Tag Archives: becoming better

21

The Way You Think

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Attitude- a settled way of thinking or feeling about someone or something, typically reflected in a person’s behavior.

How do you settle in the way you think about things? Our attitudes are the perspectives through which we view life. Our opinion about anything will define the emotions we feel about that thing. It will also determine the joy, success, anger, or failure we will experience. Everything around you and what you are doing in life will be affected. Your emotions are a result of your beliefs and how you define things in your life.  Our actions are going to be determined by our emotional state.  For example, if you set your job as something you hate or something to get through, the way you perform the job will reflect that. Your attitude determines everything. The same is true if you love what you do.  That joy will reflect in your duties around work.

Your actions will reflect this to the world in the way you act throughout your day. Each person should examine their attitudes today, the ones we have about all the things you can experience, and see how they affect your behavior and actions in all things. It begins with the thoughts you entertain about something, the emotions naturally attached to those thoughts, the words used to express your ideas to the world, and the actions you take that show your attitude.

Good Attitude Equals Success

When you set out to achieve anything, your attitude should be one of the first investments you make.  A positive attitude will allow you the motivation and persistence to overcome obstacles or to see around them to achieve the things in your dreams. A negative belief about doing something, yourself, or your abilities will make your goal challenging to accomplish. Assess your thoughts at the start of any project and make sure it is on the positive side. Then follow it through to the successful conclusion.

What makes a positive attitude? The belief is that whatever we are endeavoring to accomplish is worthwhile and will lead us to a better life.  If we believe it will bring more joy and satisfaction in our lives. Having confidence in what you are doing and a strong desire to experience that thing will allow you to create and maintain a positive attitude. With this attitude will come success and accomplishment. If you are not feeling optimistic about something you are doing, look at your approach and either make adjustments to the positive or abandon the project. There is no point in pursuing something, making you unhappy, angry, or sad. Just as the right attitude will bring success, the results of a poor posture are just as sure.

Where Attitudes Come From

An attitude is a part of us, but it develops over time.  Each experience we have shaped it, and our view of the world and ourselves is no accident.  Our practical knowledge builds our beliefs, and those beliefs reside in our subconscious mind, dictating behavior. These beliefs will influence, design, and control all of our attitudes about everything we do. If we believe we are “always bad at math,” our attitude toward doing the math will improve, and the results of any math-oriented things will be terrible because of it. So we become a self-fulfilling prophecy, and our attitude will lead the way in our failure. Changing that course is not easy, but it isn’t complicated either.

The first thing that has to happen is that you need to identify the places your beliefs are lacking. What do you believe about making money? Look at your attitudes. What do you think about your ability to succeed and accomplish things? What do you think about your talents, skills, intelligence, creativity, or other critical factors? Identify the beliefs that limit you and then endeavor to change them. Changing an idea requires a little reprogramming, but consistent effort can get it done. If you can change your mindset, you can change your attitude and, therefore, accomplish anything.

Good Attitudes

Building the right attitude involves an awareness of where you are at in life. More often than not, no activity or accomplishment in life will go smoothly without a hitch. A positive attitude will provide a person with the perspective in achievement to see the opportunities on the horizon and keep moving toward them despite the little potholes of life we have to get through. When your attitude is on the positivity of the accomplishment, nothing will deter you. Not the negative programming of your past or the negative moods of those around you today.

A positive attitude will allow you to keep your eye on the prize and get you moving toward that kind of accomplishment. Liking the goal and having faith in your ability to accomplish it is enough to pull you over, around, or through anything that might get in your way. A positive attitude will allow this to be the life case. Remember a time you accomplished something others thought you couldn’t. Attitude carried you or, conversely, stopped you.  How has your mood written your story?  How does it continue to write it?

Positive Attitude Builders

Look at the people you choose to surround yourself with in life. Either they are positive or negative factors in your achievement. The influence of a positive person will fuel you.  It will provide a good push toward success.  Like fuel in a car, the positive cohort makes everything run well. And often, encouragement is all you need to keep you moving forward and stop you from losing focus or heart in achieving your goals and becoming what you want to be.

