There is the gratitude I feel for the downtimes, the darkness, and the sorrows of life. A thank you. That needs to be said and felt.
Why am I grateful for these things? Well, there is no other choice because these things will exist whether I am thankful for them or not. But when you think about it, difficulties and hardships are a vital part of the journey. They reveal much about ourselves, what we are made of, and force us to grow.
Darkness Shows Light
I heard it explained that without the night, the light of a candle would lose the value and unique power that its light provides. When I look back on less enjoyable times to experience, I can see the opportunity to shine within them. As a human being, the challenges life throws at you are tests that allow you to rise higher than you could without the problem or, unfortunately, a chance to be crushed by the difficulties you face.
The most significant people in history resulted from difficult historical times, and the same can be said about your life. The hard times or darkness allow you the forum to shine and succeed.
Make You More Grateful for Good Things
When you have things in life that are not pleasant, it makes you appreciate it when things are going pleasantly. If you have had a time of loneliness, companionship feels all that much better. If you have had tough economic times, the gratitude for bountiful times is all the more significant.
These sensations will not exist in their intensity without the contrast of darkness or hardship and downtimes.
Do Not Fear Difficult Things
One of the most challenging things to deal with is a fear of difficulties that may come in life. When you look at your life and think that everything is going well, it used to be a time when I would worry a lot. There was nowhere to go but down. Yet, worry didn’t stop problems, hardship, or poor decisions; it only made my enjoyment of the great things in my life more appreciated.
Do not be afraid that hard times may come your way. You always have the strength to pull them through if you can persevere. Keep moving forward with gratitude, and inevitable change will carry you to a better time.
So today, I am grateful for the hard times and the darkness of life because it allows people to rise and shine their light and become great. My wish for you is happy days and sunny skies and the courage to handle anything that comes your way.
“All things are as they should be, relax and enjoy them.”
Each day you wake up and have a simple choice as to what type of day you will experience. Is it a great day? A good day? A boring day? A bad day? A disappointing day? The decision that you make will determine how your day goes. Our attitude is the most significant factor in how much we experience life, and life is what you choose to make it.
One of the most critical factors that determine our attitude is how we look at our lives and the world. How do you spend your time? Do you look for ways to give to others? American society is centered on personal gain. The more you have, the more successful you are. This measurement leaves out a lot of important factors that measure not only your worth but your value to others. Joy and satisfaction often come from what you give to others, and the gain for you is not a monetary one but a spiritual one. Happiness comes from within. Seek opportunities to give to others.
All things each day provide us with the opportunity to find beauty and magic in all things. If you are spending your time destroying others or yourself, you are on the path to failure in reputation or feeling. If you know someone thirsty, give them a drink. If they are hungry, get them some food. If they are feeling low, treat them with kindness. If they need a friend, then be one to them.
Most of us were exposed to all of these values when we were young, but how many of our teachers and role models practiced them. This practice makes the lesson last and moves the action to a new generation.
You have total control over what type of day you will have. Is this a great day with the unbelievable potential for good? Or is this a day of boredom and perpetual letdowns? You are the one who decides the direction of your day and the course of your life, and your life will be what you make it.
“Dream as if you’ll live forever, live as if you’ll die today.” James Dean
“Doing what you like is freedom. Liking what you do is happiness.” Frank Tyger
“Be happy with what you have. Be excited about what you want.” Alan Cohen
“Life is a journey, and if you fall in love with the journey, you will be in love forever.” Peter Hagerty
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Maya Angelou
The conversation occurs subtly behind the actions of
the day. We are a massive part of one that we rarely take the time to analyze the tone or tenor of which we are speaking. This is self-talk, an ongoing dialogue inside your head that will contribute commentary on the happenings you experience. Too often, people accept the conversation, and it is most decidedly dripping with negativity. We tend to be extremely hard and give extremely harsh criticism, often crushing our confidence and self-esteem. Once a person becomes aware of this talk, though, they can consciously change their self-talk and start building a more positive self-image. This will change the way you look at yourself and how others look at you.
Why So Negative and Hard on Yourself?
In the development of life, there is programming that takes place. All people are given beliefs or programming through the early experience of their lives. Interactions with parents, siblings, relatives, friends, teachers, and the media, combine to let us know the rules of this game called life. Most of the messages are learned through pain, and we learn to want to avoid pain and seek pleasure. The talk in your head is generally geared to preventing foul, but things go a bit haywire.
