Fire is an element that represents many things to many different people. To me, it has a symbol of purification. This is because when I looked into the fire, I saw the future ahead of me and the past was left behind.
The Significance of the Fire
There needs to be a bit more explanation than that I suppose. In life, there are people who come into your life and cause only a ripple in the large tangle of life’s experience. Then there are those that are destined to leave a deep emotional crater, that you are destined to carry in your life. How much and how long you carry it is up to you.
I started the fire for purification purposes. It needed to be done, a weeding out of cluttered possessions that served no purpose other than to remind me of things that were gone. As long as I held these things, there was the hope in the back of my mind that they would somehow summon those ghosts from the deathly slumber of their existence. It was time for a funeral, it was time for purification.
A Picture is Worth…………….
Pictures burned as memories drift into the sky, never to be seen again.
The pyre I started was solely for me to observe and as the preparatory flames burned I said a silent goodbye and started to cleanse my existence of those memories. It was the pictures that went first. Each happy moment of fake smiles and skin deep beauty were at first singed and then ever so slowly erased from existence. As they went all of the lies, jealousy and foolishness went with them. Watching them go one by one was fascinating. Playing back entire years of events. Then wiping them and their cursed impact away. As the last fake image of yesterday disappeared into the either, candy swirled emotions of relief and fear engulfed me.
Possessions Mean Little to Me
Then it was time for the things. Things that at one time held a vat of feelings and memories of special moments that will never be lived again. Knowing that there was a beauty in the world was great, but knowing that beauty can cut you deep and leave you with nothing but scars and disappointment. Onto the fire went the every single thing that had ever been given or held any attachment whatsoever. Some of them burned well and caused the fire to burn ever higher. Some did not, there was a bottle from a special occasion, that only the label disappeared in the wall of flame.
Your Words Showed Their Value
Last and not least were the words. Words are empty when the emotions that once supported them. Now they are like the crack of a whip every time you read them and realize that they are no more. Let them go, place them in the fire. Read one final time and destroyed forever. That is the way of relationships that are born in the fire. They are often ended by the fire. How else could it possibly be?
The cleansing was over, the end had come. The fire went out, the past was gone with its last searing growing ember. Never to be mentioned again in conversation, but the scars remain, not only from the past but from the first moment I looked into the fire.
“I have had a happy life and thank the Lord. Goodbye and may God bless all!”
— Chris McCandless’ journal from Alaska
The other day I happened to come across this movie called Into The Wild. I had no idea what it was about or that it was based on a “true” story. I started watching it and there seemed to be a lot of problems for this kid, Chris McCandless growing up, the movie portrays his parents as not so nice people and because of this, he was propelled to give up his identity, his money and hike off across the country to find some inner truth. Two things struck me about this movie as I watched it. First, either this kid was out of his tree crazy, or he was brilliant and had a large supply of courage. Into the WildTravel Biographies & Memoirs)
Secondly, was the soundtrack which was performed mostly by Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam fame, and I have to say, it is outstanding. Made me remember that I really loved Pearl Jam and the music, well listen for yourself, I will put the videos at the end of this.
For those of you who don’t know the story here is a brief account:
Chris McCandless Story
Into the Wild is the story of Christopher McCandless, aka Alexander Supertramp, who chose a life on the road in the early 1990s after graduating from Emory University. He hitchhiked, hopped freight trains and backpacked throughout the American West before hitchhiking to Alaska in summer of 1992. It was there in the Alaskan bush near Denali National Park that Chris McCandless died in an abandoned bus, having lived off the land before a series of tragic events caused his death by starvation.
Kind of Creepy Picture of the Real McCandless in front of his bus
Chris’ story was told by Jon Krakauer in the bestselling book,Into the Wild, originally published in 1997 in response to the popularity of Krakauer’s article on McCandless in Outside magazine. The book was adapted for the screen by Sean Penn, who also directed. Actor Emile Hirsch plays Christopher McCandless. The film also stars:
Marcia Gay Harden (Billie McCandless), William Hurt (Walt McCandless), Jena Malone (Carine McCandless), Vince Vaughn (Wayne Westerberg), Catherine Keener (Jan Burres), Hal Holbrook (Ron Franz), Kristen Stewart (Tracy).
