Monthly Archives: August 2021

21

Accepting New Beginnings

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moving-on-doesnt-mean-you-forget-about-thingsThere is nothing as exciting as a new beginning.  Reading yesterday, I came across this theme that is often a problem for me and many others. Endings are hard.  All things in the history of the world have had a beginning, a middle, and an end. That is the way of all things.  Often, when the end is harsh, a lingering regret remains, which does not allow a person to let go and move forward. The item you can be sure of is that right now, whatever is happening in your life is changing in some way and moving closer to its inevitable end.  We should be grateful in many ways because, without endings, there would be no new beginnings.

Painful Endings

I have experienced some endings in the job world that have been very difficult and painful. Some have looked to the past with longing and wished I could go ending 3back to the security of that situation or the parts of the job that I enjoyed.  However, looking into the past only brought sadness and regret.  Like many endings, there is no way to move onto something else that perhaps will provide you with greater enjoyment and fulfillment current situation is ended.   Every new beginning comes from an ending of something.

Accepting this can be difficult if it involves a relationship or even death because the emotions around these events will never seem optimistic in any way.  Yet if you analyze the situation, there is a simple choice for you to accept what has happened and move on with your life or to refuse to accept it and live in a past of regret and unhappiness. The choice is always yours.

Tough Relationships

When it comes to relationships, imperfect endings can moving on 2provide you with the learning experiences needed to propel you toward the person who can fulfill your needs.  It is a matter of perspective. That relationship ended because it lacked in some way. There was something that wasn’t fulfilling or favorable for you.

If you knew that within a day,  the person who would fulfill every one of your needs was going to enter your life, would you be all that sad?

In effect, you are holding on to an unfulfilled past at the expense of a complete future.  We often lack the perspective we are in life right now, feeling pain and just trying to survive.  If we could rise above life and look down and observe our paths and the next steps in front of us, we would be much more accepting of the change.  All things in life are generally working toward your greatest good, and fear makes us address things any other way.

Hard Times

We are afraid of the hard times in life because they are not fun to go through, and they hurt and are painful. Yet without these moments of challenge, many people would lack the depth and character that will make them the people they are destined to be.  Perhaps a  perspective needed to be adjusted, or a belief required to be changed to reach their full potential.

Not everything in life will work out how you want it to, but it will give you something that you needed to know to reach your full potential.  It is a fact that no matter what situation you are currently in, it beginnings 4will pass one day and cease to exist. It may be in a day or many years, but even the hardest of times will end and fade into memory. They will leave scars, but those scars will help build the character that will allow you to be the best person you can be if you adhere to their lessons.

Endings can be painful, but there is an excitement of a new beginning that will provide each person with a glimmer of hope in their heart that a dream may come true because of this endeavor. A person will never know unless they dare to accept the ending and the strength to take the step into the future.

21

Creative

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Create-bring (something) into existence.

What is Creativity?

Create The ability to bring things into existence that previously didn’t exist is an awesome power and allows an individual to enjoy life and the experiences it brings. When you create, the energy produced is positive and contagious.  All people have a force in themselves that yearns to create. It could be to create paintings, writing, thought, woodwork, plays, songs, or any other of a billion different things. When you have a question about your direction in life, look to create, and it will guide you.  Raise your consciousness today by looking at how you create in thoughts, words, and actions.  (See Video)

The Concept of Creativity

The ability to create allows people to connect their mind, body, and spirit in one activity. Most religions see creativity as a gift from God, and to use that gift will honor all involved. The result doesn’t matter, and it is the process of bringing something into existence that

Createpreviously didn’t exist that is powerful, memorable, and self-supportive.  There is a creator in all of us looking for a way out, and that can only come through making the conscious choice to free our creativity.

Choosing to let your ability to create lie dormant will decrease the enjoyment you have in life. Creativity is a joy we give to ourselves and the world. Try not to waste that gift, and you never know what your creations might lead to. Fame? Fortune? Connections? Whatever it is, the world will be better for it. Your method and inventions may open ideas for others and solve problems in ways you never thought of before.

Characteristics of Creativity

There are several simple things a person can do to create more easily. One of the most effective is to read. Find books that challenge you and teach you something. A mind that expands will never regress again.  Once you become aware of new thoughts in your existence, they often lead you to creative action. The more depth in your knowledge, the bigger the field of creativity you have to play on.  Read, think, expand your mind, Createand read again.

