I don’t know about you, but finding happiness in life depends on my perceptions of things and the people around me. When you focus your actions around the things you can control (inside/out)and avoid letting the stuff outside of your experience, you can’t control the behavior you are living outside in. You will continually find yourself living at the whims of the things that happen to you rather than dictating what you would like to happen to you.
There seem to be two choices in life. Either I live from the outside in or from the inside out. The choice dictates how large the portion of happiness I experience at any particular time is. But what does it mean to live from the inside out? There are factors we can control in life and others outside of us that we do not. We are blessed with the choice of the outside or inside dominating our consciousness, so we control the amount of happiness we experience. Awesome!
From the Outside In Not Finding Happiness
Too often, We can find ourselves allowing the things and the people who come into our lives to dictate our mood. A great example of this would be when a 
person cuts you off in traffic, and you let that act affect your mood negatively, your anger rises, and you let your whole day get away from you. When we allow others’ decisions and choices to dictate our moods and actions, we are far from finding happiness in life. It can be the same as the people we care about. If they are in a bad mood for no fault of your own or are mad about something else, it is all out of your control.
That leads to me not taking responsibility for my life. It is too easy to send blame in the direction of whatever or whoever has changed my mood. I blame the traffic, blame the crowd, blame loved ones, or blame my friends. All of these are a cop-out because the only one who can choose to be angry or suffer because of someone else’s act is you. All you can control in this situation is your reaction to someone or something. Make sure it comes from a place of love. Finding happiness starts with accepting responsibility for our actions and lives, which means seeing the outside influences for what they are.
From the Inside Out
This is when you are at your best because the opposite of what is described above is happening. All thoughts and emotions about life events come from inside, and we choose their influence on us. We do not have to be angry unless we decide to be. There is no need to be frustrated unless we choose to be. We don’t have to let the non-stop external stimulus dictate our mood because the choices are made from our positive perspective, accepting full responsibility for all aspects of our lives. When your emotions radiate from inside yourself out, they will be more positive, and they will also radiate outward from you either positively or negatively.
This is the ultimate responsibility because when you choose the reactions that you experience, your true self is allowed to come through. Each of us has this ability, but it gets clouded through the lens of what society has told us is essential, rather than making decisions based on what we feel is right or wrong. There is no unhealthy attachment to things outside of you because you’re living from the thoughts, words, and actions inside of yourself.
You Are The Shot Caller for Finding Happiness
Living from the inside out allows us to be the best representation of ourselves that we can be. What the media tells you about how you should look no longer matters. Finding happiness does not come from what “they” tell you to do, be or look like; it isn’t relevant anymore. What they ask you to enjoy isn’t a part of your story anymore (unless you allow it), and you are becoming your best self if you pay attention to the thoughts and emotions that radiate from you.
You are responsible for your moods and emotions because what you think, say, and do comes from inside you and radiates in waves out into the world rather than the other way around. Your inner goodness is a force that needs to be shared with the world. We are all happier when we focus on what we can control and make good choices and leave the things we can’t control, helping ourselves and others find happiness. Please focus on the things you can manage and push them in the direction you want to go. You have no idea what power you possess until you focus on deploying it in a valuable and vital way from the inside out.
“You can’t teach anybody anything, only make them realize the answers are already inside them.”
– Galileo Galilei
“How soon will you realize that the only thing you don’t have is the direct experience that there’s nothing you need that you don’t have?”
– Ken Keyes, JR
“Uncertainty is the only certainty, and knowing how to live with insecurity is the only security.”
— John Allen Paulos
“If the only thing people learned was not to be afraid of their experience, that alone would change the world.”
— Sydney Banks
“I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.”
— Maya Angelou
mindset in life seems desirable. Simply because whatever you want to achieve or add to life is there for the taking once you set your mind. You have to be willing to work for it and build improvement. More than just the accomplishment results, it leads to an enjoyment of life that you can experience doing even the simplest of tasks.
isn’t just the learning. And it’s the process of learning that is fun and exciting and allows you to move your mind, body, and spirit into new experiences.
provide joy; it is the steps along the way. Find joy in these moments, and perfection doesn’t matter. What is perfection but worrying about how something looks to someone else? We are never what other people think of us. We are a collection of our experiences, and ignoring these real things for an idea that never exists seems to be the definition of insanity.
wants to suffer, but suffering has a place in life. It provides motivation. Look at your situation as a step in the journey, not the destination.
Life is full of experiences, some may be more pleasant to experience than others, but they all have merit and are designed to teach you something. If you are continually experiencing the same thing, perhaps you are just too dense to grasp the lesson. This was profound, and not surprisingly, those situations stopped occurring.