Now I warn you that Chris McCandless is a lightning rod for people to complain about. You don’t have to look very far online to find people that claim you shouldn’t romanticize and make McCandless a heroic figure, because it is making a hero out of a crazy person or a fool. Their words not mine. There is much worse out there, claiming he could have hiked ten miles in the opposite direction to find safety, or a few miles up or down stream to get across the river and save himself. There are also many accounts that McCandless had a reputation for doing foolish things his entire life and almost killed himself numerous times. I do not know if any of this stuff is true or not, but I do know that the story is inspirational as told by Sean Penn and it’s hard to watch it without it affecting you. I mean, how many people live their entire life and never take a chance on anything? Ever? The story ends with McCandless’ death but the idea lives on, that life is to be lived and not survived. It made me wonder if I had ever done anything even remotely heroic, ever in my life. I recommend you watch it and judge for yourself.
“So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greather joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.”
Chris McCandless quote
“There is a pleasure in the pathless woods:
There is a rapture on the lonely shore:
There is society, where non intrudes.
By the deep sea, and music in it’s roar:
I love not man the less, but nature more…….” Lord Byron
Watch the videos below you’ll be glad you did.
Society
Two years he walks the earth.
No phone, no pool, no pets, no cigarettes. Ultimate freedom. An extremist. An aesthetic voyager whose home is the road. Escaped from Atlanta. Thou shalt not return, ’cause “the West is the best.” And now after two rambling years comes the final and greatest adventure. The climactic battle to kill the false being within and victoriously conclude the spiritual pilgrimage. Ten days and nights of freight trains and hitchhiking bring him to the Great White North. No longer to be poisoned by civilization he flees, and walks alone upon the land to become lost in the wild.
— Alexander Supertramp
Hard Sun
Probably the best: Rise
“So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun.”
— Chris McCandless
“The core of mans’ spirit comes from new experiences.”
— Chris McCandless
“Rather than love, than money, than faith, than fame, than fairness… give me truth.”
— Chris expanded on the original quote by Henry David Thoreau
“Greetings from Fairbanks!
This is the last you shall hear from me Wayne. Arrived here 2 days ago. It was very difficult to catch rides in the Yukon Territory. But I finally got here. Please return all mail I receive to the sender.
It might be a very long time before I return South. If this adventure proves fatal and you don’t ever hear from me again, I want you to know your a great man. I now walk into the wild. Might be a very long time before I return South…
I now walk into the wild.”
— Chris McCandless, in postcard sent to Wayne Westerberg in Carthage, South Dakota, from Alaska
“…henceforth will learn to accept my errors, however great they be…”
— Chris McCandless’ journal from Alaska, written weeks before he died
“I have had a happy life and thank the Lord. Goodbye and may God bless all!” — Chris McCandless’ journal from Alaska
“It should not be denied… that being footloose has always exhilarated us. It is associated in our minds with escape from history and oppression and law and irksome obligations, with absolute freedom, and the road has always led West.”
— Wallace Stegner
“I want to go up to them and say Stop,
don’t do it— she’s the wrong woman,
he’s the wrong man, you are going to do things
you cannot imagine you would ever do.”
— Sharon Olds, May 1937
(In the movie, Chris reads this to his sister, Carine, outside the restaurant)
Fire is an element that represents many things to many different people. To me, it has a symbol of purification. This is because when I looked into the fire, I saw the future ahead of me and the past was left behind.
Then it was time for the things. Things that at one time held a vat of feelings and memories of special moments that will never be lived again. Knowing that there was a beauty in the world was great, but knowing that beauty can cut you deep and leave you with nothing but scars and disappointment. Onto the fire went the every single thing that had ever been given or held any attachment whatsoever. Some of them burned well and caused the fire to burn ever higher. Some did not, there was a bottle from a special occasion, that only the label disappeared in the wall of flame.
Last and not least were the words. Words are empty when the emotions that once supported them. Now they are like the crack of a whip every time you read them and realize that they are no more. Let them go, place them in the fire. Read one final time and destroyed forever. That is the way of relationships that are born in the fire. They are often ended by the fire. How else could it possibly be?
Fire and Emotions
