with.

Events in the past are not going to change, and they are what they are. Only your attitude about them can change, and you have total control over them. The person who gets the benefit of your forgiveness is going to be you. You will find that you can create, be optimistic about the future, and leave the weight of the past behind you. You will be surprised how much you can do without all that extra weight of blame, anger, hatred, and lack of forgiveness weighing you down. You can begin to grow again. Without growth, life ceases to exist.

Nobody is Off The Hook

Forgiveness is not weighted. That is, there are no levels of forgiveness, depending on the wrong forgive1committed. You will still be weighed down, trapped by an event or person, and unable to grow until you decide to forgive.  Many people I talk to say that what was done to them was too awful, too terrible to be forgiven. When you forgive, you do not condone or make anything morally right. You permit yourself to leave the experience of the event behind you and to move forward. Nobody is let off the hook by your forgiveness except for you.  You never have to talk to a person to forgive them.

Forgiveness is a rational choice that you make, allowing you to direct your thoughts more positively. It will enable a person to create positive new memories and a life full of happiness and joy, rather than to be weighed down by the negative memory of an event or person from the path. All of the control in your life will move you and away from an adverse event.  You will become a more reliable, more powerful person when you practice forgiveness because forgiveness is proactive. Anger, resentment, grudges, and hate are all reactive.

“Forgiveness says you are given another chance to make a new beginning.”— Desmond Tutu

“There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.”— Bryant H. McGill

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.”— Mark Twain

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”— Lewis B. Smedes

21

The Courage

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We all have to walk down the dark corridors of our lives, and there are moments we need to find all the courage we have inside to keep moving forward even though fear is gripping our hearts. Courage is the ingredient that allows a person to take their next step, though they are afraid of what might happen. Freedom from fear shifts a person’s energy from the negative to the positive. Courage allows you to dismiss the opposing forces of doubt and fear and replace them with hope and expectation of something positive happening in your life.

You can choose to bring your courage into your conscious thought every day by recognizing the daily fears you face and still do what you have to anyway. Here are three significant concerns we all need to overcome at some point; 1. The anxiety of the future 2. fear of rejection 3. Fear of failure. With a shift in focus and awareness, we can deal with what scares us, and it starts with noticing your thoughts of fear and answering the question: Do I have the courage to face my nightmare?

Courage for the Future

Fear about the future is what many worries are based on. Somehow people believe that if they play out every nasty, negative, and painful scenario of what might happen in their mind, they will never be hurt or disappointed. Worry is negative energy that brings negative things into your thought process, the words you use with others, and, of course, the actions you take. Fear never brings anything good to anyone, and it robs you of the good things you have in your life right now. Isn’t this what anxieties of all kinds are based on? The future may have challenges in it, and those things will help you grow. Eventually, our death will come, and the ending of everything will ultimately happen. Worry won’t stop that. It just makes your experience of today far less enjoyable.

Put your worries away and focus on the positive things in your life right now. Enjoy the good things you have at this moment. Prepare for the future, as any responsible person would. But realize that whatever is coming your way is coming. There will be loss, sadness, and pain. There will also be joy, laughter, and great experiences. Have courage that you will be able to weather the negative, and the positive will be present in much larger quantities. Have courage about the future and the positive things it will bring to your life. There are no guarantees, so embrace the joy when it comes to you.

Courage about Rejection

People may reject you or something you do for many reasons, and the truth is, most have little or nothing to do with you. It is their past experiences, choices, and consciousness making those choices. Don’t take any of this personally. It is them, not you. Put your plan in action and do it in a way that makes you happy. Even though you may have lost someone or something you treasure, look for the good in the situation. It may not be easy to recognize, but it will be there.

Changing your perspective takes courage to do because there will always be naysayers and doubters. And often, the biggest doubter you will face will be in your head. Ignore their noise. People will come into your life who will discourage you. Make you doubt who you are and affect you negatively. If they put as much effort into pursuing their dreams as critical of others, they could accomplish anything. They are the definition of negative mediocrity. Give their opinions about all the attention they deserve. Non Have courage, try, create, do, go, find, build, and believe!

