Monthly Archives: March 2022

22

Standard Bearer

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Standards- a level of quality or attainment.

There is a level of behavior we will accept in any situation. These are our standards. Our standards exist in our relationships, our careers, and ourselves, and the level of quality we agree is the level of quality we will be defined by in life. Today the challenge is to look at the standards you accept in all phases of your life. Is it time to raise the standards of what you expect? This fact can only be discovered if you are more conscious of exactly what your standards of behavior are. It begins by looking at your thoughts, the resulting emotions, the words you use, and the actions you consciously take every day. What are your standards? Are there things you can no longer accept? Change is an inevitable part of life; if you are not happy with the way things are going, it is time to change.

Professional Standards

No matter what you do to earn a living, you have standards of the behavior you expect from those around you. Your self-esteem and value will determine the level of those standards in life. If you believe you are valuable, you will demand to be treated with respect in all interactions. The great thing is, that is most often how people will treat you.   It is not wrong or awkward to hold people to a standardsstandard of behavior, and it is the level at which you perceive your value and stick to it.

Your self-worth has been developed since you were very young. The messages you were sent as a child the way your parents, teachers, and peers treated you created your standards. It doesn’t matter what career you are in, and people will treat you accurately the way you allow them to, which comes from your criteria. Look at what you accept, then think about how you would like to be different and take nothing less than that behavior. It is not bitchy, difficult, or wrong to feel self-value and expect to be treated positively. It would help if you demanded it in the workplace.

Relationship Standards

When it comes to relationships of all kinds, standards are vital to the type of treatment you will accept and receive. Relationships are a difficult thing to learn how to manage. There is no class in school to help you manage all of the emotions, thoughts, and behaviors that come from being in a relationship with someone, and you have to figure it all out on your own. Since most of us are in our teens when we standardsare forming these standards, they can be very inconsistent, varied, and all over. Our earliest experiences with love will build the base for all relationships that follow. If you accept bad behavior or lack self-esteem, you may think this is the type of relationship you deserve and the one you will get until you change your standards.

Look at your relationships today and see where your standards lie. Honestly, know where you are on your partner’s priority list and see if that is where you want to be. Is your standard too low, too high, or just right? This inquiry is the type of conscious thought that can improve your life. Love is difficult to manage because it comes with an equal slice of fear. Fear of being alone, being judged by others, failing, not being reasonable, or not being successful can always haunt you. All of these are rolled into relationships, and they help set the standards of what type of treatment you accept. Are you living out of love or fear? Set your criteria to love, acceptance, understanding, kindness, and support for your partner. Accept nothing less than that in return, or you will be living an unhappy life.

Your Standards

Then there are the standards you set for yourself. The behavior you accept from yourself will affect your life and the success you experience more than anything else. If you look in the mirror and you don’t like your fitness level, it is time to make a change. Start by looking at your standards for what type of food you eat standardsand how much exercise you are getting. Those standards need to change before you can. The same is true in finances or the quality of your relationships. What you accept from other people is going to be what you get.

The good news is that all of this can change and change quickly. We can change standards, and behaviors and experiences will change with them. You won’t lose 40 lbs in a day, but you can start your path to losing 40 pounds by setting higher standards for yourself and then being dedicated to living up to0 them. If you accept nothing less than your criteria, you have no choice but to improve in whichever areas you have chosen to focus on in your life. Where focus goes, energy flows.

First Thing to Do

The first thing to do is to identify what your standards are. Rest assured, you are achieving the standard you set for yourself. Set them higher if you want to experience improvement. It all starts with a conscious awareness of all of your thoughts on what you accept, how you deal with the resulting feelings, the words you speak to express them, and your actions. Nothing happens without your direct and consistent action.

“If you want to change your life, you have to raise your standards.” -Tony Robbins

“Key to success? Change the status quo. Raise your standards.” -Anonymous

“Never lower your standards to fit in with other people.” -Anonymous

 

22

Finding Refuge

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Refuge-a condition of being safe or sheltered from pursuit, danger, or trouble.

One of the advantages of growing up and living in a place like Maine is the connection you develop to the locations you come in contact with, which provide you with a relationship to nature and a link to who you are and what your life stands for. There are many unique places I have connected with over the years, and to go there, spend time, and think that brings back my history and the events of my life. These places provide me with a refuge. safe to develop who I am and help me piece together how I fit into this world. All thinking, people have places they go to strip away the junk the world heaps on a person as life rolls on and sometimes over us. Being able to think and put things into the proper perspective for ourselves is the purpose of developing a place that provides you with refuge and, hopefully, peace.

