Tag Archives: Wise Ass

Overcome Failure

Which is worse, failing or never trying?

Nobody in their right mind would ever set out to fail because accomplishment is what people have been programmed to strive for. Yet, I look at our society, and I see a significant fear of failure in the eyes of most.  It has been bred from our earliest school days, “Do what we tell you and succeed,” “Never try something your not sure of, or you might fail.”  I think that history is full of people who have seen their share of disappointment and failure. Yet, these initial setbacks worked as a springboard to future success.  Failure is never fatal. Quitting is. Why is it that our educational systems seem to fear failure so?

A Harsh but Effective Teacher

learning from failure
At First You May Fall

Failure is a word that has negative connotations attached to it.  Nobody wants to be seen as a failure, associated with a failure, or even admit that they have experienced failure.

The perception of being a failure can harm different parts of our society, from stock market prices to the power of a celebrity at the box office.  Being a winner is preferable to being a loser. Yet, it is a fact that sometimes we all lose.

However, if you spend a little time looking at the lessons that you learned over the expanse of your life, you probably learned a lot more from the losses you experienced than from any other teacher you have ever had.  Failure is not fun to experience, but learning to deal with it and rise above it is one of the most valuable tools you will ever acquire.

Failing Can Open Doors of Opportunity

Once you learn this lesson, no goal is too far from your

finding success in failure
But You May Find Inspiration

reach.  Once you take ownership of what has happened and recognize why you fell short, you can take steps to continue working to achieve that goal. Often your ultimate success was driven by that initial faltering attempt.

One of the best things about becoming involved in athletics as a child is learning how to overcome setbacks in a controlled environment, learning valuable life lessons safely. These lessons are directly applicable to life. You will not always get the job, sometimes there is criticism of your work, and you don’t always win.

If you keep striving to win, though, and you evaluate your shortcomings honestly, then a person can overcome almost any failure and find success in the end.  That success can extend to any part of your life.

Why Are We So Afraid?

Thomas Edison quote on failureIt seems like today and parents are so involved in their kids’ lives that often, children are not allowed the freedom to fail at anything.

Either because they never want their kids to feel bad, or the parents are living vicariously through the accomplishments of their young ones.

Either way, kids are often taught that everyone is a winner and participate in non-competitive games, which sends an unrealistic life lesson because life is not that way.

Life has a way of testing you and finding out what you are made of.  Life is a game that you can’t win, you can only play it, and a healthy part of it is that sometimes things will not work out for you.

I would think that if I had never understood this that the first time failure came to me, I might have a nervous breakdown and never recover.  Yet, the hope of accomplishment and greatness keeps people marching forward, despite the risks of failure and the pain involved in not getting what you want.

If you work toward a goal, then you will have an opportunity to achieve that goal.

Give It A Shot, Then At Least You Know

When it comes never to try, you will avoid experiencing this failure, but you will also never learn the lessons that failure inevitably teaches you.  All things are not accomplished quickly, but if we persevere, we can achieve almost anything.

failure is not final
Great thought!

Never trying is way worse than failure. You will never know your capabilities unless you test yourself.

You will never improve physically, mentally, or spiritually unless you push yourself a little.  When you push yourself, sometimes you fail.

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get back to it. Learning this lesson will be one of the valuable experiences you will have.  And at least you will know, definitively once and for all, what you are capable of.   You are a great human soul with unlimited potential and effort, and fearless acceptance of the consequences will take you there.

Which is worse, failing or never trying?

 

30 Questions that Changed the Way I Think About the World

30 day challenges
The First of Many I Hope

by Jonathan Hilton

Have you ever seen the focus of your life change in thirty days? This is the experience that I have had over the last month as I have looked to improve my writing skill and myself, as a person as well.

This is an evaluation of my project to answer one question each day for thirty days, and to work on putting more of myself into my writing for the purpose of being more honest and open about the things I write about.

The beginning of this project

It began with a conversation with a collaborator who is a great writer and I was wishing that I was more honest in my writing; it was the conversation that led me to see this video on YouTube about this guy who undertook thirty day challenges to work on things he needs to work on.  Almost immediately I came across a list of “30 Questions That Will Change the Way you think about the world.”  The fact that there weren’t 35, 25 or 50

30 day challenges the beginning
The beginning of any journey starts with one small step.

questions, led me to believe that this was the project for me.