Fear of Failure

Now we come to what I think is the most common fear, and that is a failure. What is a failure but a label? We are trained in education to view breakdown as the worst result. Things are not always going to go perfectly. But it isn’t. If you are genuinely creating and reaching for something new, there is a real chance you aren’t going to get it right the first time. But each attempt at something provides information, experience, and skill. Those can work to a challenge, and the next time you will get a different result. The courage to ignore a negative view of failure and see how this situation provides an opportunity to grow, learn, and ultimately gain success. That is how it has worked throughout the history of man.

It takes real courage to face this challenge. Our society views anything but perfect results as a failure. There is little margin for error. Why is this? Could it be that if we encouraged thinking and fundamental knowledge, people would be less controllable? Individuals might develop ideas that would change things. Be brave and let your courage drive your process of learning. Not the expectations and judgments of narrow-minded small people. Give them all the regard they earn. They have no idea where you are going and what you can do. Unless you accept their narrative about you, it’s your choice to be more conscious of your courage.

Have Courage and Do It

Let your consciousness continually become aware that life is a little game. There is a beginning, a middle, and an end. We are all moving toward the inevitable, don’t waste your time in fear. Find your courage to make changes in your life that leads you toward living like your best self.

People fear change naturally, even if it is clearly for the better. Be brave and have the faith that it will work out in the end. Nobody can be sure where that end is, but having the courage and taking action will lead to a result. Find your courage today, and it all begins with a higher awareness of your thoughts, words, and activities. You can then learn, evaluate, grow, improve, and make better actions. You are eventually becoming and achieving what you want.

Courage- the ability to do something that frightens one.

We all have courage inside us that will allow us to achieve all of the great things we want to accomplish if we learn to use it.

“True courage is not the absence of fear—but the willingness to proceed despite it.”–Unknown.

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you are.”― E.E. Cummings Quotes On Courage.

“The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.”― Coco Chanel Quotes On Courage

“Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen.”― Winston S. Churchill.

 

21

Unexpected

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Unexpected– not expected or regarded as likely to happen.

UnexpectedIt seems like we spend so much of our lives planning. You are trying to put yourself in the best position to experience success in a career, a relationship, or life in general. Then out of the blue, the Universe conspires to present all of the ideal circumstances to show what you are looking for right on your doorstep. Sometimes it is the unexpected presence that leaves the most long-lasting impressions on us. Being appreciative of this type of uncertainty is where my consciousness is focused today. The sudden good fortune that exists for all of us in life is there. It all begins with an awareness of your thought, the corresponding emotions, the words that result, and the actions you take, which will define you. Look for the unexpected in your day.

Open Up to the Unexpected

Back to being human. People spend so much of their time orchestrating their lives to keep themselves safe. As long as everything falls in the circle unexpectedof their comfort and expectations, nothing will go wrong. They will be safe. Some people try to orchestrate their lives and the lives of their loved ones in this circle. They try to keep the unexpected out, and regimen and routine in your life. They are creating the perception of control. But it is only an illusion.

Life is going to come at you with the unexpected no matter how hard you try to plan, worry, or fret about all possible scenarios. There is nothing wrong with preparing for the future. That is common sense, but to be all out controlling about it will lead to some rude awakenings. Opening up to the fact that unexpected things will happen in your life will make them easier to deal with and allow you to reap their benefits. You can’t plan for some things, and when it happens, all you can control is your reaction to it. That is where the potential for growth lies. Be open to the unexpected.

The Unexpected Guest Makes the Best Company

Life is like a party with all the people we know about attending. Some of our favorites we choose to have individual conversations with. These people are unexpectedgreat, but often you don’t learn anything new about the world or yourself. You move through the people in life and know the jokes, conversations, and topics that will allow you to navigate through it all. Then the unexpected guest shows up.

In this conversation, where you have no form of reference and no history, real growth can come. These words can also provide you with the most excellent entertainment value as well. As new information and experiences flow into your life, you can’t help but grow, and growth and purpose are what this whole game of life is about. The unexpected guest in your life often makes the best company and leaves you with significant gains.

Life is Short Be Unexpected

The unexpected is not just an external influence. We all can become unpredictable. Take the initiative in your life to do something different or to surprise someone. Life is an experience full of the unexpected, and we never know when the ride will end. So it only makes sense to take this day and enjoy it to the best of your ability. Something unexpected might happen, and that will provide a choice to enjoy the result or not. Choose to enjoy it.