A Connection to Nature

Some of the best places for refuge I have found have been in spots where there is a natural connection. I again am fortunate to live in an area with many opportunities like this to take advantage of. There are lakes, rivers, and the ocean readily available and waiting for you to reflect on them. There is a powerful feeling of awe when you can sit and look into something that has been there for thousands of years, and you know you are just one of a million passing visitors. The problems we are facing today always seem a bit smaller when we visit something that existed long before we were born and will be there long after we have left this life. It provides a perspective that generates gratitude. A shadow of my thoughts and feelings will be left there to touch some other visitor at another time. I often feel if I close my eyes and listen hard, I can hear the thoughts of those that have come before me. All have a burden, hope, and dreams to share, even if nature is the only one who hears.

I know I often get weighed down by the events I experience daily and need to let them go, and a bit of time in one of these places of refuge allows me to focus, relax, and reaffirm my priorities about what is truly important to me. We all have down moments in life where our negative emotions get us, and usually when we get our priorities mixed up, putting ourselves at the center of our focus. Visits to nature give me the chance to put the focus where it should be, outside of myself. Remember that the things we are leaving behind are small in the end, and it is the kindness we show to others and the love we give to them that will matter. I learned this lesson in places of natural refuge.

Refuge of Creativity

Rather than a physical place, one of the best places I have found peace and recovery is through the power of creativity. For me, it is in writing. There is a connection between my heart and mind that can come out in the process of writing, and I could not be very balanced without it. Often I write about the things I am working on to clarify it to myself, and sometimes it is to say to the world, “This is what I am feeling, how about you?”  No matter the purpose, creativity allows me to take a negative mood and turn it into more positive energy.

I have written all sorts of things and have gotten into writing something on most days. A refuge that sometimes I take for granted. Then I remember what it was like before I had this outlet, and I feel both grateful for my expressions and hopeful that other people will find their place of creative expression. Even if your feelings are just for yourself, let them happen because they are a part of you. Your emotions come out in artistic creation, and you feel better about everything. Create and find the refuge your mind crafts for you. Bringing something into existence from the recesses of your thought is a powerful and beautiful gift, and it makes all of the world a better place.

Everyday Refuge

Each day we find the places and activities which allow us to be our best selves. For me, I find refuge in the gym and working out. It keeps me centered emotionally and will enable me to keep myself feeling good physically. I also have a refuge at Panera Bread, where I have been coming to write for years. It has people, if you want that, food, but most of all, it has an energy that is welcoming and gives you a great place to think unencumbered. These two things do it for me, but I am sure that if you look at your life, there are everyday places and activities you participate in that allow you to be the best you can be.

I often wonder what great places I will discover in the future to think great thoughts or learn about life. Each moment is an opportunity to figure it all out and move forward in your existence with a plan that will bring you all the money, fame, and success you dream of. That is why we imagine. Places of refuge allow us the chance to build the momentum of thought and action to bring it all into reality.

Our Dreams

To dream about the things you want to create and experience is the essence of life. What has ever been made of value that was first not just a dream in someone’s head? All things ever were built this way. A person is in a situation where something is lacking, and they create a thought to make it better. It could be a drawing, a business idea, a new invention, a plan to build the world’s most giant ball of twine. Whatever the dream, it provides us with a secure refuge from the world’s terrors.

Those people who never dream or, worse yet, discourage all others from giving up their dreams are the worst kind of reality. Society will tell you to give up, put your feet firmly on the ground and forget about those dreams. They are all a lot of hot air about nothing. But in reality, they are the springboard to your greatness—the elevator to the top of your desires. I hope you are the best tomorrow. Anyone who would discourage this or try to destroy it needs to be avoided. Surround yourself with people who believe in you and encourage you to dream. All of your dreams may not work out in the way you plan, but your life will be better for taking refuge in them, if only for a moment. Dream about it and take action to make it all happen in reality. You never know what magic you can accomplish by taking your refuge snugly and entirely inside your dreams.

So take a moment today and look at the places and things that provide you the condition of being safe or sheltered from the world’s dangers. Please take a moment and be grateful for these beautiful places and things because they allow you to be the best. If you choose to move to a different location, and all of your current safe places are taken away, one of the first things you should do is find new ones. I think for all of us to be our best person. We need to have our places and things that allow us to express ourselves. What provides you with a refuge? Do you appreciate it? It all starts with the thoughts you are safe to think because of your sanctuary. The words you consciously choose will explain your place, and the actions taken will be the truth of the situation. Be safe and find your refuge today.

“The game of basketball has been everything to me. My place of refuge, a place I’ve always gone where I needed comfort and peace. It’s been the site of intense pain and the most intense feelings of joy and satisfaction. It’s a relationship that has evolved over time, given me the greatest respect and love for the game.”-Michael Jordan 

“A true friend encourages us, comforts us, supports us like a big easy chair, offering us a safe refuge from the world.”- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

“My dreams were all my own; I accounted for them to nobody; they were my refuge when annoyed – my dearest pleasure when free.”- Mary Shelley

 

22

I Chose It

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What if you approach everything coming into your life, “good” or “bad,” as if you chose it?