Never be afraid to lose yourself in a task of creativity. When the time doesn’t matter, and you are focused on the creation. It is in these moments that we find the answers to who we are.  The concentration is away from the chatter of thoughts existing in our minds, creating something that never existed before. You are this powerful creator. Once the channel is open, higher and grander creative forces will build in you.  Find out where your creative limits lie if you have any!

Today raise your awareness of what you are creating in all areas of your life. In your thoughts, think of what you would like to develop and how you will bring it into reality. In your words, look for ways to express your desire to create and encourage that desire in others.  In your actions, create something.  Make time to do this today.  The desire to develop connects you to your soul and allows you to enjoy the experience of life. Paint, write, sculpt, build, dance, act, sing, play, do what your soul guides you to do, and answers will come to you.

Concepts of Creativity

Every soul has the power to create something that can only come from them, so find it and create it and release it to the world. It is your duty to live.

If, at first, the idea is not absurd, then there is no hope for it. ~Albert Einstein

Creativity requires the courage to let go of certainties. ~Erich Fromm

The chief enemy of creativity is good sense. ~Pablo Picasso

There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life. ~Sophia Loren

An essential aspect of creativity is not being afraid to fail. ~Edwin Land

Creativity is never a waste of time !!

 

21

Motivational

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Motivational thoughts
When life gets you down, take action.

Motivational Thoughts

If you are feeling like you are stuck in a rut or that life doesn’t offer you any real surprises on your journey, you need some motivational thoughts to inspire you.  You can choose to do things that will allow you to feel a sense of wonder again and help you get a little more enjoyment in your life.

Some thoughts to start with

  1. Make a list of six things you could do this evening.  Then roll a dice and let the fates decide your activity!
  2. Find somebody else on the Internet with the same name as you, get in touch and try to make a new friend. There are a lot of people with the same name and a different story. See what happens.
  3. Visit Wikipedia and click the “Random Article” link on the left-hand side.  Get lost in the site for an hour, discovering worlds you never knew existed.  If the article talks about a place nearby, drive there.
  4. Decide to say “Yes!” to everything for a month, a week, or even just for a day.  See what doors open for you!
  5. Open an atlas, close your eyes, and randomly stab your finger anywhere on the page.  Decide to go there for your next vacation. Or at least spend a half hour learning all you can about that region of the world.
  6. Join an internet dating site, and remember what it feels like to flirt a little! If you are already happy in your relationship, do something spontaneous together and remember why you love each other.
  7. Lookup and hook up with old friends from school or somewhere in your past. That may spark some motivational thoughts that could reenergize your life and reality. Those who knew you in the past remind you of things you haven’t thought about in a long time, and some of these things will help you.
  8. Buy an item of food from the supermarket you would never usually purchase.  Indulge! Change! Be different, and that may start to get you out of your rut.

Some more Motivational thoughts for your day

  1.  Send a random “Hello!” text message to the person with the cell number one digit up and down from you.

  2.  Get to know our neighbors. We live in a society that is so afraid that they keep to themselves. Meet some of the great people right in your living space.

  3. Decide to “play” today.  Go to the seaside, enjoy a little bowling, play a board game with family, go outside, enjoy a walk, move!!

  4. Be mischievous.  Play a prank, and don’t worry about getting caught! There are many jokes that you can do tastefully and respectfully. Be sure that the person you are pranking or joking with is acceptable to that kind of interaction.

  5. Enjoy a leisurely meal with your loved ones…..share the preparation of the meal…..enjoy the time together. Celebrate your loved ones by creating a family journal of photos,

  6. Celebrate your loved ones by creating a family journal of photos, notes, and special memories.

  7. Spend time walking in an inspiring natural location with a friend you haven’t seen for a while.  Enjoy conversing with your friend – listen to their insights and share some of yours.

  8. Go for a 20-minute power walk to clear your mind, boost your circulation and improve your energy levels.

  9. Buy 12 life-enhancing books and read one a month.

  10. Try a completely new activity, something you haven’t done before, and enjoy the adventure of learning something new.

  11. Sit under a tree for an hour or three and do nothing.  Listen to the sound of nature’s voice.  Enjoy the stillness of being in the moment

  12. Do something nice for someone you don’t know and do it anonymously.  You feel good factor will soar as a result of our kindness.

  13. Join a dance class. Go wild, have fun and enjoy the freedom of moving to the music.  Try a local five rhythms class if you prefer spiritual over disco or salsa.