There is gratefulness that a wise person feels for every breath they get in this life. Because you never know when it is going to end. Every moment has a potential value for enjoyment. Even moments of grief and suffering can wake you up to appreciate other moments for what they are. Life is a strange journey full of unexpected twists and turns. Learn to embrace every moment the unexpected provides each of us. It starts with your thoughts of the day, the emotions that result, the words you use because of it, and the actions it leads you to take.

“Sometimes, the most scenic roads in life are the detours you didn’t mean to take.” ― Angela N. Blount

“The expected always happens until it doesn’t”

“I’m looking for the surprises, you know, and the unexpected moments of technology, the unexpected moments of musical creation.” 

 

21

A Problem

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Sometimes we forget how much control we have in our journey.

When I was growing up, I knew who I was and what I wanted to stand for. There were certain core principles in life I knew were “good,” and I wanted to practice, and there were things that were “bad,” and I wanted to stay away from those. Life changed that boy and clouded his judgment, making the lines of what was “good” and “bad” become cloudy in his mind. The programming I received through experience, peers, society, institutions, and family members made me think my original thoughts were wrong. I naturally valued honesty, kindness, fairness, truth, love, showing courage, and being the best person I could be.

Those things were not always looked at positively and fit in; I pushed much of my best self to the background to lie dormant for years. Until one day, I realized how unhappy I was with how life was going. Through a lot of soul searching, reading, and questioning, I began to realize that my choices were the problem. I had chosen to move from my authentic self to a person who wanted to “fit in.” That compromise cost me much, but it wasn’t too late. I could make conscious decisions about my priorities, which would allow me to return to the person I was as a child. That was a conscious choice and led to raising my consciousness about all aspects of life that will lead to growth. Here are some factors anyone can align themselves with to become their best self.

Finding Truth

Being truthful is difficult and often painful. The conscious choice to accept your truth will be one of the most freeing things you ever experience. What others will think of you stop many of us from expressing our realities to the world. Express your truth anyway. For me, it is about realizing there is a conscious choice in how we treat others and ourselves, and we make it every day. I like people, but I am uncomfortable in crowds. Unless I make a conscious effort, I am very judgmental of others. I am prone to be harmed by extending help to others. I have made bad relationship choices in my life.

Seeing reality for what it is and not through a lens of what things mean is truth. It will allow you to escape the expectations of others and embrace who you are and who you want to be. Most of us are living a lie created by our programming. To embrace who we are as honest and truthful. Embrace it with both arms.

Create Love in Your Life

Love is one of the healthiest things in the world. It is an emotion, but more importantly, love is a verb that dictates the positivism you bring into your life and the world around you. More than just a romantic feeling with one other, love is built in the way you interact with the world and feel about yourself in each moment. To become comfortable with who you are, where you are in life and where you want to go is the more significant aspect of love.

We live in a world that pushes us to be superficial in our thoughts and actions. Put those things aside and pursue what makes you feel positive about yourself, and others will allow the love inside you to shine out to others. Some will accept it; some are so negative they will run from it. Let them that is their choice; you can only choose to love for yourself. Deeper connections with other people can only happen when both parties are looking for them. Love is a verb, a compilation of your actions in life. Love who you are and be the best person you can be.

You Create Your Life

I think we dismiss the power we each have to create almost anything in our lives. All people can see something they want in their minds, from love to wealth to fame or whatever you might like to create for yourself. Yet, we let the same spirit that can help us make these dreams, push negative thoughts onto us, and stop us from creating anything of value. Test it out. Look at a time when you have an inspiring idea. You have about five minutes of positive excitement before you start the flood of thought, telling you why you can’t do what you dream.

It’s too hard. Too expensive. Unrealistic. Nobody would buy it. You don’t have the talent. Nothing you do ever turns outright. All of these things and worse will rise in your mind, and if not dismissed consciously, they will stop you from pursuing what you want. You have the power to choose the thoughts you want to focus on consciously. You can build the motivation and discipline needed to accomplish anything. It starts with aligning yourself with this power by acting on it every day. Do what you must to chase your dream. Your dream will soon be chasing you.

Pursue Conscious Growth

It is a simple plan to find the principles that resonate with you and be true to them in your life. If they are absolute truth, love, power, unity, robustness, courage, and intelligence, then your life will take off in the direction you choose. If you decide to ignore these things and consciously or unconsciously select selfish, negative thoughts that do not represent your best self, life will be far less enjoyable.