Challenges appear for everyone in life. We live, have experienced, and create ideas of a life without problems, in which we sail along on calm and friendly waters, but life often has other plans. Before you know it, there are scenarios you have never dreamed of touching your life and knocking you around.

Suppose there is something great inside you to develop your unique greatness. In that case, it takes a challenge or two, So even though life would be more comfortable if we were allowed to relax, put our feet up and enjoy the view, this is not the most beneficial thing for personal growth. We have a conscious choice to make when these challenges of life come. We can feel sorry for ourselves because something is happening that will take our best to overcome, Or we can be grateful for the opportunity to grow.

It is easy to say you will choose to be grateful, but when the hard times come of heartbreak, regret, and grief, it is all too easy to give up or retreat to self-pity for what you are currently going through. It takes all you sometimes have to regroup and overcome a challenge, but that is what life is all about.

The Way You Look At It

The difference between the two mindsets is based on how you look at things. Looking at life from a mindset of fear, every challenge seems overwhelming. Our focus is on a fear of loss, fear of what others think, fear of losing your identity, or just plain old fear of change. All of these are constant companions in life because of our experiences of pain in our past, working as continuous reminders. They usually bring the other time-waster, worry along with it. The choice to suffer is based on fear but worse because it involves using your imagination to construct horrible things in the future. It is paying now for problems in the future that will probably never happen, But there is a false belief in all of us that if we look for all the bad that might occur, we will never be negatively surprised. This theory is the real fantasy.

Problems will come unlooked for or not, no matter how diligently you seek them. Most often, we don’t choose them, and they are unavoidable. Nobody would accept them in their lives. That is not where the choice lies, and it lies in the reaction to the challenge. There are a million stories about people overcoming all types of adversity because a person chose a positive mental outlook. We all can choose to see the positive value in all situations we face.

Faith

Sometimes it may be difficult to see the good in a situation, But it always exists somewhere, just as there is a negative attached to every positive. You may get a new job, but you have to leave the old one behind. You may become famous, but that limits some of your freedom. Becoming wealthy can change your outlook on life, and those you know may not treat you the same.

Conversely, you may lose everything only to find the secret to success; you have been looking for real insights into who you are, and how you look at life will come after you have been hurt or disappointed in life. Rising to success is good, but growing to progress after being knocked to your knees defines greatness in life’s experience.

Seeing the positive potential of all things is an active and powerful example of faith in action  Nobody looks for difficulties  All we can do is make choices we feel are in our best interests. For a better life experience  For us and those we love  Each moment, we are faced with this choice to see things as an obstacle to allow you to grow or a barrier to keep you from becoming  That is a choice, that is your choice  Faith in the positive aspects of nature. The world allows you to see the opportunities for growth sitting right at your fingertips every day.

Take a Moment

Take a moment in a situation to think before you react emotionally. Anger is often the face of fear and a first thoughtless reaction to an attempt to assert your power over something. To find happiness, we have to go beyond the initial, knee-jerk reaction and let go of the need to control everything  Because we can’t. Your ego has been conditioned to think this way, and our egos are problem starters, not problem solvers  The need for control, the need for approval from others, and the need to judge others are all negative messages of the ego  When they can be avoided, life is a much gentler and happier ride.

So instead of falling into the trap of small ego thought, take a moment and allow a broader scope of perspective to develop. All of us are capable of seeing more of the field of possibility and creating a better result for ourselves from the challenges we face. When you can accept yourself exactly as you are and accept others exactly as they are, you will finally experience peace  Life is full of decisions, and you have the gift of choice in every moment of every day. Nobody else to blame for your unhappiness than yourself, So be grateful for the challenging days, just like you are for the good days, and see how your life changes.

“The most difficult thing is the decision to act. The rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its reward.” – Amelia Earhart

“When bad things happen to you, focus on what you can learn from it. If you focus on the bad, you’re doomed to repeat it.” – Mel Robbins

“And we have complete control over our own attitude  We are the ones we decide how we feel, how we look at things, how we react.” – Catherine Pulsifer

 

22

Smiling is My Favorite

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Smile- form one’s features into a pleased, kind, or amused expression, typically with the corners of the mouth turned up and the front teeth exposed.

When you look at life today, there is a choice. You can think of the difficult things or focus on the things that make you smile. A physical reaction takes place when you smile, endorphins are released into your brain, and you feel better. Even if you don’t have anything to smile about, smiling by itself improves your mood. Now imagine all of the things you do have to smile about, and that mood of yours will become downright positive. It begins with a focus on your smile and the thoughts, feelings, words, and actions that result from it. Let’s find your reasons to smile today. Sometimes it just takes a smile to change the world.