The rules I developed on the fly, but stuck to them until the end of the project, because I need rules apparently.

Rule #1 – had to answer a question each day and it had to be at least 300 words.  Many I could have answered in a sentence, but that wouldn’t have helped develop my thoughts.

Rule #2- I had to share my answers on Facebook, so that someone could read them if they wanted to. This really kept me more diligent and serious; I avoided some wise ass answers, because someone might read it.

Rule # 3- Much like fight club, I couldn’t talk about what I was doing.  I posted each question on FB every day, mostly to get some ideas for the days when I was low on creativity.  I was interested by the responses, and the different people they came from. I really appreciated the responses from everyone even if there was only one time; I read them all and appreciated it greatly.

I also published my answers on my website www.jonathanhilton.com and they are all there if you check the categories, Thirty Questions will bring them all up.

What Was the Goal of this project?

growth from contemplation
Answering from the heart was key

The goal of the project was more honesty and putting more of myself into my writing, which I thought was a weakness in my overall writing, it is difficult to put personal things out there, what you believe, what you think, but I think that if you never overcome this, you will be untrue to yourself the rest of your life, so that was the motivation. Most importantly I wanted to be able to write from a place that I didn’t care if someone liked it or not. That it was my answer and that would have to be good enough.

When someone asked me what the questions were about, I told them, if they wanted to know my answer, I directed them to my website.  Other than that I simply posted a question in the morning and then answered it on my website.  I never looked at the next question until the current question was answered.

What Did I Learn?

new person
we are all trying to remember who we are.

The first thing I learned was that my philosophy is developing and that I have a lot of consistency in what I believe in. What I have been working on personally has pervaded my thought and I believe that I have a great start.

Secondly when you ask one question and find an answer to that question, there are always going to be more questions that result from thought and that is ok.  The questions were answered and there were always a bunch more that cropped up.

Third, that there are different answers to questions, everyone has a different perspective and opinion and that is ok. All you can do is be open minded, yet faithful to what has been proven to you.

There are a lot of good people in the world and many have been asking themselves questions as well. Others are going to look for their answers in other places and find different behaviors satisfy them and they will find what they need to find in their answers, they may not have the same answers as you.

What Surprised Me?

There have been several neat relationships that have developed through the process of asking questions. Some people that I hadn’t heard from in years were prompted to contact me and see what the heck I was doing.  Even with people I see every day it gave me a chance to not only have an opinion but support it and fight for it.  My understanding of people is definitely higher, and my understanding of myself really was a surprise.

The many responses I got from such a wide range of people, some serious and some extremely funny, some sad, some just plain old sincere.

personal growth
Success, Success, Success

The most surprising thing was the freedom that came from just practicing the power of action into this thought process.  Creating and producing something that was completely of my own, based on what I believe is liberating. Many people have opinions on everything, but never publish them or have to stand by them which allows for a waffling on the beliefs. I believe that through answering these questions, my thoughts are there to be agreed with disagreed with defended or adjusted as they should be.  The biggest surprise was the power of the simple action on my own creativity and understanding of myself and others.

Was it a success?

I think by any measure the process was a success, the questions did actually change the way I looked at the world, and understood other people, so that awareness led to growth, and growing is a good thing.  I encourage anyone who has something that they want to work on to adopt a thirty day challenge of your own.  You will be surprised how it changes the way you look at the world, it definitely changed my perception of the world and those in it.

I definitely have written from the place inside me that does not care what anyone thinks about what I think or write, which is a major victory for my own self development. I think that if I can do that then everything else will be easy.

What is Next?

Well it is inevitable that one action is going to lead to another, so there are bound to be more of these 30 day challenges, in all areas of my life, in places that I feel I need personal work on.  So branching this type of growth out into other aspects of my life is definitely going to be a goal for me.  Taking more action to find what I am looking for.

 Here is a complete list of the questions with links to my answers. 

 

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