Tag Archives: accept others

Leaving Judgement behind

judgementWhy We Judge

It can be easy to look at someone else’s life and quickly dissect all they are doing wrong or at least be doing better. Their lives seem like a simple puzzle; they are too lazy, too rich, too poor, don’t care enough, or care too much. People look so quickly and coldly that they never really see the harm that judgment can do to their lives.

It is negative energy, which will never be a good thing. Acceptance is the key to positive relationships in life. If you are looking for happiness, then judgment needs to be avoided at all costs. Who are we to judge someone else? There is no more precise definition of where you are in your journey than how you judge someone else. Or perhaps how much you misjudged someone else. 

Hiding In Plain Sight

So why do we all have such an inclination to participate in something that is clearly detrimental to our lives in every way? One of the reasons is that when we direct our attention and others’ attention outward toward someone else and their behavior, the poor decisions and mistakes you have made are overlooked. Isn’t there a safe feeling inside when you say, “I may be struggling, but I am not struggling that much?”  So our judgments are constantly distracting attention away from our weaknesses. Does that make your weaknesses any less real?

Putting someone else down with judgments automatically puts you in a position above whomever decisions are being thrown at. It defines you because you focus on distractions rather than working on your problems and becoming a better person yourself. Your concerns are still simmering in the background, waiting to boil over.  It is impossible to be happy when you know an explosion is coming. And there is an explosion of chaos coming your way.  

Defining Ourselves

It will come down to the choices that we make each day when it comes to judgment. You have the option to be more accepting of others and their challenges because, in reality, it is not any of judgment 3456your business.  The choice to look at yourself honestly and work on your decisions, thoughts, feelings, and actions is a daily struggle that you need to start to pay attention to.

We define ourselves for the world in each thought we have and each word we speak. There is an illusion that nobody sees our weaknesses in our minds if we create a big enough cloud of dust by speaking in judgment about others.  Not your circus, not your monkeys. You will decide whether your meanness and judgment define you or kindness, love, and acceptance. It is that simple. When you judge someone else, you are clearly defining yourself, and you are ignoring your areas that are in significant need of improvement.

I used to worry a lot about what other people thought of me. Now I am much more concerned with what I think of others and how I look at their behavior and try not to take their terrible actions personally. It is a reflection on them and has little bearing on me.

When you judge another, you do not define them. You define yourself.~ Wayne Dyer

Are you judging or accepting today?

 “When someone judges you, it isn’t actually about you. It’s about them and their insecurities, limitations, and needs.” Lulu

“Never judge someone by the opinion of others.” Anonymous

“Be curious, not judgemental.” Walt Whitman

 “Everyone has untold stories of pain and sadness that make them love and live a little differently than you do. Stop judging; instead, try to understand.” Anonymous

“I don’t judge others.” Sarah Jessica Parker

 

The Right Things

How often do people take action without really thinking about the consequences? I am sure that I am called on to take action, speak, or make some other behavioral choice thousands of times in my daily life.  It would be challenging to be fully conscious of all choices. From what to wear to how you get to work, our subconscious handles many decisions.  But too often, we allow interactions with others to occur without our conscious participation.  These actions can come off without any caring or concern for the feelings of others.  For us to be present in these interactions, we can follow a few points of focus to make sure we are entirely present in the moment and with people that matter.

Honoring Actions

Each action we take involving others is going to affect them. It doesn’t matter the scope and scale of your activity. It will have a positive or negative effect on those that you interact with. More importantly, each step you choose to take will affect you as well.  If you treat somebody poorly, for any reason, it resonates with you and will determine your energy and experience.

The focus of your conscious thought should be on honoring yourself.  In all that you do and think during the day, make the first choice to accept yourself.  Even if you believe someone else deserves your scorn or ridicule, it doesn’t do you any good to participate in this. Let it go and focus on the positive things in your life.  Putting others down puts you down.  Make choices honoring you, and the world will acknowledge you.  That is the benefit of focusing on creating honoring actions.

Release Judgment

It is a simple choice. The judgment of other’s personal lives, heritage, clothing, physical appearance, or any other thing is never going to end well for you.  Our instincts have developed over thousands of years, and we identify with people similar to ourselves because it is safe to do so. In our ancestral past, our survival depended on it.  But that is not the case today. We find others’ judgment is addictive to us and allow us to prop ourselves up in self-esteem in some way, on the backs of others.

Release judgment from your mind and learn to accept all of those who are different from you. Letting others live how they feel comfortable will allow you to live as you feel comfortable with yourself.  Make the conscious choice to respect others and live with a sense of compassion toward them.  Your actions will come back to you in the end. To live in judgment is to bring judgment upon you. Respect and kindness will also come back to you.  It is your choice which energy you release into the world and receives back from it.

Acceptance

The more you choose love for and the approval of others and their situations, the better energy your life will experience. By accepting this path, you are deciding against fear and all of its negative energies.  Whoever you hold negative feelings about, let them go.  Those from another region of the world practice a different religion, are economically challenged, addicted to drugs, or just making poor decisions. Let go of your judgment.

Choose to be more conscious of your thoughts and the right actions you can take daily to make the world a better place.  Let go of the vision that you are in competition with everyone else and choose to see the positive benefits of cooperation between all people. You can make all interactions a blessing to yourself with your attitude.  Acceptance of yourself and others as they are on the path to doing this.

Work for Today

So focus on your thoughts and actions today and see where they are going to lead you.  Are they taking you down a negative path or a positive one?  Are your choices making the world better or worse for someone else?  Are your options honoring yourself? This action is the beginning of being more conscious about your effect on the planet and taking responsibility for that experience.