You are Amazing

Let’s start with the fact that you are amazing. That should put a smile on your face! Think of the things which make you uniquely you. The way you encourage others as nobody else can. The way you speak, sing, dance, run, think, feel, read, find, or any other thing you do uniquely, like no other person in the world. You bring a unique and dynamic presence to life, and life is a better experience because you are a part of it.

Think of the many times that your smile has made someone else smile in response. This reaction is because you are simply amazing, and your outward appearance of a kind and amused expression is enough to make other people feel good inside. So remember all of the fantastic things about yourself and make the world smile today! (And smile on the inside yourself)

Your Passion Makes You Smile

Follow your passion today, and let the emotions that result create your smile. You have talents that exist only in you, and when you explore them and share them with others, you can’t help but smile. Never worry about what others think of your passion and the activities that follow it. Expressing yourself, your thoughts, and your ideas in your unique way is part of being a great human soul. You are a world changer!

It is not for others to understand. Those who care about you will support and revel in your creations—those who don’t have their issues. Be patient with others and kind to them because their journey must be tricky for them. Smile because you can express yourself uniquely and thoughtfully. Your passions will allow you to enjoy the world a little more. Colors will be a little brighter, food tastes a little more productive, and life will be a better experience. Smile because of all this you bring to the world.

Smile Its All Around You

Love is the thing inside of you that will always make you smile. Think of the people that love you and care about your happiness or ever have. That should be enough to make you break out into the biggest smile. To gain that smilelove from anyone is a great thing. You are loveable, and when you smile, the whole world will stop and stare for a moment. You raise them with your love.

All thoughts are a choice between love and fear. To be kind, considerate, understanding, accepting, and just plain lovely, you are choosing feelings of love, and those thoughts will expand in a world where there are plenty of people wanting thoughts of fear, smile because you are one of the few that is ignoring that noise. Smile because you are a light in the world. That light is all around you. It makes me smile to think of.

Be Conscious of the Power of Your Smile

Spend some time today being conscious of all the reasons you have to smile today and the effect your smile will have on others. Look at your thoughts, the feelings they bring to the surface, the words and actions that result. This result is your gift to the world today.

Think of the sunny days of your pleasant past and those still to come. A smile will come to your face, and that smile reveals all of your goodness and strength. It is contagious, and one smile can spread from one look to another, and soon the whole world is a happier place.

“The real man smiles in trouble, gathers strength from distress, and grows brave by reflection.”- Thomas Paine 

“Smile, it is the key that fits the lock of everybody’s heart.”- Anthony J. D’Angelo

“Share your smile with the world. It’s a symbol of friendship and peace.”- Christie Brinkley

 

 

 

 

22

Being Generous

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Generous-showing a readiness to give more of something than is strictly necessary or expected.

GenerousSome people are bright lights to all those they encounter because of their generous nature—giving more of themselves to the lives of others simply because it is the right thing to do, and it might make someone else’s experience just a little brighter. Today look at your life and see ways to be generous with your time, thoughts,  actions, and personal gifts. These things can make a lifelong impression on others and teach them the value of being more generous. It will all begin by being more conscious of your generosity in thoughts, words, and actions.  

Characteristics of A Generous Person

I have received more from the generous nature of others than I deserve. There have been people who have bestowed kindness on me throughout my life, and I hope that I have been able to regift that kindness to others. I know Generoushow fortunate I have been to have my life touched by great, kind, and generous people. It is more than the things I received. It was the feeling of worth that someone else’s generous nature toward you brings. Another human being values your happiness and well-being enough to do something special for you. The gift of generosity contributes positivity to life.

Many of the people who have shown kindness to me over the years have since passed on. Those kind souls are certainly missed for the bright lights in the world. THEY ARE NOT SO FAR GONE when I think of them and the kindness they showed me and countless others. A cycle of good stems from every affirmative, generous act ever committed. Be conscious of the way your generosity could shine through today.

 Generous Means

If a person has never received excellent treatment from others, this suggestion might be in order. Giving more than is expected can come in monetary ways, but most of the charitable things I received were not money. Your time is the most valuable commodity, and how to invest that comes from noticing your interactions with others. If someone needs encouragement, you should take the time to encourage them. If someone needs a laugh, provide it. If you see someone needs to vent, let them vent.

Look at all of the situations that you are in and ask yourself the question, “Is there any more I can do here?” Most often, the answer will come to you. Treat all people with respect and kindness, and they will well accept your generosity. When your intuition says, “do this or that.” because it will make another person’s experience in life a little brighter, follow it. Do something that you don’t have to do for someone because you want to, and you can. Generosity will always make someone’s day a little better because it shows a level of caring that touches the soul.