  14. Spend a night stargazing.  You cannot fail to be awe-inspired by the magical, vast universe that is out there.

  15. Rekindle old friendships…spend a day catching up and enjoying the company of old friends

  16. Go out to the nearest city to make one new friend.  Strike up random conversations, visit coffee shops and libraries, and see where the day takes you.

Bonus Motivational thoughts

  1. Be creative: take a pottery class: learn how to paint with oils: try basket weaving. Do something creative that allows you to connect with the natural power within us all.

  2. Do something spontaneous and for no reason at all, just for the sake of improving your motivational thoughts. There doesn’t have to be a reason behind everything you do.

  3. visit a nearby comedy club and enjoy some always enjoyable laughter.

  4. Anything else you can think of that will spice up your existence and allow you to stay out of a rut. Change is the key to motivational thoughts.

Take a moment and give these inspirational thoughts some consideration today. You don’t have to try them all, but doing just one will allow you to add some excitement back into your life.  Motivational thoughts will indeed lead to motivational actions.

21

Reading For Life

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Positive Thought Project

Read~  look at and comprehend the meaning of (written or printed matter) by mentally interpreting the characters or symbols it is composed.

readAll of us are given a mind, and it is up to us and the choices we make to expand the abilities of this tool, or we let it wilt away over time.  The ability to read is probably the most powerful skill a person can master. Not only does it improve your imagination and comprehension, but you also can learn anything at all a book can provide to you.  This relationship to information is far more personal than learning through listening or watching. Reading is an all-encompassing experience with the knowledge that you are dealing with.  To take advantage of this, all you have to do is make an effort to find sources with the information you are interested in and read it.  It all begins with a conscious awareness of making an effort to read each day. To read becomes a focus in your thoughts, words, and actions that will change your life for the better. (video)

Exercise for the Brain

Of all the skills I have amassed in life, I didn’t realize how lucky I was to be literate at some level since I was very young.  Books were a way to entertain and stir my imagination, but the real power of reading and books is that they allow your mind to become better, digest, and become one with the readinformation you read.  It is a close and personal relationship that you develop with books you read, and the thoughts they provoke become a part of you.  There is no more significant life changer that I have found.

Reading allows your mind to develop like a finely tuned athlete.  The more you work, the more it can digest and the better you retain information.  That is how it worked for me. So even if it is a brief period, spend some time every day reading.  It can be just for a couple of minutes, but do it and allow the reading process to work inside your mind. The person who will benefit is you and build your abilities to think and achieve in the world.

Expanded Minds Never Shrink

Once you choose to read and learn, there is no going back. Once a new idea is introduced, the mind expands. It weighs the merits, values, and read beliefs involved in the concept.  What can we take from this? Is this true? How does this jibe with previous experience?  What does this explain?  This process is always happening to the person who reads thought-provoking works.  Find books that make you think, read them and let the magic happen.  At first, it can be challenging to digest new information that changes your paradigms.  We are creatures of habit, and change can be difficult even for the most enlightened. But change defines life, and I choose life.

Once a mind starts to grow and honestly evaluate information, a person has the tools to do more, think more, and become more in life. Enjoying life is a process that comes with natural growth, and reading enhances that. The expanded mind is never going to shrink again. Once you have seen the light, you will not move back into the darkness.  Read today, read tomorrow and read every day.

Diet of Reading is Important

Different books are going to resonate with other people, just like people enjoy different types of music. But remember that the kind of books you read is going to affect the development of your brain.  If you eat nothing but readjunk food, you can live, but you won’t be as healthy as you could be. The same is true of books. Reading works of low thought and little value will help your imagination, but you can’t expect to develop to your best if you are not feeding your mind a well-balanced, healthy diet of words.

It starts with what you are interested in and what you want to accomplish. Whatever that is, there is a book with insight into how to complete a task, create a particular business, or improve skill; You can find it all in a book.  If you choose to spend your time reading cheap romance novels or negative stories fraught with violence, then this will impact your life that way.  The quality of the ingredients used will dictate the value of and the enjoyment of the meal.

So be conscious today and aware of making time to read and reading essential things which will expand your mind and increase your abilities. It is all out there for you to do. You just have to make an effort. It all starts with your thoughts, words, and actions today!!

“It is what you read when you don’t have to that determines what you will be when you can’t help it.” ― Oscar Wilde.

“Reading is an exercise in empathy; an exercise in walking in someone else’s shoes for a while.” —Malorie Blackman.

“Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body.” —Joseph Addison

“Reading—the best state yet to keep absolute loneliness at bay.” —William Styron

“A book is a dream you hold in your hands.” —Neil Gaiman

 

21

Believing it

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my mind works overtime, sometimes
my mind works overtime, sometimes

 

I developed a post about my core beliefs a few years ago. Since then, I have experienced a lot, but, remarkably, so much of what I believed has stood up to the test of time.

These personal beliefs are ever-evolving, but this is where they stand right now.

All People are Connected

Call it God, the Universe, or whatever your religion dictates, but to me, we are all connected through a divine order.  All people contain the same abilities for great love and an equal capacity for evil.   I believe that the perceived separateness of the world leads to many of the problems we face in religion, race, age, sexuality, or any other label we can apply to each other. Just as many drops fall together to make the ocean, we are all unique pieces of the whole. The more we recognize the same, the more understanding and kindness we can show each other, and the better the world will be.

Practice kindness with all people because you are a few circumstances away from being exactly in their shoes.

Your Actions Define Who YOU Are

Talk is cheap. What you do is the definition of your character.  I have heard the soft and sympathetic words that were worth absolutely nothing but have been blessed by the actions of many great people.  Saying you are something means nothing. Being that thing means everything.

Taking action is the catalyst to all achievements, great and small. Having the courage to go, stay, jump, start, stop, begin again, love, share, understand, give, etc. It is the beginning of anything and will lead you to understand who you are and find your place in the world.

Live in the Moment, and it is all you have

It seems like I have wasted a lot of time, feeling wrong about the past and the things I can never change or worrying about the future and the things that most likely will never come.  When I can live in the moment, I find peace, motivation, enjoyment, love, etc.

Being in the moment and being grateful for all that exists with you at that time is a great recipe for happiness. Plan the best you can through goal setting and dreams but understand that you can’t control everything, and sometimes the things that happen, which seem unwanted, provide unforeseen growth and understanding. They catapult us into places we wouldn’t have thought to go.

Thinking Positively Leads to a Happier Life

“Bad” stuff happens to everyone at some point in life. How you deal with it is essential.  Life is full of things that you define as good or bad. Describing them as positives allows you to enjoy life more, be healthier, and support those you love. At the same time, negative thinking is defeatist and will supply you with the exact opposite.

How you choose to perceive anything will determine the overall value it provides to your experience of life. All things have the potential to work for good. Your mental state will determine how much interest they provide your life if any.

Positive thinking does not ignore the negative, and it should put it into a perspective of positive, as best that you can. It also doesn’t mean that you accept the poor behavior of others. It means that you do not choose to let poor behavior negatively influence you. I can’t control the behavior and choices of others, only the choices that I make. That is it. I try to do better than I did yesterday. That is all I can do.

All People Have Value

Sometimes, this is difficult to remember when I am angry or hurt, but that doesn’t change my belief.  People live differently, make poor decisions, and look differently, but inside they are all valuable. Every person that you meet knows something that you don’t, and that is the thing that is one of the many values of meeting new people.

All that separates any of us from the circumstances of another is mere chance.  At our core, we are all beings of love. Keep this in mind and be patient with others. There are always thousands of unseen reasons that lead to behavior. Don’t be quick to judge a story by the one short chapter you see. Read the whole book so that you can understand things in context.

Dreaming is Vitally Important

Every person that has ever been born has had a dream of some kind. There are no exceptions.  Life has a way of making many of us forget these dreams as we are swept up in living from day to day and the years drift past us.

Dreams of being a musician, a painter, a doctor, an astronaut, a professional athlete, or any other dream you might have had are a good thing.  Dreams help us to set our intentions for our actions. It is never too late to pursue a dream, and whether the dream is completed or not, the journey will be the valuable part that makes you who you are.

When a person takes action, they can make their dream come true.  That action will lead to a result of success or failure. Failure is not an ending, and it is the roadmap to finding another way to find success. Action toward your dream is the only way that you will know what works.

Gratitude is the Right Attitude

Being grateful for what you have in life leads to appreciation. Rather than looking for something else you don’t have for comfort or happiness, look at what you do have and be grateful for it.

There are many benefits that gratitude will bring to life, but happiness and enjoyment are two of the best. Remember that those you love and who love you are the greatest gifts and should never be taken for granted, be grateful for them.