The detrimental effect of negative people will be harmful to your attitude and limit what you can do. How many goals and dreams have died a horrible and premature death because of negative thoughts? It can be challenging to believe in an idea if the people around you tell you it can’t possibly happen. Limit or remove these influences from your life because you will never be your best, carrying the negative baggage negative people try to pile on you.  It is hard enough to find your path in the best situation. Don’t let the influence of negative people make it harder.

Your attitude needs to be a creation of you and not someone else. Learn to believe in yourself, and all you can do and all you dream of is reachable.

Honest Evaluation

Honestly, look at your attitudes about the things in your life. Look at what you believe about yourself and the way the world works. Your attitudes are a direct reflection of these beliefs. If they do not positively serve you, you need to change your beliefs and develop new ones that will allow you to live your best life. It all starts with looking at your thoughts today and recognizing those you are giving your attention to. Acknowledge the emotions that stem from these thoughts and the words you use to express them to the world. Finally, the actions you are taking because of your attitudes about life. They will define you and what you can accomplish in life.

“A ship is always safe at shore, but that’s not what it’s built for.” —Albert Einstein

“Some people want it to happen. Some wish it would happen. Others make it happen.” —Michael Jordan

“The question isn’t who is going to let me; it’s who is going to stop me.” —Ayn Rand

“Scar tissue is stronger than regular tissue. Realize the strength, move on.” —Henry Rollins

“The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.” —Steve Jobs

 

21

Favorite Things

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I have learned a few things throughout my life to assist me in navigating the sometimes stormy waters I have encountered. They aren’t tricky in concept and have proven useful when the challenges of existence come my way.  As we all know, there are always two-sided to life. It will bring you decisive, secure, happy moments, but along with each of those will come challenges that will bring you growth. These things we feel we could do without, but these things have a purpose. They allow us to grow beyond where we are right now in this moment.  “What is this trying to teach me?” 

I am sure we can all do without the suffering moments, loss, and sadness in life. The bitter provides value to the sweet.  You can try to prepare yourself to handle the tough times and persevere in life and not have the unexpected challenges of life bury you alive when they hit. You lose a job, a relationship ends, someone passes away, or even a natural disaster hits.  You will either grow from these things or be beaten by them. Don’t be beaten. Use these little weapons to help you win.

Foul Weather Gear

Foul weather gear is a term I picked up from some friends of mine many years ago. They raced a boat on the ocean for fun and took me out for a sail quite often. The experience was excellent, and I enjoyed the gentle waves on the sea on a bright, warm summer day.  It was relaxing and utterly enjoyable. Life is often like this. But……Sometimes though, the weather will turn, and it isn’t so lovely, and it rains hard, and the winds are no longer favorable but merciless, which can be quite dangerous. When the storm hits is when you break out your foul weather gear, and it will help you make it through the storm and enjoy the ride as much as possible. It is a measure we should all take in life. Life often seems like a sunny day with beautiful weather, but a storm can arise out of nowhere. It is always good to have foul weather gear at hand, just in case.

Some people are so attached to the sunny day and calm sail they will never see the joy and excitement that comes from the harsher weather heading your way — this chance to use your wits and develop your skill on the boat. You can grow as an individual and with the crew as well. There may be some danger, but life is full of uncertainty. It allows us to learn to deal with it.

Life Gives What We Need

In a perfect world, we would always find an immediate reward for good behavior and positive actions. And those who treat people poorly and make decisions that harm others would be immediately punished. But that is not how things work. If you look at the short game, life will never seem fair.  But when you look at the extended play, it appears that all things work out exactly as they should. Those who live their lives based on fear have little joy and happiness, and those who live in love are happy and enjoy life. Never expect life to give you everything you ever wanted on a silver platter, it won’t, and you will spend your time wallowing in self-pity if that is what you expect. But life will allow you the chance to grow and become the best person you can be in all areas.  Never worry about the fairness of life, worry about your ability to deal with what you face, and making positive decisions based on kindness, caring, understanding, acceptance, and love. This ability will allow you to see the long game of your life because that is all that matters.  Life gives us all an equal opportunity to become our best, so it is the ultimate level of fairness.

Practice Kindness

There are no situations where practicing kindness can hurt anything and always contributes to a better day for those you practice kindness. Sometimes we get wrapped up in our desires and feelings, and the fear of not getting what we want or feel we need can diminish our mood and make us less a lower version of ourselves. Negative thoughts make us move around in a bad mood, and we distribute negative energy to all folks we encounter that day.