Examples of Generosity in Everyday Life

It is everywhere. Be aware of the needs of others, and look to give a little bit more of yourself than is expected. Be extra conscious in your thoughts, words, and actions each day when being generous. Make someone else’s life a little better and the world a little bit better place.

 

Being Generous Quotes

“Be happy with what you have and are, be generous with both, and you won’t have to hunt for happiness.” ~ William E. Gladstone

“There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.” John Holmes

 “That’s what I consider true generosity: You give your all, and yet you always feel as if it costs you nothing.” Simone de Beauvoir

 “Give what you have. To someone, it may be better than you dare to think.” Henry Wadsworth Longfellow 

 

22

Inner Security

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One might look for a mighty castle to provide safety.

Life seems to be a maze of things we develop fear about experiencing. We are continuously looking for security in our day-to-day experience. Sometimes we look for relationships to provide a safe place to be ourselves. In other moments we see money as a security blanket against the world’s troubles. We create a constant state of stress and worry about what might happen and never know the joy and power of the moments we are in right now. To live in this way will push people to block good things from entering life and keep you on the treadmill of unhappiness. To stop the cycle, a person needs to start to look inside for items that are always there, always accessible, and always positive. These things are inside each of us, and turning your focus to them will provide as much security as you can expect in this life.

No matter what we do or how well we plan, the truth is. We have very little control over our external security, and we have total control over our inner security. To lack the ability to find safety inside is the definition of insecurity. No matter what happens outside, be secure about your reactions and feelings. Here are some areas your awareness can go to find security daily.

Find The Moment

Too often, too many people choose to live their conscious moments worrying about the future or regretting the past. Ignoring the most precious moment they have, the present moment. Being mindful of where you are right now and becoming aware of the situations, people, and things in your current reality are the only thing you have. The past is recollected the way we think of it, and the future is nothing but a fantasy. It hasn’t happened yet and may never occur the way you think.

Getting into the moment is as simple as being aware of what you are doing and living from that perspective. Sometimes we are so routine-oriented we make the majority of our choices through subconscious programming. Making conscious choices and noticing the moment is a power we have at our fingertips in each moment. There is significant security in this because the moment will always be the only thing there is, so making the most of it and finding joy in it makes a lot of sense. This appreciation comes from the inside, and you have it available to you all the time. It can be hard to see if your focus is “out there.”

Be Open

Another way to be secure is to be open-hearted toward the world. Too often choose to separate ourselves from others because they are different from us. But we all are the same, and by practicing an open heart, we can foster security of connection with all people because we are all connected. We all have the same blood in our veins and breath the same air. We have thoughts, take actions, and love one another. So many see fear when they look at individuals who are different from themselves, and it causes people to withdraw.

When you open your heart to others and life, you realize you are all in the same production, doing your best to play the role you have been assigned. Don’t waste time judging someone else; invest your time getting to know someone from a different station in life. Send love to everyone, especially those who are negative. They need it the most. Open your heart, and security will be yours.

Accept Yourself

Most people see the flaws in themselves quite easily. We compare ourselves to the images we see in the mainstream media or even on social media and pick out the ways we don’t quite measure up. Rather than seeing our uniqueness as a strength or an unusual defining characteristic, we dislike ourselves and hate that part of us. We have to accept what we are. It doesn’t mean we can’t improve and change. If you don’t get yourself now, you won’t receive yourself in a month or a year or five years when you have made all these changes.

Bring your awareness to the things about you, which are lovely and unique and make you a one-of-a-kind experience for the world because each of us has the luxury of being this. There has never been another person who looks like you, talks like you, or has your skillset throughout time. It has never happened before, and it will never happen again. Too often, people fight against who they are and what they look like because nobody is perfect. It is in our imperfections that many of our strengths lie. There is absolute security in the person you are. Embrace that person and accept them, strengths, flaws, and all.

Awareness and Appreciation

You are an infinite, creative, unique, and inventive living on this planet. Start to use your awareness to see all of the things already in your life, which are lovely, and then take a short moment to appreciate them for just being themselves in the scope of the world. Your awareness is the connection to your attention and focuses on what you are experiencing. Knowledge stops you from taking things for granted and allows opportunities for growth from passing by you.

Appreciation is a door you can open, which will bring more into your life. Are you a person who always sees the bad? Or can you find the good in any situation? All people have a choice about where they fall on this continuum. The majority of the thoughts you entertain and believe to be true will dominate your energy and the life you experience. Focusing on more positive things will allow more of those things to enter your life—a choice.

