Tag Archives: Things Change

22

Change Leads to Growth for You and Me

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It should be a habit we all have not to get too comfortable with the way things are nowadays. Change is on the horizon.   If things are going well in life, you had better buckle up because life will send some challenges your way.  On the right side, if things are in a difficult place in your life, then good news for you, they will be changing soon.  We have no idea if our life circumstances will improve our experience or increase the volume of our suffering. But you can count that things will keep moving along the change timeline. Here are a few things to remember as you move through your day.

Change Happens

There are two types of people in the world regarding change. The first group holds on so tightly to how things are that they can’t imagine anything changing in life for the better. So when the inevitable changes come, they let them roll over them. Like being in a box slowly filling with water, and rather than leaving, they say right where they are, even with certain evidence things have changed for the worse.  It may be they just can’t let go of the past or wish things would never change. They stay in that catastrophic situation. It can happen in business, a relationship, or any other area of life.

The second type expects the change to come because it will.  These changes develop the skill of anticipating what will happen next. Even if they are wrong, they will still be ready for the changes that come their way.  They will be able to treat an avalanche like a friendly snowstorm because they know that with change comes opportunity, and opportunity brings the ability to make your dreams, ambitions, and goals jump to life.  You must embrace that change will happen, and life will move on. You might as well enjoy it because it beats the alternative.

Shifts in Life

Shifts in life can be hard when they bring changes you don’t necessarily want to experience—losing a job or the end of a relationship or something along those lines. But when you know change is coming, and it will happen, you can start to monitor situations to make solid guesses where the change is needed.  Maybe you can be proactive and bring about changes that will help circumstances or make your life or relationships more prosperous and fulfilling.  Recognize when a situation is getting stale and move on from it because it will eventually move on from you.

Then learn to adapt to change quickly. Let go of your attachments to the past and how things were and embrace the new stuff change has brought you in life.  It may seem like a weak trade-off sometimes, but at others, it will be a real bargain because the depth and quality of your experience will improve. Whenever something or someone leaves your life, they leave a space for something or someone else to enter. Growth does not randomly push you here or there. It will help you toward being the person you should be.  Move with it and embrace it.  People grow and change, things get old, and often, they break.  Roll with it and accept it.

Enjoy all the moments.

Savor the adventure and enjoy the new experiences coming into your life. You can’t get too comfortable with the situation. It may seem stable, or it may last for years. Maybe you have developed solid daily routines to help maintain things, but if you pay attention, you will see small cracks develop over time in your routine, and slowly, the buildings of your life will start to fall.  It is not a matter of if; it is a matter of when.  You can try to be proactive and create change the way you would like life to be, and sometimes that will work, but most often, things will change on their own and move in the way that suits life the best.

Don’t fight it because when you deny something happening, you create suffering for yourself. Please take a moment, with the past well, be grateful for it, and then let it go because there is so much to be thankful for right now and in the future.  Be ready to change and change quickly again and again.  You might as well learn to enjoy it and become an expert.  You will never be too comfortable, but you can always find joy, happiness, and fulfillment if you learn to adjust to the shifting sands of change.

“What do we need to let go of, and what do we need to move on to?”

“The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude” -Oprah Winfrey.

“Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” -Leo Tolstoy.

“The measure of intelligence is the ability to change” -Albert Einstein

 

22

Put The Past Behind You

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Life is a strange play. We move through many of our days, never thinking things could be any different. But things are always in a constant state of flux, for the one constant we experience on a minute-to-minute basis is change. It washes over our lives in inevitable portions, perhaps not wanted, but it still comes anyway. When things are not so pleasant, there is hope that changes will bring relief from what you are experiencing today. When things are going well, we hide from change because it will ruin all of our current conquests and the kingdoms we have built.

For me, the last year was an experience in the latter. Things changed for the worse as people I relied on left my life seemingly complete proportions. There was nothing I could do, and I have spent the past months trying to pick up the pieces that used to be me and see where they fit. The feeling of significant loss is a form of suffering, and I can be aware that I had built too many attachments to the way things were. Perhaps too much trust too soon in some people. I have spent too much time looking at the past and wishing things would magically snap back to where they were a year ago. But that hope is holding me back from moving forward into whatever the following stages of my life will bring, which can be equally good if you allow them to happen. Loss is still something you need to grieve, which I have been doing lately.