Forgiveness is Necessary to Move Forward

Who hasn’t been hurt? Let down? We all have issues with others, and we all have a choice, be angry or forgive them. Forgiveness is a tonic that will allow you to be free. It isn’t condoning or approving of the behavior of others, but it is an acceptance of what has happened and making a choice not to let the power of that event rule you.

To forgive someone for something they did that harmed you is very difficult. It can’t just be lip service of saying that they are ignored. It has to be inside your heart.  The only one who can give forgiveness is you, and the sooner you give it, the sooner you can move on.  Letting go of pain, sadness, anger, or any other negative emotion is key to enjoying life.

I read somewhere that you know that someone is forgiven when you think of them, and there is no subtle searing inside your heart.  It can take a conscious effort, but with forgiveness comes freedom and strength.

Embrace Love, Avoid Fear

All people carry this choice inside of them. The one you pay attention to will determine the experience of your life.  Focus on the love-based emotions of kindness, understanding, generosity, acceptance, patience, and love while avoiding the fear-based emotions and thoughts of anger, hate, separation, jealousy, stereotyping, and judgment. It can be harder to do than it sounds, but the effort is well worth it.  Our experience is primarily the result of this continual decision. Fear or love?

 

21

Your Path

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Finding your path is not always this easy.
Finding your path is not always this easy.

Life is a beautiful thing. It is destined to surprise you and lead you to places that you anticipated.  I believe much of the enjoyment of life comes directly from inside of you and how you perceive the people you meet and the experiences you have.

Sometimes early in the journey of life, you may find life a confusing jumble of mixed messages and emotions. Even the greatest adventurer or psychic would struggle to smooth out the details and work through the challenges faced.  Nobody ever said that life would be easy, but in the end, it has the potential to be the most rewarding journey imaginable.

Living in the Madness Without Going Mad

madnessOften the world seems like a crazy place.  There are bad things all around us that are mad. There is a crime, injustice, hunger, disease in the world that seems overwhelming to the humanity of anyone. Combine that with the everyday callousness of people, and it can be easy for those with a tender heart or spirit to feel discouraged and even crushed trying to figure out where they fit in. How can they make a difference?

With all types of people and personalities in this world, nobody should feel all alone. If you feel like you don’t fit in with the people you encounter, it is time to start meeting other people.  If you continually feel out of place with the ones you see, the problem may not be you. It may be them.

Life will steer you in the direction that you should be moving in. Sometimes you will resist because you think you know best, but life is always proper in the end.  Find your group where you do fit in. You may have to look a bit further away than the people you meet, but nobody is alone in the world. Some intellectuals are contemplating the very questions you are and merely need to be reached out to find the comfort you seek to be happy.

The Danger of Reaching Out

If you don't reach out, you will never know what is out there.
If you don’t reach out, you will never know what is out there.

It is scary to reach out, especially at first.  This is where you have to be brave and realize that only by reaching out can you connect with like-minded people like you. In today’s world, it has never been easier. There are all sorts of social networks available for all adventurers.  WordPress is best for writers and deep thinkers, I believe.  It is the most supportive and kind community I have ever encountered. There is Facebook, Instagram, and even Twitter communities to search for as well.

When I started to reach out to like-minded people, I was petrified that nobody would understand me. Some might not have, but most people got it.  Developing relationships is sharing ideas and thoughts about how this ride of life should work out.  One thing I know without a doubt, if you don’t reach out, you may never find those who are on a similar journey, and isolation is the result of that choice.

Embrace the Enigma of Yourself

enigmaWe all feel like we are a mystery to the world. If people could only see inside us, we would magically be embraced by the masses and be held up as an example of the caring, loving kindness we naturally are.  However, in most social situations, that’s not going to be the case.

Why should the world see into the inner workings of your mind? Why would you want them to? You would be setting yourself up for unneeded and unwarranted criticism of your ideas and what you stand for.  Embrace the enigma that you present to the world. Like a great book, life saves its most exciting and stomach whirling experiences for the later chapters.  They are fun to read because they keep you guessing, making you an exciting and unique individual.

Early in life, this can seem not very clear and make you question yourself.  You are immersed in the game of life, so it isn’t easy to see the moves coming five or ten or fifteen years down the road.  Perhaps it is not others that view you as an enigma; maybe it is you. Embrace your mystery, and there is no more exciting journey to go on than to find out who exactly you are.

You are not Invisible.

Everyone feels invisible sometimes.  Does the world ever see us? The real us?  I am not sure, but I know that often this feeling can be disturbing.  I have a mind with great thoughts. Why doesn’t anyone notice?  The answer is they do see.   How often do you notice the minds and opinions of others?