The programming we experienced mainly was completed when we were between 5-10 years old and has become obsolete, outdated, or just plain untrue. When you start to notice this voice and see how negative it is, you can change your programming and not allow negative, stubborn, or defeatist thoughts to exist in your mind. You have the power to change, and it starts with a personal awareness of your thoughts. If you believe you are incapable of doing something, then you certainly will be. It is self-defeating, and most aren’t even aware it is happening.
Be Kind to You, Change the Self Talk
As you look at this conversation and hear the comments your mind is producing, ask yourself with each one, “Is this true?”, “Is this kind?” “Is this necessary?” If the comments are not all of these things, you should probably pay no mind to it.
How you treat yourself will be relevant to the experience you have in life. If a person will not treat themselves with respect, encouragement, and understanding, then who will?
Take a moment today and listen to re are your self-talk and decide if the conversation needs to change. All people are capable of quick and dramatic change in this area only by choosing to treat themselves better.
If you are not going to treat yourself in a caring and loving manner, why would anyone else?
Change from I can’t to I CAN
Change from No to Yes
Change from I have Doubts to I have no Doubts.
Change from Impossible to Possible
Change from I’m Unable to I Am Able
Stop expecting the worst and Demand the Best!
There is a positive opposite waiting to be noticed and used for every negative, self-defeating phrase you have ever spoken.
Every day we are responsible for making many choices. We make choices about how we feel about everything and everybody. When you lack money, what opportunity do you have? When you lack love, what choice do you have? When you require praise and recognition for your greatness, what choice do you have? That is what I am thinking about today. In all things, we have a choice, it is given to us when we are born, and our choices dictate the experience of our lives. It can be easy to forget. When things go wrong, our mind makes the choices leading to the current lesson. Our destiny is shaped in these moments, and we have to be responsible for it. Here are some thoughts on options and how they affect your life.
Choosing
For every choice, the opposite is always available. A negative to a positive, a yin to the yang of things. Here is a small list I read the other day.
I am choosing to love rather than hate.
This is a simple choice in dealing with all people and situations. No matter what another person does, you have this choice. Of course, you have this choice about yourself as well.
Choosing to laugh rather than cry.
You can look at all situations from a variety of directions. You can choose to look at the negative and cry or the positive and laugh. It is a choice that you will make each day, and it will color your life one way or another.
Choosing to create rather than destroy.
We build things up or tear them down, including ourselves and our precious self-esteem. All people have greatness within them, and it is up to you to decide to create from it or destroy it. You are in control of this. Take responsibility.
Choosing to persevere rather than quit.
This is a decision that we face in life from when we are children until we finally end life, hopefully in old age. To persevere and keep on trying our best to be what we are capable of. Or to give in and leave our passion and potential unfulfilled. Quitting can become a nasty habit if you aren’t careful. Perseverance is a talent.
I am choosing to praise rather than gossip.
It is just as easy to speak well of someone to talk negatively. Praise the people’s good qualities in your life to their faces and when they are not around. Gossip is poison to all involved. It is that chatter of a small mind. They are looking to tear someone down to build themselves else up. Praise all, and good things will come to you. It will start inside of you. Gossip and reap those “rewards.”
I am choosing to heal rather than wound.
This is a simple choice to be a force of wellness rather than destruction. All people have experienced pain, and your words and actions toward other people will heal or wound. The decision is all up to you. You don’t have to like everyone to approach them with a gentle understanding that heals rather than a harsh judgment that wounds.
Choosing to give rather than take.
What you give in life is most often what you receive in the end. If you choose to steal then, people will take from you. The act of stealing will lead to something else being stolen. Give freely, and all things will come to you. Steal selfishly, and all will be taken away. That is the way the world works.
Choosing to act rather than procrastinate
The action is the key to success. All the planning in the world and great ideas are nothing without the effort to make it all happen. Do things, try things, experiment, and look for a way to thrive. Do nothing, and nothing will ever happen. Action destroys fear and enlightens knowledge. You will know!
I am choosing to grow rather than to rot.
If you do not practice your talents and hone them, they will rot like a garden that is not being tended. If things are managed and cared for, you can yield delicious fruit, or the vegetables will rot on the vine if left alone. You are the one making the decisions for your garden, and I am the best.
