It is said that as we remember the events of our lives, what we really remember is only bits and pieces of the entire picture. Our memories are colored by our own prejudices and experience, we basically remember what we want to remember, and it is not always the most accurate retelling of events. I try to keep this in mind, as I remember the summer of 1982 and playing Babe Ruth Baseball for the Damariscotta Lions. It was one of the most purely fun events I ever participated in.
Damariscotta Lions 1982: left to right: front: Tom Wright, Jason Cray, Brian Farrin, Mike Genthner, Chris Perry, and Gordon Fletcher. Back: Coach Tom Burnham, Eric Leeman, Bruce Farrin, Jon Hilton, David Hanna, Shane Creamer and Coach Dana Bond
In the summer of 1982 I had just finished my freshman year in high school, and was I think pretty typical for that time. When I look at all of the sports specialization that goes on today, and the over parenting and over coaching of kids, it is with deep appreciation I look back on the experience of being a part of this team. We had two coaches, who at the time were in their 20’s, Tom Burnham and Dana Bond clearly had a love of the game and wanted to teach the game of baseball. I don’t remember many specifics about the game. I know I was allowed to play most positions on the field at some point, during the season, playing the bulk of my time at second base, but also playing third, first, catching and all the outfield positions.
I remember the focus was on winning and having fun. That is what I remember. Perhaps that was the main focus or perhaps because we won all our games it was fun. Who knows which, but I know that I couldn’t have looked more forward to playing. Double header against Wiscassett? No problem. Play two or three position get eight to ten at bats and win two games. Sounds like a great day for me.
Trying to remember specific things is difficult at this time. They don’t really matter now, only the complete mosaic counts. I think that many people on that team have positive memories of the experience. There was no complaining by the players or the parents about positions or playing time. In fact I can’t recall any negative experience at all during that season. All of the parents supported every kid and since we usually had nine and some times eight, we still managed to win. I remember we won one game with only eight active players after one of our guys got ejected for throwing his bat. All I can say is he didn’t mean to. I ended that game playing center-left field.
It may be impossible for sports today to ever provide that type of experience. You would have to have a group of individuals who were not under any pressure other than to do your best, try to win and have fun doing it. That was the recipe that provided me with this wonderful experience I was fortunate to have when I was 15.
And it was not just me that remembers this team in this way. In the past year I have had conversations with three of my teammates from the Damariscotta Lions and each mentioned this team and how much fun they had. Yes my memory may not be what it used to, but four people who remember an experience as fun, awesome and great, have to be remembering it correctly.
Thank you to Dana Bond and Tom Burnham for dedicating their time and love of the game to all of us.
Inspiration comes from who we see and what we experience every day.
by Jonathan Hilton
The more I look for topics to write about and expound upon, the more my writing process comes clearly into my mind. I write best when I have someone specifically in mind to write about, because it is like I am explaining my thoughts or emotions to them, or that I am giving them advice. Often I know the advice would never be received directly, so I just give it on the pages of my writing.
Since these people of inspiration are all around me, they may not even know that I have been inspired by them. I can look at almost every one of the approximately 200 articles I have written on this website and remember clearly the lesson or situation that prompted the thoughts or feelings that caused me to put it to paper. This clearly shows me that people do not recognize the impact that they have on others just by living life as an example.
As we approach the new year of 2013 I am endeavoring to dig deeper into those relationships that I have had in the past to wring out the valuable experiences that I have been fortunate to experience in my lifetime. That means that if you have ever met me than you will probably be the motivation for some piece of writing that I have done in the past or I will do over the next year or two.
All things create stories in your mind, all you have to do is tell them.
I have never mentioned a name or directed a thought directly at someone because my intention is not to publicize anyone’s short comings or problems. I simply have had experiences with people in my life that have taught me lessons from their positive actions or from their negative behavior. Each situation has value, it is just much more fun to remember the positive, and often more valuable to recall the negative behavior some have displayed.
What this means as we head into a new year is that I am going to be writing and publishing a lot of material over the next year and when you read it, you just might see something of yourself in that writing. I am grateful in advance for all of the experiences and looking forward to sharing them in the future. It is definitely true that there is inspiration all around us and all we have to do is look for it, to find it.
I am planning on continually publishing articles about inspiration, but I am also going to be sharing short stories from all aspects of my youth, because they were great and they helped make me what I am today. I can not wait to get started.
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Smile, Inspire, Be Grateful. Looking forward to 2013
One of the things I like the least in life are mean people. Mean people exist and thrive on crapping on the attitude, accomplishments, interests or well being of someone else, with the sole purpose of making themselves feel more powerful or to increase their own self-esteem. In a word these people are toxic and need to be avoided at all costs. They can leave you feeling worn out, tired, depleted and negative about everything but most importantly about yourself. It seems that they spend all day thinking about how to be mean to people.