Shutting Doors

When you look at all the cycles in your life, it can be challenging to find the courage within yourself to shut the door at that time in your life. Even if it was painful, disappointing, or negative, there are positive things about people and experiences you might not want to let go of. So you leave the door open just a sliver looking for the memory of that good thing to open the door and walk back into your life. But it will not and the focus you spend looking toward that door, hoping, is not paying attention to the other entries you may be able to open, behind which great things lie.

Who knows what will be hiding behind the next door that opens. It could be great; it could be just ok. Life doesn’t often allow us to choose, and we can only decide our reactions to and actions once they are open. The only thing you can be sure of is that doors will continue to open for you as long as you are alive and functioning. To End, a chapter of your life on your terms can be next to impossible, but how you accept an ending is always up to you. To fight against it is the greatest form of suffering—resistance to the reality of your life.

Be The Force of Change

Each moment presents us with choices, to do what we always have, to believe as we have always believed, or to make a conscious decision to start to think about something else different from the past. In my experience, life provides us with cycles of life that serve to offer us lessons about how to live but, more importantly, about who we are. You can be proactive in your choices of dealing with change by deciding exactly how the end of your chapters will play out for you.

If you seek out the things that need to change and then take positive steps in the direction you want, you initiate the change in your life and create the action. In this way, you are being the hammer of change and involved in just what new things enter and old things end. My experience is that life will reward this type of situation with answers, knowledge, and clarity about your vision of where you can go and the joy you can experience. The hardest part of initiating change is the fear that it won’t work out. But it always does, in its inevitable conclusion. Life will work out if you let it and are willing to accept what comes your way. Only through acceptance can you thoroughly move forward.

Leave the Past

The bottom line in life is that you have to leave the past behind you and live in the present as best you can to make the future the best possible. The people who seem to live best are the ones who can recognize an ending, take a bow, let the audience applaud, and allow the curtain to close. Then take the makeup off, remove their costume and leave the theatre, moving into the next play of their life.

To continually relive old plays is a trap of mediocrity. Each stage we perform in life provides a purpose, and you should never forget the lessons, but do not try to live there. It will only stop you from moving forward. Leave your life moments that have finished where they are and move forward into a great new day. These are easy thoughts to think about but much more difficult in actions taken. Our minds connect to people and things. It is hard to let them go because it is painful when seemingly tangible things turn to dust and leave us. We need to be able to understand why. With the seeming hope, we can avoid painful losses in the future. Perhaps we can make the pain less, but I think pain comes with a purpose and the lessons we learn through it are lasting and valuable as long as you don’t let them make you bitter. Allow them to make you better!!!

“The truth is unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”  Steve Maraboli

“Forget what hurt you, but never forget what it taught you.”–  Shannon L. Alder.

“If you want to fly in the sky, you need to leave the earth. If you want to move forward, you need to let go the past that drags you down.”   Amit Ray

“In the process of letting go, you will lose many things from the past, but you will find yourself.”  –Deepak Chopra

 

22

Have Faith and Move On

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What Appears to Be the End is Only a New Beginning

It is hard to let go of things that have ended, one of the most difficult lessons you can learn is all things have a shelf life, and when it is time to what appears to be the end may only be a new beginningmove on, you need to be able to do this with faith. Understanding what you are moving toward is a piece of the puzzle you will need to achieve dreams and have positive things happen for you.

Relationships end, jobs are lost, people relocate, loss occurs, and even though there will be a natural pain coming with these experiences, it is a normal part of the grieving process. It isn’t easy, but it is part of being human.

Many people, including myself, have had issues moving on when a loss occurs. Even though it is obvious the time is ripe for change, new and exciting things are on the horizon. It is human nature to look back at the idealized safety we created in the past instead of moving with courage into a future, allowing you to chase and realize all of your dreams.

Moving led to new beginnings

Moving can be a traumatic experience for anyone, especially when you are a kid. I moved when I was 1, and at the time, I thought it was the biggest tragedy a person could experience. I had a great group of friends I had known all my life, and I knew where I fit in. I was comfortable and happy. Moving was traumatic. I had to deal with people who didn’t know me, and

beautiful reflection
Let Go And Begin Anew

might not like me. There was a lot of initial trauma, and I spent a lot of time worrying about what I was missing out on in life. Still, eventually, as I pushed through the new situation, I made some new friends and had experiences that I would never have had, both positive and negative, that led to growth.

Left to my own choices, I would have taken the most accessible road and missed some great things I have found. Everything in my life has led to growth, allowing me to evolve, and I learned valuable lessons. There was a lot of Idealizing of the past, but there is no way you can argue with your current reality.