I am choosing to pray rather than curse.
It doesn’t matter if you are religious or not; the act of silent contemplation is vital to growth and self-understanding. I don’t believe it matters how you get to this space, but it does matter that you get there. Recognize a force behind all of life. The magic that makes hearts beat and love occurs. It is a choice of being grateful for and loving life or looking to blame someone for any perceived difficulty. It is your choice to curse God or the universe about the challenges in your life or be grateful for the lessons and growth that always result.
I am choosing to live rather than to die.
Whether we are truly living or not is a decision that we make each day. The activities in life are unimportant to me. It is the appreciation we have for the present moment that counts. If you are looking at the past, you are not here. If you are worried about the future, you are not here. If you are not here, then you are not alive. Be here, see what is happening, appreciate the challenges and people you see. Even evil people can teach a valuable lesson. Learning lessons are what life is all about because that is growth. Death occurs when change doesn’t exist.
There are some choices you have every day. We are all responsible for the choices we make, and they are reflected in the value of our lives. The power is all inside you by making a choice each day.
“When you make a choice, you change the future.” ― Deepak Chopra
“Be as careful of the books you read, as of the company you keep, for your habits and character will be as much influenced by the former as the latter.”― Paxton Hood.
“What you choose also chooses you.” ― Kamand Kojouri
“You are creating through your choices, even now. Choose wisely.”― Bryant McGill.
“Faith is life, knowledge is death, and choosing the correct one is wisdom.”
I don’t know about you, but I have always wanted to have it all. I spent hours looking outside of myself to find the things I thought would make me whole. I didn’t see the things in my life where I did have it all and didn’t grasp it tight or even enjoy it at the moment because I spent too much time and energy looking ahead to what I might create in the future to see the power and the joy I created in life to enjoy. Looking back provides a 20/20 picture of what was and the mistakes you made in direction and choosing to take yourself out of a situation where you did have it all.
Childhood Adventure
Many people use their upbringing to excuse tough times and poor decisions as an adult, and admittedly I have done this when I look back at traumatic events. But what I failed to realize then was how good I had in life. I was raised by people who cared about me. I had the experience of having great lifelong friends and had many adventures on my own, which taught me a lot about myself and life.
I remember every summer of my youth being spent on the welcoming waters of Dyer’s Long Pond in Jefferson, Maine. It was there I learned to fish, swim, water ski, boat, and sometimes get hurt. Boys play hard and sometimes not so bright. I was able to develop my imagination during those times because we had little else to do. That tool has been one I have most appreciated over the years.
Each day was an adventure, and I was able to see my grandparents pretty much whenever I wanted. I could grow, run, and learn about life. I never went hungry or was left in unsafe circumstances. I was cared for by all my relatives and neighbors in my life. So many people showed me so much kindness that one thank you might be too small a sentiment to show my gratitude, but it is the only phrase I have. I had it all and never knew it.
Love and Light
I have been very fortunate in my life to find love not once but several times. Like many great things, too often, you don’t take the time to appreciate what you have when you are in it. I have become much better at this because I have seen the things which seem perfect and destined to be, fall apart and fade away into dust clouds of regret and loss.
I am not bitter because this is my path. I have chosen it as much as anyone wants anything. I was responsible for the people I decided to care about and the way it ended in most cases. I have also been responsible for keeping myself at a distance to feel safe. I remember being a young man in my early 20’s and thinking I had met “the one.” It was magical, and we had many fantastic times together. It was me that sabotaged that relationship, not her. We were in a situation where we were young and had our entire future to co-create in front of us, and I was afraid and didn’t speak of it. I just let it destroy the thing we had built. We had it all, and I never saw it. Sadly that isn’t the only time that has happened. These events may have occurred long ago or just a while ago, but they leave deep scars—very extensive wounds.
In The End
We all live our lives the best we can and try to find the best versions of ourselves. Too often, let petty emotions like jealousy and anger stemming from fear rule our decisions. It may seem that everything you want is out there, somewhere. But it all starts inside of you. You are looking at how you think and the actions you take. You choose to be brave, intelligent, kind, caring, and empathetic, or you don’t. That is on you and will define your life. I know too much of my time has been spent being selfish, self-centered, and afraid of allowing others to hurt me.