Unconditional Love

This emotion is the rarest of things because society has conditioned us to expect something in return for what we create or give to others. Putting your focus on the love you have for others is a great place to seek security, but the best is how you choose to love yourself. Nobody is perfect, but all of us are entirely constructed to be exactly who we are. It is too easy to stop and put awareness of your flaws rather than your talent and greatness. It is not arrogance or avarice to be proud of what you do well or what you love about yourself. To want more of these  things is a natural progression,

To offer unconditional love to the world or someone else is tough to do. The ego always tells you to judge someone for their harmful actions and punish them by not loving them anymore. It happens every day worldwide; love is lost and replaced with vengeance, anger, and even hate. Letting these emotions and thoughts dominate your mind and reality will harm you, not the person you are angry at and hate at that moment. You can love someone and keep them at a safe distance. Choose to love, no matter what, and see how it changes your life and gives you power.

Learn to focus and awareness of these things and develop the inner security that comes with them. There is little we can do to avoid the pitfalls and challenges that come to us externally, but we can build a security net inside ourselves, which is totally in our control.

Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.– Buddha

 

22

I Dare You

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Dare– dare to do something. Defy or challenge (someone) to do something

One of the most challenging things to do in life is to dare do something you are not sure you can accomplish. You may think that you can do it. You may dream that you can do it. You will never know for sure until you take the initiative and dare to try. There are challenges you face in every area of your life. It takes extraordinary courage to meet them and see where you stand. How much greatness has been left unshared because someone was afraid to try? Afraid of failing? Fearful of what people will think? Today I urge you to be brave, take a chance, and dare try. Let the greatness in you have an outlet, and it starts with a consciousness of your thoughts, being aware of the words you speak to the world, and actions you take to interact with life.

Dare To Keep Going

Sometimes we try, and we fail. It is a part of life. You will not get everything right the first time. The Universe will help you develop if you can accept its guidance. When you experience failure, it is essential not to take it personally. Much easier to say than to do. But if you take a step back and evaluate what has happened and why you can see what might need to change when you try again to make it a success.

The fear of the pain that results from failure can be debilitating, and many people would rather quit than be at risk of feeling that disappointment again. Don’t be one of them. Your song is yours to sing, and it may take a bit of fine-tuning before the goal is realized completely. The lesson of daring to try again is one of the most pervasive and repetitive ones that life will bring to you. Dare to try again and express the greatness you have inside of you.

Dare to be Different

We live in a world determined to make you want to fit in. From the time we enter school until the day we die, we are bombarded with messages to “stand in line,” “sit in a row,” “follow the directions.” These messages might as well be “be a sheep.”  As you grow, the words come in the form of propaganda from the media, and marketers tell you what is acceptable to wear, activities you should participate in, and even the job you should desire. When you look at the things you think are important, how many of them come from inside you, and how many come from the outside world? Do you wear clothes you like, or do you wear socially acceptable? Do you think that buying things will make you complete? They won’t.

I know that breaking from the pack, even in a small way, can threaten people. They will immediately try to put you back in line, usually through ridicule. But then a funny thing will happen. Once you dare to be different, people want to be like you. I am not sure they know why, but I think we all have a single song we want to sing. It is repressed, and seeing someone break out of the shell of expectation, lets us all know it is possible. If you feel like doing something different, dare to do it. Don’t follow straight lines of expectation just because it is easy. When you are on your death bed years from now, it is the things you never dared to do that will haunt you. Dare to be yourself. Dare to be different. It will make you extraordinary tomorrow.

  Dare to Create

In creativity, there is an opportunity for true originality to rise to the surface. Creative people are the best at solving problems, finding new solutions to problems, and looking at life. Creativity is the language of the soul, and we are at our best when we are creative. There is not a moment in life when creativity and encouraging others to be creative do not positively affect the world. As you are creative, your creations will change the world. Maybe that change will be minimal, but keep creating anyway because it is suitable for your heart and allows your light to grow and shine a little bit brighter.

The only way you will find out what creative things you like taking part in is to give them a try. When you are immersed in creation and time seems to pass without notice because you are so involved in the process, you have found an outlet. It doesn’t matter how “good” you are at it because that is based on the opinion of others. Your heart determines what activities and creations have value. Dare to be creative and try new creative outlets. The reward is a more prosperous life and a joy that can only come inside you.

Dare Today

So the challenge is there for you today to look at your life and what you want to do.

Do you dare to be different?

Do you dare to keep trying?

Do you dare to be creative?

Can you dare to do them all at once? Remember that this is your life; nobody else owns the responsibility for it. What you dare to do and be will define it. Dare today in thoughts, words, and actions. 