Death and Dying

Experiencing a loss of a loved one is difficult to deal with, and nobody would ever characterize it as a good thing. Still, it’s my experience that you can gain something positive from this experience. Perhaps a better appreciation of the relationships you still have in your life or a greater awareness of the world around you. If you think of those who have passed with love, they are always with you. If they are inside your heart, mind, and spirit, a part of them is still alive.

Maybe the lessons that the loved one passed on left with you are lasting things. For myself, everyone whom I have lost has left a positive impact on my life. I am eternally grateful for the gifts they gave me. There were examples of how to live or how to treat other people guiding me through my life. I miss them all. I appreciate them all, they didn’t want to go, but it was their time. Cherish all who matter to you and treat everyone with kindness and dignity.

Losing a Job

When it comes to losing jobs, many have come and gone in my life. Some I liked and was sorry to see them go. Others not so much. In some cases it

starting over not the end
Starting Over Is OK

seemed like the end of the world when the job ended. In retrospect, I can always see the positive that came out of a seemingly negative situation. It could be that it was personal growth or a better experience that allowed me to be happier as a person.

It can be devastating as you get older to start over, but what a great gift it can be to allow you to grow and find what will make you happy. My experience is that the real problems come when you spend your time worrying about the past instead of addressing today. As traumatic as losing a job can be, a job does not define who you are, and your life isn’t ended because you lost a job. Change is life. I have always chosen life.

Relationships Ending

Relationships, unfortunately, end at some point (sometimes). People move, things change, priorities differ, and unexplained cruelness. These lessons are hard to deal with, and these can be with friends, coworkers, or in intimate relationships. All relationships have a cycle, and it is just some are larger and longer than others. If you look at the entire board of life, all relationships eventually end—even the most reliable end with one of the participants’ death.

Every person who comes into your life is there for a reason and often teaches you something. There are friendships I have had that have been lifelong. Some relationships lasted for a few years or even a shorter time. I appreciate them because I have learned a lot from everybody I have ever met. Even those I wish never happened because of the pain they caused brought learning experiences to me. Although sorrow was the teacher, they have made me stronger and hopefully a bit wiser.

Sometimes the lesson was how not to behave or what not to do, but most often, the experience is about how you can grow as a person. Letting go and appreciating the lessons you learned becomes more complicated when emotions are involved. Love is one of the world’s best feelings, but the fear of losing love has led to many personal tragedies. Time is the only cure for love because eventually, everyone gets the lesson and appreciates the great things that love has given them. Ultimately, you have only two choices, learn something or be miserable. Which is a better way to go through life?

The next time you face an apparent ending, take a moment and attempt to add some perspective to the situation. Once you get past the fear of losing something, you may find a silver lining if you allow it to work in your life. Look at what you learned and gained in wisdom and experience. Take that lesson with you into the future, and appreciate those giving you something positive daily. Value the experiences of life, and don’t be afraid of the changes inevitably coming your way. You have changed, life has changed, and everything will change again before you finish with this ride. Embrace all the good moments you have and the people you spend them with.

“You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing that we call ‘failure’ is not the falling, but the staying down.” —Mary Pickford

“Nothing in the universe can stop you from letting go and starting over.” —Guy Finley

“The beginning is always today.” —Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley

“It is never too late to be what you might have been.” —George Eliot

 

Life

People and Change

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Daily Positive Thought Project-  People and Change

One of the most consistent forces in the world is change. It is an always working force that is mending and pushing everything in the world.

https://youtu.be/Gz28hWhTwkA

Why is Change so difficult?

Change is difficult because either events are going great and we don’t want them to change into something else.  Or even if the changes we experience are going to be good,  it is our instinct to resist because deep down we are afraid that a change may make things worse.  So any change is initially resisted.

What your goals have to do with it?

Look at your goals in a career, relationship, or any other aspect of life. if they don’t include the things that are currently in your life then you can’t be afraid when life starts moving you in a different direction.

All of your goals and dreams will be found by trying something new and by accepting the changes that come into your life.

Change all Around YOU

Since change is happening all around you and to you at every moment. It would make sense to create a plan to try to benefit from this process. Rather than be an object helplessly tossed around by the waves of change, it makes sense to have a plan to deal with change and ride those waves. The waves are coming, you will change, life will change. It is your choice to grow or not from the experience.

Each change that is new will teach you a skill and allow you to become a better more well-rounded person. Accepting change will allow us to grow.