I know because I have allowed the unconscious selfishness of my thought to run my life for too long. When I focus on the truth of my life and what I need to create to find the essential things of value and produce practical actions and show love to myself and the world, my life is a pretty great place to be.

“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.” Albert Einstein

“Consciousness is the stone that creates the waves in a sea of nothing.” Richard Gerber

“Through consciousness, our minds have the power to change our planet and ourselves. It is time we heed the wisdom of the ancient indigenous people and channel our consciousness and spirit to tend the garden and not destroy it.” Bruce Lipton

“Consciousness is only possible through change; change is only possible through movement.” Aldous Huxley

“There is no birth of consciousness without pain.” Carl Jung

 The Problem

21

Improve Daily

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My goal is to establish a positive focus every morning by focusing on a positive word or phrase. There are enough negative influences in the world, and I believe that we can improve our emotions, words, and actions and make the world a better place through a conscious direction of thought. Each of us has the opportunity to be more positive.

Improving It

We are all born into this world with some abilities. Some excel at academics, others find their niche in physical things, and others excel at artistic dreams. As we get older and move through our lives in all things, we are getting better or getting worse. There is no middle ground; we only stay the same for a brief moment. The great thing is that to seek to make ourselves better at anything is entirely in our control. The effort that we decide to dedicate to something will allow us to grow and improve at whatever skill, talent, or aspect of our lives we choose to develop. It begins with creating a positive thought in your head about improvement and then taking actions based on those thoughts.

Don’t Rely On Talent.

We are all born with some talents, and it can become human nature to rely on that talent as we develop through life. If you do this, you will most likely experience initial success because of your natural ability, but it will not last if you don’t develop what you have. Others with less initial talent take it upon themselves to do the work to become better, and if you don’t follow suit, soon you will be looking up, wondering what happened. Don’t rely on your talent. If you love whatever you are doing, look for ways to improve yourself at it.

I am finding a never-ending well of improvement available in all areas that I am interested in pursuing. Relationships, exercise, writing, speaking, and helping others, there are many miles of development out there for me to follow. It is easy to relax and think that you know all you need to know, and then you realize one day you did not, and it is at that moment we push ourselves to grow and become better. Be proactive with your efforts, and continually look for ways to improve all things that matter to you.

Developing a Growth Mindset

The barrier we often face has a mindset that tells us that we should know it all. It comes from the programming of life and a fear of failure. We have all failed at something in our lives, and it doesn’t feel right. But if you look at it honestly, most of the great successes in the history of the world have been created out of initial failure. Don’t look at a loss as a personal indictment of your talent or worthiness. When you succeed, it is more than likely going to be the lessons you learned in your initial failure that will help to guide you.

When you look at your life as a continual opportunity to grow, you take the defeats a little lighter and see the option for better things in the future. There will be many opportunities to grow as a person in all areas of your life. As you develop the skill of improvement, your confidence will grow, and you will be on your way to becoming your best self. Development is just another word for cultivating, and if you are not growing, you are dying.

Where Are YOU?

The challenge for all of us is to evaluate just where we are in any situation. What are the things we are doing well? Where can improvement come from? What actions can you take today to get you there? It can exist in any aspect of your life, financial, physical, relationships, career, family, spiritually, or any other part of your life. You can think of that holds within it a desire for you to improve and become better than you are right now.

Then it is up to you to take action. It can be intimidating and challenging to take action because we add too many exterior thoughts to our situations. We are worried about how something looks or what others will think. In the end, the only person you have to impress or get yourself into is you and you alone. So do what you have to do to improve in all aspects of your life that matter to you. We are all ever-evolving beings, and the choices we make in improvement determine what the result will be.

Look at your life and state where you are, and then create a plan of action to improve in that area. Create and write down goals of achievement for yourself in those areas. Then take action and evaluate what happens. If you succeed and become better, great!! If you don’t assess where you are and what will give you the chance to achieve the next time. In this process, you will not be able to help find improvement, which is what life is all about.

“To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.” ~Winston Churchill

We are seeking ways to improve every day to allow you to become the best version of yourself.

“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always be where you’ve always been.”

“You’re either green and growing, or you’re ripe and rotting.” —John Addison.