All relationships, from long-time friendships to people you meet each day, are two-way streets.  The give and a take make relationships work.   Some relationships last a lifetime, and some only for a season.  All come into your life for a reason, usually to teach you something. Be open to the lessons.

Isolation is not The End Game.

isolationWhen you have tried to connect and fit in, at some point, you might want to throw up your hands and give it all up, move to an island and live by yourself.  This is not a good option, not because you need the world (you do), but because the world needs you. There is no way that you can know or begin to understand the impact you will have in the future.

Living in isolation will feel safe, but the problem is that you have no others to help balance your thoughts.  You only see the world through your window and interpret it with your own bias and judgment.  Intellectually, creatively it isn’t easy to grow and move forward when you close yourself off from the world.

Find your Path

When you feel this way, like giving up on others, you are fighting against life. It is time to start moving with it.  This can seem impossible, but it isn’t. People do it every day. I have done it.  This is what has helped me.

  1. meditate. If you can learn to quiet the mind, you will find that the ego supplies you with all sorts of criticism you do not deserve. It is challenging to be positive if your ego is destroying your self-confidence daily.

  2. Be creative. Whatever you do, write, paint, draw, sing, play the xylophone, whatever you do, do it for a bit, and you often will find your answer.

  3. Read information about your problem. This may seem simplistic, but it works.  There is no problem of humanity that you are experiencing for the first time. Someone somewhere has experienced what you are and deal with it effectively.  Learn from the mistakes and triumphs of others.

  4. Be positive. There is no way to achieve or grow if you enter into a negative mind and stay there.  If you do that, the odds of finding a positive solution are impossible.  If you are positive then anything is possible. ANYTHING!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R74shUIiSIY&feature=youtu.be

 

21

Wishes

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What do you wish you spent more time doing Ten years ago?

Five years ago, life was very different.
Five years ago, life was very different.

Ten years bring many life changes. I have changed jobs a few times, moved to new locations, and changed my entire outlook on life.

Looking back,  it is kind of amazing that so many experiences came to me in the short period of a few years.

Now, like most people looking through the lens of experience, there are many things I wish that I had been doing earlier in my life. But all is a process, and you have to follow them step by step. What seems like wasted time is really time to learn.  A few of these lessons follow.

I Don’t Think I Thought Enough.

positive-thinkingOne of the things that I really wish I spent more time doing was thinking.  Not the egoic thoughts of judgment and criticism, I had plenty of those, but time spent contemplating the wonder of life and how to live it and be happy doing it.

I spent way too many years just assuming that I knew the answers when I really wasn’t even aware of the right questions.  It is an inevitable part of the aging process that when you reach the 40’s you start to reevaluate your thoughts, and you start to see through the cracks quite clearly because you are just not happy even though you did all that you were supposed to do.

However, I am also wise enough to know that I couldn’t have possibly spent more time thinking five years ago because I was not ready to absorb the lessons life had for me.  In time, I can only hope that I am a willing receiver and am moving my thoughts in the right direction—kindness, acceptance, and understanding.

Understanding  Friendship Better

pravs-j-hold-on-to-friendshipFriendship is a two-way street, and I was the kind of person five years ago who thought I had many friends.  I had a lot of acquaintances with whom I shared a job or an interest in golf but very few friends.  I wish that I had invested more time in developing those relationships on my part.

When hard times come, you find out who you can count on and whom you can’t.  I don’t blame anyone but myself for this realization.  I think I just expected friendships to continue without any real investment on my part.  Since all relationships are two-way streets, I have to conclude that the disappearance of so many in a time of crisis has to reflect my own contribution to those relationships.

I should have been investing more into those relationships a long time ago.  There are many people I miss. Those who I laughed with sharing a joke over lunch, or just in passing jest. The loss highlights my failure as a friend was a significant shortcoming.  I, of course, would never value friendship as much as I do today if I hadn’t had that experience.  The friends I make in life, and the world are all so very cherished by me. Any person who cares enough about me to invest interest and time is indescribably valued.   Sometimes it is lessons learned the hard way that lasts.

Not Doing It Alone

It is OK to accept a helping hand once in awhile and to give one as well.
It is OK to accept a helping hand once in a while and to give one as well.