Viewing the world from the scope of what we can do for others rather than what we can do for ourselves will benefit all involved, including the world in general.  Look at your expectations for the day, see what you seek for yourself, and then look for the simple things you can do to make someone else’s day a little brighter. Kindness is easy to practice because it feels good to be kind. Put other people first and treat the world with that attitude, and it will generally treat you that way too.

Build Your Body

Exercise is a choice, and participating in it regularly will bring you many benefits. It is suitable for the functioning of your body in heart, mind, and spirit daily, and that by itself is enough. Along with a sensible diet, it will help you maintain a healthier weight and feel better in overall health.  But there is also another benefit that many don’t contemplate.

When tragedy comes into your life, you will be mentally and physically able to handle things better.  Many people have their lives jump off the rails at the slightest bump of adversity.  Working out teaches you to reach deep inside yourself and know that there is a strength to do what you have to do, even if sometimes you don’t want to.  Without a consistent exercise regimen, I think that we tend to move to the soft side and become vulnerable. Whatever training and physical activity resonate with you, participate in it.  Lifting, jogging, biking, yoga, martial arts, or any other type of exercise will provide you strength inside and outside.

Find Moments of Quiet

It is in the moments of quiet that you can hear yourself. Take time to find the places in life where you can get your mind to stop making noise and listen to the natural inner guidance we all have. Experience provides us with many rules and expectations that teach us what society expects from us, but they don’t help our soul express itself in the way one needs. To follow this inner guidance, we need to quiet the mind and stop chasing the world’s expectations. Listen to the inner voice that exists in each of us.  The sound is your intuition, and it is much wiser than your thoughts will ever be.

Don’t ignore your intuition because of the thoughts you think about the fears and expectations of the world.  Find the quiet and ask simple questions and follow the answers you hear. It sounds simple, but it takes commitment because as soon as you get a response, your mind will kick back in with a million objections and doubts. What will people think? How can that work? Will we lose the respect of others?  Those we love will judge us harshly.  Nobody will understand. Soon the right answer seems like an impossible challenge.  It is much easier to maintain the status quo, but it isn’t very fulfilling. Life brings a growth experience and avoiding growth leads to atrophy and death.  Listen to your inner voice.

Meditation

Taking on meditation is a great way to calm your mind and stop the constant chatter. There are many misconceptions about the practice, it is not difficult, and it is not religious. It is a tool to work with your mind and the thoughts you have rather than be bowled over by it. It can also help you find a way to deal with your emotions more healthily.  Since we get very little guidance in our lives on how to do this, meditation has been a savior to me in making sense, accepting, and moving past the inevitable negative emotions which arise from life.

There are many different ways to meditate; to me, there is no wrong way. You will be able to find guided meditations easily. I use an app on my phone called Insight Timer, and there are many others.  They offer a chance to be conducted in a direction you need to work on, or you can use their timer with ambient sound and focus on your breathing.  Whatever method resonates with you and helps you live a healthier life is a good thing to do. Give it a try. You will only find positives.

These are a few little thoughts to make life a more enjoyable experience.  Keep your foul weather gear handy and ride out the storm. Understand life is a long game, it may seem unfair at the moment, but it all equals out in the end. As long as your alive, there is a chance for a comeback.  Kindness is always the right choice. If you are questioning whether or not understanding will work, practice compassion.  Find your moments of quiet, just for you, because you deserve it. We all need to contemplate the things which make us feel fulfilled, what steps to take next, and where our power lies. To that end, give practicing meditation a chance. It can allow you to tame the negative thoughts and produce a positive force of action in your life. Be physical, and take care of your body in some way. You only get one of them, and it will take you as far in life as you let it.

Keep these tools at your disposal, and they will help you overcome the hard times and answer the question: What is this trying to teach me?

