Forgiveness has been a difficult thing for me at times. Realizing learning to forgive is one of the most important lessons a person can learn. I am continually analyzing why I have difficulty letting some things go and moving forward with life in a more positive way.

For most people who I carried low expectations, forgiveness comes more naturally. We are all learning life lessons when someone I expect more from fails me. I find it extremely difficult to forgive.

The things that other people do or have done hurt you and cause you to experience fear in your life. Fear that you will be harmed in some way or don’t measure up, or worry about what others might think of us. Part of the human condition is to experience pain; it teaches lessons and pushes us in directions that may not be easy to go. But there is a point where we have suffered enough and learned all we can. That is a time to forgive those we perceive to have harmed us. That is when we stop feeling angry or resentful toward someone for an offense, flaw, or mistake. The act of forgiveness will bring you many benefits.

Loss of Faith

You come to depend on certain people to be on your side and support you, no matter what. It is a cold lesson to find them acting differently from what you have seen over years of experience. Their hypocrisy is one of the most painful hurts because it is so unexpected, like a sucker punch from the Pope. It hurts twice and is more difficult to forgive because a deeply personal trust has been violated. Someone that you could always count on was now gone. Who or what can you trust if you can no longer trust them?

Forgiveness of the ones you cared about the most is most challenging to grant, but it is essential in the end. Your heart will never fully heal until you give this forgiveness, deserved or not, because your life needs to move forward, and casting off all of the anchors of wrongdoing, actual and perceived, is a must. Forgive and move forward; all people act the way they do because of their individual needs. Those we care about are special for a reason, and even though it is hard, forgiving them is a vital step in living a happy life.

Forgiving Others

We have all had people enter our lives who seem to be there to hurt us. These people have hurt us, taken from us, or caused general suffering in our lives. That is their problem and their karma in life. When we hold onto the act that hurts us, it eats away at our present moment happiness. If you are mad at the thought of that person and what they did to you, it is time to let it go. Time to forgive the people that have hurt you and move forward.

It is difficult to forgive because, in many ways, it feels like you are condoning the behavior that caused you any suffering. That is not the case, you do not accept the inadequate response from another, but forgiveness allows you to put the pain of the situation behind you and take away its control over you. Without the emotional charge you provide, an experience becomes something you can learn from and choose some value from. If only that, it can enhance your current life. Choosing to forgive also gives you power over all people and things in your past. You determine exactly how you feel about them and the emotions you attach to them.

Forgive You

One of the most challenging people to forgive is often ourselves. In life, we are going to make mistakes and misjudgments. We are going through this human experience for the first time, and it will have lessons for you to learn. Too many times, we take the lessons personally and allow them to become a part of our identity. This thought is never the case. A mistake is a mistake. Poor judgment is poor judgment. The wisest person in the world has made hundreds of errors. The difference between you and them is that they have learned the lesson and discarded the vehicle it came in.

You are a unique human being and have nearly unlimited potential to do what you dream of if you get out of your way. The way we talk to ourselves has a lot to do with our energy and the confidence developed in life. Only allow yourself to speak of yourself in the kindest ways. Don’t let your mind entertain thoughts that are derogatory to you in any way. Forgiveness of your past mistakes will make this possible and allow you to be confident in your current actions and build the most positive future possible.

Forgive It All

Whatever it is in life you think has caused your suffering and pain, forgive it. There are going to be things that cause us pain in life. Recognize that most of the pain we have allowed has been self-inflicted. Either we have had expectations of too rigid things, leaving a significant gap between what we expect to happen and reality. All of these gaps are going to be painful things. Forgive the situations and recognize that how we choose to think is the cause of much of our suffering. Changing how we feel about things is something all people can do at this very moment, and changing the way you think about an event will change the emotional attachment you have to it. Freedom from all of your past emotional messes is waiting for you with the simple act of heartfelt forgiveness. There is a power in forgiveness that will enliven your soul. 

“Forgiveness says you are given another chance to make a new beginning.” Desmond Tutu

“There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love.” Bryant H. McGill

“When you forgive, you in no way change the past – but you sure do change the future.” Bernard Meltzer

“Mistakes are always forgivable if one dares to admit them.”  Bruce Lee

Time to sail on to the future.

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