There are some dark and difficult times in all lives, and mine was the darkest and most difficult seven years ago.  There is little value in getting into the details because they don’t matter much.  But I was in dire need of help then but did all that I could to avoid getting it.  I pushed away those who cared about me so that my depression and problems wouldn’t “bother” their lives.  I suffered in silence, and the keyword here is suffered.

Suffering is a part of life, but it can be made much less difficult if you don’t choose to suffer all alone.  There were plenty of people willing to help, but when you are in a hole, you don’t see the value.  At least not until long after the need for help is imminent.  I should have asked for help and allowed others to help me. I did not.

This was a valuable lesson for me though I think as I read things people post about struggles that they are having, I am glad to offer support and encouragement to them because they may, in fact, be in a hole of their own if they need help in how to get out. Hopefully, they know to ask.  I may not know the answer, but I will attempt to help.

Ten years have brought a lot of change. I had never written a significant word of any kind in my entire life, I had never heard of a blog, and I was shoulder deep in negative, self-defeating thoughts.  It has been an interesting time period. Any wish to do anything differently is really just a wasted thought because all experiences are a gift that provided the life lessons to become a better person, and for that, I am grateful.

 

21

Question Everything

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questioneverythingThe ability to question things is one of the greatest gifts that people are given.  It is not a skill that I developed until recently in life, but I think it should be one that our society encourages in all people, everywhere, all the time.

Why We Don’t Question Anything

For much of my life, I was conditioned to accept what authority symbols in my life told me.  Our parents started us off by giving us the rules of how we were supposed to behave. They passed the baton of behavioral instruction to teachers and religious Philo albertorganizations, who managed to move me toward a fear-based existence.   “Do what we say, or you are wrong.”  That was the mantra of society.   

You learned young that if you questioned something, you would pay the price of being evaluated poorly, a knock to self-esteem, and it was apparent conditioning, find the answers and speak the ideas you were told were right.

That would be followed by praise and reward.  This is easily transferable to the media and popular culture.  We don’t question easily because we were taught that the repercussions of asking questions were most likely going to be painful and harmful to a young mind.  So it is natural that we never question anything.

Main Stream Media Brainwash

We were taught through this process to believe what our authority sources tell us. As adults, we transfer that quite easily into listening to what the government tells us or, even worse, into what the media tells us to think about the government.

Our ability to reason and judge things based on their merit seems to be gone the way of the eight-track tape player.  I hope I am I_have_just_as_much_authority_as_the_pope._George_Carlinwrong, but there seems to be a strict and consistent idea of what questions it is OK to ask and which ones it is not.

We have been involved in a military conflict for a decade, yet nobody questions why?  If they do, they have to face questions about their judgment, patriotism, political leanings, and character flaws. It is our right as human beings living on the earth to question everything.

Why Questions are So Important

Without the ability to question things, it will be very slow in coming when change is needed.  The history of humanity is littered with examples of practices that society told people were good for them, that weren’t or were just plain wrong. These practices needed to be changed for the health of a person or a society. People believed that regular bathing was unhealthy, the world was flat, and the Earth was the center of the universe.  Not to mention the accepted racial attitudes plaguing society of just fifty to a hundred years ago.  Question everything that comes into your life because simply taking something perpetuates unfair and unjust practices.

I am grateful today that I live in a world where you can ask questions.  With each question asked, the world moves closer to finding an answer to solve its problems.  I hope that more and more people will take the time to listen mindfully and honestly look at their own beliefs.

21

Your Time

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If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?

accomplish motivations
You Can Do It Now!

There are two ways to go with this answer, and you can say: “If something hasn’t happened yet, then it is not ever going to happen.”  This will lead to losing the few strands of hope you have left for accomplishing the task you dream about.

Or the other answer can be: “The time must be ripe for whatever it is that you have brewing and dream of achieving, and the only thing you have to lose is more time passing before you achieve whatever it is you want to accomplish.”  Thus leading to the achievement of your dreams.  I don’t know about you but the second one sounds better to me.

THE TIME IS NOW!

I believe that there is no time right now to do whatever you have been thinking of achieving.  This doesn’t mean that you have to do it all today, but start moving in that direction, and you will be surprised where you may end up as you approach your goals.

There may be seemingly insurmountable obstacles in your path, but even the tallest mountain can only be crossed by taking initial steps. That is the way of the world, and if you long to achieve something, you can do it.

When you look at the part of the question yet, it would seem to indicate that you have

It won't work out
We all have that voice in our heads. Trust yourself.

been thinking of doing something for a long time, maybe it seems financially unrealistic, or seems to take away from your family time, or some other reason.