“Failures are made only by those who fail to dare, not by those who dare to fail.” ~Lester B. Pearson

“Dare to be the best you can at all times, dare to be!”– Steve Maraboli

“If I had my time over, I would do the same again. So would any man who dares call himself a man.” Nelson Mandela 

“We become strong by embracing vulnerability, we dare more greatly when we acknowledge our fear.” Gretchen Rubin 

 

22

Lost

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find yourselfBeing lost can be a terrifying situation, and you have no idea where you are or where to go to find safety and security. Yet it is in these times when a person has to look inside themselves for characteristics that will guide them toward a haven. 

The qualities and talents we possess work to guide us in times of trouble. When the seas are calm and we know exactly where we are going, there is no need for these talents to rise to the surface.

They lie dormant, like an emergency plan you never need to use. When we are lost, the emergency has arrived, and our talents will rise to the surface if we don’t panic and allow them to do so. In these moments, we find out just who we are, what we can do, and what makes us excel. You will find yourself and be impressed with the person that you meet who has been inside of you all along.

Steps to Find Yourself

Getting lost is not as easy as it sounds. People continually build routine into their day, which provides a find yourselfsense of security and control over life and its adventures. Unfortunately, life doesn’t play out that way. There is always a death, the loss of a job, a family emergency coming our way to destroy the routine and cause us to grow.

We need to get away from the normal and get into a place where our wits are required for us to thrive. You never know what you can do until you have to. Being lost can be the first step. Being lost in your direction and not knowing what you need in your life is a common thing. There is a need to get away from the noise and clamor of life and get to a quiet and still place. Inside and outside.

Who am I?

finding-yourself1Each of the things that I want to have associated with me will be chosen in search of myself, and that search will begin when I don’t know where I am. A chance to be still and look at the thoughts I think and what is important to me. Do I want to be fearless? Honest? Kind? Thoughtful? Reliable? Open-minded? Or would I rather be their opposite?

All of these questions are answered by each of us with every choice we make every day. When you are lost, you have a chance to observe the thoughts you are entertaining in your head consistently. These thoughts are going to describe what you are as a person. Sometimes we head down a road we shouldn’t because of poor decisions brought on by weak moments. Perhaps greed, lust, or desire pulled us into a pattern that we don’t like.

The beginning of change will come when we have the time to notice precisely what we are doing. When you are alone, “lost,” there is nothing that will bring you home but yourself.

Don’t Fear The Search.

Being alone and lost can be scary, but don’t fear the search inside you. The change will have to come as it inevitably will throughout life. We will change, and most will rise and fall like the tide in the ocean. We are moving from the peak of our abilities nowhereto the depth of our weakness. Life is a journey, and we shouldn’t fear these shifts. We should embrace them.

These fluctuations have led me from times of certainty to times of question. When I was searching, dramatic growth occurred, or the most important ideas came to me and helped move me back toward a better version of myself.

I walked through life for many years, thinking I knew what life was all about, only to be taught that I knew nothing. This lesson came as I was lost, but the best part of that experience was that it was that period of being lost that led to a flood of knowledge and change that improved everything and made me reach new areas of thought and action, and I look for that process to continue.

It happens in the deepest woods, the darkest night, the most secluded spot, that you realize that you are lost and know that there is nothing to fear at that moment. All is as it should be, and you are just a few moments away from finding your way to your best self.

 

22

Skipping Stones

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Each rock makes a unique ripple in the water, as you do in the world.
Each rock makes a unique ripple in the water, as you do in the world.

Moving around through a day, most people never stop and consider their mere presence’s influence on the things and people around them. Your mood and the way interact with whom you encounter on your daily journey will affect all in your path, but more significantly, it will influence those you interact with even more. Each day our thoughts, words, and actions are like a stone thrown into a calm pond with ripples flowing out in all directions. Imagine the energy you are sending to the world out of yourself each day. Where your attention goes, your electricity will flow. Which way does your attitude turn the lives of others? 

Throwing Rocks

When I was young, I would often throw stones into the lake we lived on for no reason at all. My brother and I would see who could throw the farthest or make the biggest splash or the most skips. As you watched

The ripple formed tells the story of the rock, as your ripples tell the story of you.
The ripple formed tells the story of the rock, as your waves say to the level of you.

All of the rocks hit the surface of the water and disappear to their murky destination, each left behind an expanding ring of ripples that carried with them the details of the size of the rock, its impact on the world, and the force with which it was discharged. Its energetic pattern remained for a brief and fleeting moment.

When I watched the ripples intersect and merge, I noticed a lot of different patterns. Some would join together and branch out and start a whole new wave. Others would override smaller ripples and completely dominate those smaller waves around them. Some would simply shine in the dwindling.

When ripples meet they combine to make unique experiences.
When ripples meet, they combine to make unique experiences.

Twilight radiates a signal all their own until they gently and almost imperceptibly disappear completely, either outside of my sight or splashing softly on the rocks of the shore at our feet.