Even though life has been full of mistakes and times we should have appreciated more, we are still here and have a chance to have it all again in the next moment. This time to allow the wisdom of our past to guide us to a genuine appreciation of what we do have and the realization that we do have it all. That is a pretty good way to live.
“Don’t worry about a thing, ’cause every little thing is gonna be alright!”– Bob Marley.
“Take a deep breath and relax; it’s all going to turn out better than you expected.”
“Even the darkest night will end, and the sun will rise again.”– Victor Hugo.
“Keep your best wishes close to your heart, and watch as your world turns around.”– Tony Deliso.
Afternoons are the moments of the day that determine precisely what type of day it is going to be. Is it an active day where all things are accomplished? Is it a lower essential day where you relax and seek rejuvenation and activity? The day is begun with the hope and idealism of the morning, but the actions taken are in the afternoon and will determine if we follow through or put it off for another day. The afternoon is an important time for all things and people, and we have to learn to use that time of day. Life is like a day. As we move through it, the different stages bring different opportunities for success and other truths for people. My afternoons have always provided adventure and change, which has been the same in life. The afternoon has proven to be the best time of day.
No Need To Nap
From my earliest memories, I didn’t like the idea of taking a nap during the afternoon. It was a decent idea to provide extra rest, but to me, it was a waste of prime action time. During my youth, we lived in a camp on a lake in Maine. It was not fancy, rustic, but it provided me with the world’s most fabulous playground. I just wanted to use it, and sleeping would take away from what I could accomplish.
Some people enjoy that relaxing snooze after midday, which is excellent for them, but it is still when I could accomplish something. A workout could be done, a trail could be walked, thought could be written, or any other thing could be done. The sun is high; the opportunity for all things exists. It is not time to sleep. It is time to do. Go swim, go fishing or adventure to the small island in the middle of the lake. Do it all. There is plenty of time in the afternoon to accomplish whatever you want.
The Wisdom of the Morning
You also have the benefit of learning the lessons of the morning. You can now use each misstep you took or experience you learned earlier in the day to guide your steps to a more successful conclusion. The blind enthusiasm of the morning has turned into a practiced application of knowledge for the afternoon. One realizes that they don’t know everything, and there is an unlimited possibility of growth for all of your dreams. Challenges come, but you have the strength to work with it or around it if necessary.
Because you are wiser, the morning taught you about your enthusiasm and fundamental nature. Still, the afternoon allows you to rid yourself of the misguided ideas of yourself and, more importantly, others. You can take action as yourself without carrying the yoke of imagined expectations of others. You realize that you are free to be you in the afternoon because the day is not going to last forever. Living your life for someone else’s morals and expectations is living in a lie. The wisdom of the morning is only as powerful as the individual who chooses to wield it.
Nothing Lasts Forever
One of the powerful life lessons is that nothing lasts forever. No matter how good, strong, true, or successful you are, the afternoon will eventually end. Like the afternoons of my youth, as the time moved on, the shadows on the shores began to lengthen. At first, just a little, but then they grew longer and longer as the sun moved lower in the sky, and we all knew it was time to go home and end our adventures for that afternoon. We moved our way along the path to home, with a nostalgic excitement of having a great afternoon and knowing that more would come tomorrow.
It was time to move onto the evening of life, where darkness would overtake our playground, and the sounds of night slowly ramped up into our consciousness—the call of the lonely loon unseen on the lake. The constant peeping of a million frogs just beginning their adventure. The chorus of the night brought a time to reflect on the day’s accomplishments. There was never a moment then that I had a second of regret about the time I spent.
Sleep
It comes to us all at the end of the day, and if you did what you could that day, sleep would come quickly to you. It is a natural part of the day to move from one section to another, and just like the day, life shifts. In the end, recalling our day, we drift off into a peaceful slumber, knowing that in our afternoons, we took advantage of the sun, and made the most of our playground, and enjoyed the adventures that came our way.
New things enter our lives and teach us many things, but that is not the time to change anything. It is time to put it away and find the rest you have earned. But always recall with fondness the light of the afternoon and the power of potential that existed there for you—waiting merely to be called. Call.
“The late afternoon sunlight, warm as oil, sweet as childhood”-Stephen King
“Summer afternoon, summer afternoon; to me, those have always been the two most beautiful words in the English language”-Saul Bellow
“Thoroughly unprepared, we take the step into the afternoon of life. Worse still, we take this step with the false presupposition that our truths and our ideals will serve us as hitherto. But we cannot live the afternoon of life according to the program of life’s morning, for what was great in the morning will be little at evening and what in the morning was true, at evening will have become a lie.” -Carl Jung
Take action, there is no telling what will happen, but you know what will happen if you do nothing.