There will always be a reason if you want to avoid accomplishment. There are lots of people who have accomplished great things after a lot of struggle.

Historically speaking, you can find many who persevered and contributed much to the world at a much more significant age. Leanardo da Vinci was drawing significant sketches as he enjoyed his sixties, Michelangelo created sculptures of great talent in his eighties, Winston Churchill traveled the world and contributed to society right up until his death at the age of ninety. Leo Tolstoy wrote novels as his seventies rolled by.  So it has been proven that it is never too late to achieve anything.

Picture Your Success

success will come to you
Well, what would you do?

The most important factor to hold on to when you are seeking achievement is that you have a clear picture of what you want to accomplish, then the path will open up to you as you investigate how to make this thing happen.

Often it is not the destination but the journey that provides the most fertile ground for growth and contentment, and if you never get started, you will never experience any of it.

All it seems that you have to lose is the regret of never knowing if you could have achieved your goal or desire or not. How many people go to their graves with regrets about what they never tried? How many allowed a failure or twenty-nine failures or a hundred failures to stop them from learning and accomplishing what they might accomplish if they only tried just one more time.  I think that in the end, there is nothing to lose, except doubt and regret.

If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?

No Regrets!!!

 

21

Following Your Compass

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When you stop and look at where you are in your life and the people you are currently involved with, the biggest factor determining all of this is the values you follow and adhere to in your life. As the late great Zig Ziglar said;

“You are who you are and what you are because of what has gone into your mind. You can change who you are and what you are by changing what goes into your mind.”

Our own personal system of values determines the mode of input for all of us.  For every problem I have faced or challenges that arose, the success I have had with it has stemmed from the character I displayed through my values. There have been times in life where my value system was a little murky. That led to questionable behavior and less than ideal results.  That is the compass we all follow, which leads us to the destination in our lives. Where is your compass leading you? Where would you like it to take you?  Your values will reveal these answers. It is as simple as that.

Values

What are your values? A value is a person’s principles or standards of behavior; one’s judgment of what is important in life.  They can be positive or negative or anywhere along thatscontinuum. When I look at myself, Honesty, integrity, compassion, work ethic, independence, learning, kindness, and reliability are all positive values I apply to my behavior.  Since I have placed my focus on these things, life flows quite easily in that direction.

Your behavior is the true measure of your values. If you take what isn’t yours, you are not honest. If you bully someone else into making yourself feel better, then you are a bully. If you have no compassion for those in difficult situations, that tells everything about your life. Values will color all of your experiences with the brush of those questionable values. And when you are sitting there in anger and frustration because things are not working out for you, you have no one to blame but yourself and the negative values you have adopted.

If you don’t like your life, start by changing the values you focus on and practice.

Where Values Come From 

As little humans, we are each trying to figure out what this world is all about from the moment we are born. We are continually taking in information based on the behaviors and reactions of all the people we contact.  This stage lasts the first seven years of life, and during that time, our moral compass is passed on to us by the observed behavior and direct experience with others. Parental figures are the biggest influence, but so is everyone else you come in contact with.

We do not realize it at first, and some never realize it, but we are all responsible for our choices in life and the values we practice in all situations.  Just because we were born into a situation where poor values were practiced is not an excuse. You decide for yourself where your ethics and morality lie. If you choose to be unethical, you are responsible for that and the things which result from that effort.

Your Compass Bearings

When we look at the trajectory of our lives, it is easy to blame others, bad luck, the government, nature, or any factor that exists. Many of the things outside us we have no control over.  We can control the decisions we make around the values and morals we prioritize in our lives.  Our compass bearings are created from this.  There is no more accurate predictor of where that compass is going to take someone than personal values.

We are wholly responsible for the outcomes of our lives, and the more we take that, the better your life experience will seem. Life seems to bring us to the places we show appreciation for, and we show this appreciation through our values and the importance we place on them.

Today is a great time to reflect on your personal system of values and seek places you would like to tweak them in a direction in line with your ideal self. You will define this one way or another.  Please pay attention to the bearings of your compass of values and what they are telling you about life.

Some quotes on Values:

“When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier.” Roy E. Disney

 “Our value is the sum of our values.” Joe Batten

 “If you don’t stick to your values when they are being tested, they’re not values, they’re hobbies.” Job Stewart

“Good moral values are mostly molded from a place where love, faith, and hope exist.” Arsenio V. Manalo Jr