Choose Your Energy

Today I can see that people and their attitudes are precisely like those rocks from long ago. Only the waves of energy they create can’t be seen. You can only feel them. Notice the next time you meet anyone the feeling or vibe you feel from someone. This vibration is unique to each person, and just like the stones from long ago, exudes information about that person.

That vibrational ripple is determined by each person’s thoughts and beliefs to pay attention to each day. The choices are between love, kindness, understanding, acceptance, gratitude, fear, hate, being mean, judgemental, angry, and ungrateful. These ripples will affect everyone you meet and everything you are involved in. Just as the waves on the water interact and change each other.

The key is that each of us has the choice each day, not each moment, to remake these choices and change the vibration that our energetic ripples exude. The challenge is to look at your thoughts and beliefs and decide how you want your energy to be perceived by others, and it is a simple matter of choice and noticing.

“The energy of the mind is the essence of life.” Aristotle

“It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan.” Eleanor Roosevelt

“Be a positive energy trampoline – absorb what you need and rebound more back. ” Dave Carolan

“Life gets easier if you choose only to think, act, and speak positive energy. Choose to be the light in somebody else’s darkness.” 

“I believe that positive energy and optimism help us to take up any challenge in life and to succeed in even the most difficult tasks. I also believe that positive energy is contagious: we can transmit it to others.”- Mohammed bin Rashid Al Maktoum

 

22

Finding the Flow

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Find Your Flow and Follow

Life is full of little words like flow. It is something that when you have it, life goes along smoothly, and when you lack it, everything feels like a struggle. It is a factor that most people don’t spend time consciously thinking about. But shouldn’t we? It makes sense we should focus our attention on a force making our lives a better experience. Our energy is totally up to us.

The great thing is that whether we are in the flow is all a matter of choice in what we decide to focus our energy on. Getting into the flow is as simple as paying attention to the moment at hand and experiencing that part of life, singularly by itself—conscious awareness of what is happening for you today.

In the Flow

One of the greatest gifts of playing sports is that you can experience what flow feels like and what it’s like when you lose it. In each athletic Flowcontest I have ever played in or coached, there is a flow to it. Not every game is the same, and what worked yesterday and provided success may not work today and might lead to disaster. I remember being in the flow a few times; they were few and far between because I didn’t know what was happening. I remember knowing what to do before it happened, a calmness of movement, confidence of action, that led to a connection with my team, the opposing team, and the game itself. My focus was solely on what I had to do at that moment. Not on winning or losing, but on doing what I needed to do. It is referred to as momentum in a game, and it changes teams as the focus and confidence change sides.

Life is full of chances to do the same thing. Be in the moment and react to what you need to do right now. Please don’t spend time worrying about the result that will take care of itself. Focus on the tasks you are doing and how you can perform them. A joy rises from within when you operate from flow, which is unavailable without a conscious focus.

Getting into the Flow

I think that our conscious focus on life is the doorway to getting into the energy flow. The first thing you need to do is thoroughly learn to be in the moment. You have to make decisions in each moment, which move naturally into the next. There is nothing terrible about the flow, and it feels good and allows you to be the best version of yourself, even if only for a moment. Once you change your focus and start worrying about the score, it will leave you.

The score in life is when you entertain thoughts about what others think about doing. Other people’s Thoughts are irrelevant to flow and don’t matter anyway. What you think about what you are doing is what counts. Another flow killer is to compare what you are doing to the performance. Your game is your game. Their game is their game. Focus on your tasks and movements that you can control, let the criticisms of others and their accomplishments stay in their game. Life is going to ebb and flow. It would help if you were willing to move with that same energy.

Accept and Embrace The flow.

Finally, to remain in the flow as long as possible, it is vital to understand the constant and inevitable influence change will have on you. Everything will change eventually. It may be small and almost invisible, or it may be significant and unmistakable. But it will change. Know that like a river, the flow of life will change course, but you can follow it with attention.

Some stretches of the river will be delightful, you move at your leisure, and everything passes quickly. Then there will be rapids, full of potential for growth and excitement. Looking back at the comfortable stretch will not allow you to master the rapids any better. Focus on the task at hand. That is where your life is. It is the choice of every person to fight against the current and try to return to calmer times. Or to go with the flow and ride it out, learning what you can about river navigation and preparing you for what is around the next bend in the river.

Today in all that you do, be conscious of and look for the flow that exists in life right now. Where is the river taking you? Focus on your thoughts, words, and actions to determine if they are going with the flow of your life or against it. Getting into the flow will allow you to be the best version of yourself that you can be today. What more could you want?

Life will move with the ease your focus dictates.

“Let reality be a reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. ” ~ Lao Tzu