Now I understand that most acts that can be considered mean come from people who need to make themselves feel better about whatever is happening in their lives and because they feel a lack of power, self-esteem or everyday ordinary goodness in their own lives. This makes them feel the need to treat others poorly. What bothers me is that it takes very little effort to NOT be mean, and perhaps some of the inadequacies they see in themselves would be alleviated if they just tried to be less judgmental and inconsiderate once in awhile.
People’s actions may be done without the intention of being mean to others, but when you gossip, put others down, ridicule, judge or make fun of someone else, you are stepping into the dark side of mean. So often in our social media society do people make fun of others, it has become an accepted form of expression. Look no further than Youtube. You can look at almost any video on there and if you bother to read the comments left, there is always someone who has gone out of their way to leave a not so positive comment, often using foul language and almost always to put down the content of the video or the creator. I often wonder how bad their lives must be to spend their time to be so negative. It is really unnecessary, if you don’t like something you see, why don’t people just not watch it? I guess that to do that would rob them of an opportunity to be a jerk, and being a jerk and getting noticed is better than not getting noticed at all. On Facebook, people go to all kinds of lengths to make negative pages about people, for the sole purpose of hurting them. There are numerous cases of cyber-bullying that have even led to suicide. Why? I just don’t seem to be able to grasp the concept of being that hurtful to someone else.
It has become the right of everyone to be negative about everyone who is a celebrity. We all seem to have a licence to judge them and their situation simply because they are well known. In reality, we know nothing about the issues facing these people and the facts about their circumstances. It all comes from jealousy, we as a society, build people up and seem to relish in tearing them down. Charlie Sheen is a great example. Does he have issues? Yeah, he does. I don’t think that I know enough about him as a person to make a judgement about whether or not he is an addict or mentally unstable. I have never met him and I don’t know any more about his character or values than I do about someone who cleans windows for a living. Most people don’t. That hasn’t stopped our society from judging him and ridiculing his decisions like we are so much better a person than him. Really we know nothing and a train wreck, real or imagined makes people feel good, because it’s not their train wreck. Just say the name Snookie and people will immediately let you know their judgments about this person. I don’t know why people like to judge her so much, but she has gotten rich and famous because of it. I personally don’t know Snookie and how she chooses to live her life is her business and that of MTV. I think people criticize her because they see a part of themselves in her that they just don’t like.
In life there are going to be people we deal with that we may not like or appreciate. It happens, people are different and not everyone is going to get along. But does that give us a license to be mean to them? It takes little effort to be courteous and accepting. If people put in as much effort into being kind and accepting as they did into being mean and judgmental the world would be a much better place.
Here are a few ideas for those of us working on living a positive lifestyle and Stop Being Mean:
Most mean people have a sarcastic edge….arm yourself with a few funny one-liners that you can use when faced with a negative person.
Don’t take what a mean person says personally…it is their problem, definitely not yours!
If you have a friend that has a mean streak and tends to say things that hurt you or others, try saying, “Ouch” out loud and never allow yourself to get sucked into the behavior. Always know it is okay to not continue the friendship.
Don’t go running away scared from a mean person, walk away with a stronger sense of yourself, knowing that you made a good decision not to get sucked into the negativity!
The ultimate victory for us is not to fight back, get even, be vindicated, nor ever to bring the Mean Person to justice. The ultimate victory is to render this person irrelevant.
Some helpful hints on how NOT to be mean:
Before doing anything quickly ask yourself: “Will this thought/action/comment make the world a better place for me, or anyone else?” If not – don’t do it and save yourself the repercussions. There’s no point expending effort in making yourself or others unhappy. Ever.
Tell yourself constantly that you’re a nice person so that your mind begins to accept that you are. Change your behavior accordingly to fit these new standards. Thinking you’re one of the “good people” instead of a “bad person” can really make a difference to how you act. Your mind will react positively.
Resist judging people if they are not nice to you. You shouldn’t judge people anyway. There is always someone nice inside everybody, even those whose insecurity causes them to be mean to you.
Like all habits, this one will be hard to stop. With perseverance, however, your defensive meanness will change.
Smile. A smile will let people know that you are pleasant and inviting. If you smile at someone, look them in the eye.
Ask people how they are doing. Take the time to ask someone how things are going in their lives, without being nosy or intrusive. If they seem resistant to talking, just let them know that you’re always around to talk to, and that you want them to be alright.
Be a good listener. Listen when other people are talking to you.
Be courteous, patient, observant, and considerate. And be positive. Don’t be negative or critical. Keep looking for the positive in any given situation.
Be humble. The key to being nice is remembering that you are not “better” than someone else. You’re an individual, but everybody has their struggles, and being nice to one another makes life better for everyone.
Be sincere. Be nice because you want to look back on your life and know that you were a nice person, no matter what.
Don’t lie. You will go on to do good things if you refrain from lying.
Smile, Inspire, Be Grateful. Looking forward to 2013
New Year’s Tips That May Cause Miracles
Lucky [20]thirteen