Many things have stopped people from taking action in life. There are dreams that people have wanted to chase that they thought about but left untested because taking action appeared just a little bit too scary or confusing. The lesson learned was clear that no matter what a person is dreaming of accomplishing or experiencing, it can only be realized by implementing action to do the thing and see what happens.
Each day, thousands of people look at their lives and have big dreams about what they would like to do, but the lack of action leaves these things in the fog of thought and out of the clarity of reality. Choosing to do things that are a part of that dream or bring that dream to life will allow you to realize your dream.
Action Time
Action can be taken at any time and will provide those who take it with many adventures and exciting experiences in life. Inventions will be invented, books will be written, and knowledge will be gained as soon as you decide to take action must happen. The best thing about it is that anyone, as far as I know, is capable of doing it. If you have been hesitant or fearful, taking action is the cure. Fear is erased with action because then, at least you know.
Many people can do great things and think great thoughts about how the world should be run or different businesses. All possess the capacity to take action on those thoughts and create them in this reality, yet very few do this.
Please Don’t Leave it for someone else.
Too often, we want to leave the chores to somebody else and conveniently forget that we are somebody else and can do everything. Why not us? Why don’t we take action and make the change? First, in our own lives and then to the benefit of others.
Gandhi was just a man living in India who saw racial injustice and remote control. He specialized in organizing non-violent protests that raised awareness of the cause and won the support of the world. Gandhi has been one of the most often quoted human beings from the 20th Century, and one of my favorites is, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” Meaning that if you want something to be different, then act like that yourself.
Some will read this and think that they don’t want to change the world or that they don’t want to lead a revolution. That is fine. Not everyone was cut out for that type of life, but is anyone too busy or too meek to institute an action in their lives that will provide a positive
These define your world
change?
Taking Action of Kindness
One of the most significant actions that a person can take is to perform an act of kindness. This positive feeling doesn’t have to cost money, and it doesn’t even have to take a lot of time. It merely has to be kind and thoughtful. Hello, and a smile to someone who feels like nobody cares can buoy their soul for an entire day. Giving someone a sincere compliment can make them feel better about how things are going. All of these acts, which are pretty small in the massive scheme of things, can be done by you every day. And without you, they will remain undone. The person who receives the compliment will continue to be sad, the person who needs a smile will be going without that human comfort, and your small actions can make a massive difference in someone else’s life.
When you move through your day and you see an opportunity to make the world a little better place, you can be the change and start taking action. In the most severe cases, one small, seemingly trivial act of kindness could save a life or, at the very least, make the experience a lot more pleasant for everyone you come in contact with but most importantly for yourself. It all begins with taking action.
“You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great.” ~ Joe Sabah
“Don’t be afraid to take a big step. You can’t cross a chasm in two small jumps.” ~ David Lloyd George
“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.” ~ Aristotle“
The superior man acts before he speaks, and afterward says according to his action.” ~ Confucius
“The superior man is modest in his speech but exceeds in his actions.” ~ Confucius
“You cannot score a goal when you are sitting on the bench. To do so, you have to dress up and enter the game.” ~ Israelmore Ayivor
There is the gratitude I feel for the downtimes, the darkness, and the sorrows of life. A thank you. That needs to be said and felt.
I heard it explained that without the night, the light of a candle would lose the value and unique power that its light provides. When I look back on less enjoyable times to experience, I can see the opportunity to shine within them. As a human being, the challenges life throws at you are tests that allow you to rise higher than you could without the problem or, unfortunately, a chance to be crushed by the difficulties you face.
When you have things in life that are not pleasant, it makes you appreciate it when things are going pleasantly. If you have had a time of loneliness, companionship feels all that much better. If you have had tough economic times, the gratitude for bountiful times is all the more significant.
One of the most challenging things to deal with is a fear of difficulties that may come in life. When you look at your life and think that everything is going well, it used to be a time when I would worry a lot. There was nowhere to go but down. Yet, worry didn’t stop problems, hardship, or poor decisions; it only made my enjoyment of the great things in my life more appreciated.