 

7

My Magical Commute Time

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I gather knowledge every day to enjoy my life it is the process of learning new things I can apply to my life experience to understand how and why events and occurrences in my life affect me the way they do.  I have a burning desire to know why I feel and react as I do to other people and the things they do. Unfortunately I had a problem.  I had so little time for learning and thinking about constructive things. I currently work quite a bit and that takes up much of my daily allotted time.  Throw in a daily workout routine and there isn’t a lot of down time.  I  Also have writing to do daily, which is mostly a reflection of my thoughts. I needed to find a way to input new information to gain understand of, think about and write about ultimately.  My commute each way to work is about 35-40 minutes depending on traffic.  When I stopped using this time for thinking about the past to learning new things my life improved immensely.

The problem with Music

Unfortunately I needed permanent solutions and that takes more knowledge

From the moment I first got my license as a teenager, I enjoyed cruising down the road listening to music I liked, singing along and feeling free and happy on the open road. This developed into a habit I couldn’t break.  Most people are this way I think. Music is a great escape, it allows you to feel, think and remember.  I know music transports me to places in my past and reminds me of people and things in the past. And that is a nice thing once in awhile, but you don’t need to do that every day.

I found that my thoughts on my commute would turn to things that were gone and thoughts would arise about people and things from the past and with every thought is tied a corresponding emotion. I was continuously bringing emotions to the forefront which were not healthy to dwell on and I wondered why. I would hear a song and think of the mistakes I made in life and many days I would arrive at my destination with a negative mindset. No way to start your day for sure.  But then I started to learn.

Simple Thoughts, Big Results

One of my biggest challenges is to understand how this human experience is supposed to work.  I made the simple commitment to spend my commute time listening to something which had some sort of educational value to it. I honestly let the Universe decide most days what I am going to listen to and have not been disappointed. I have found learning breeds a positive frame of mind and it carries throughout my day.  As I contemplated the thoughts of many intelligent and insightful people, I know I have become more intelligent and insightful as well. It is a feeling of unlimited possibility.

Learning is only part of the equation because once you learn then you can’t help but take action to make your life a more enjoyable experience. When you know a better way to do something than you did before, it makes no sense not to change your ways and become more efficient and in many ways a better person. Knowledge is the great equalizer for all people, and the great thing about the world is we have access to a vast library of knowing material at the touch of our fingers. And transformation on a daily basis can happen. It has for me.

Thoughts are The Thing

How often do you contemplate the tenor and value of your thoughts? Where do they come from? What comes with them?  These are the very basic things that create your reality day to day.  We create about 70,000 thoughts per day and about 95% of them are the same thing we thought the day before and the day before that. Unoriginal thoughts on a loop which lead to a routine of behavior with no real consciousness driving it.  There of course is value in subconscious programming, we would have to learn how to drive, talk, tie our shoes, etc. every day without the ability but to be able to draw a line between these two is the thing.  Learning is a way to increase the number of conscious, new and creative thoughts you think every day.

Each time a new idea comes into your mind, you contemplate it and your consciousness grows and you will be forced to look at things in a different way and to gain understanding of the events of your past through this new lens of perspective.  That is a very good thing because to understand yourself, I think you need to gather as much knowledge as possible to be able to get comfortable with our lives.  We all have a set of likes and dislikes which drive our behavior.  To know why one feels the way they do gives you the power to control your emotions better and deal with the challenges life puts in your way much more constructively. Learn and grow!

Learn Something New Today

I share this story about learning on my magical commute because I want other people to be able to enjoy some of the same epiphanies I have had. Your interests and motivations may be different from mine but learning is a good thing and improving yourself and your knowledge base improves the world.  One person who is more enlightened will lead to a better life, a more positive attitude, and that will not only make your life better but the lives of all people you come in contact with better as well.  I challenge you to learn something new today and every day for the rest of your life.  Become more conscious in your thinking and try to understand yourself and in that search you will understand others a bit better as well.  Life is a short commute when you think about it , and learning provides more value to you.

Some of he things I learned about this week:

Journalling as a Tool for Success

Neurohacking: Rewiring your Brain 

The Path To Awakening Yourself | Dr. Shefali Tsabary

How to Get Beyond Yourself to Create Your Own Destiny | Dr. Joe Dispenza

Jim Rohn – FOCUS ON ONE THING (Jim Rohn Motivation)

How the Mind Influences Reality

These are just a few of the many I have listened to and learned from. I also use audio books and a great site called optimize which gives your 20 minute summaries of many of the most powerful books in history.  Learn and grow to be your best.