Inside all of us, there is a constant running dialogue of thought. This thought stream is going on all the time, and we never take a break.   In meditation or just moments of conscious awareness, you can pull back and notice all of these thoughts happening and how they affect you.  Left unchecked, there is no filter, and thoughts can positively and negatively run all over the place.  Each thought that we choose to engage with will dictate feelings felt, spoken words, and action.  It is important to listen to this talk and see where your thoughts are leading you, and then you can consciously pick and choose the thoughts you want to act upon.  The positive and negative experiences in your life are largely under your control by the thoughts you choose to engage with and those you let pass you by. Choose well!

How to Let it Slide

Letting thoughts slide by us is a skill our society doesn’t teach.  When you are conscious of the thoughts being created by you, you can look at each one and determine if it is one to accept, interact with, or investigate further. Or should you just let it slide by and move into the ether of forgetfulness?  The use of simple questions will help you determine how to treat your thoughts.  Where does that come from? Who does this thought belong to? Is it helpful?  Is this good for me or anyone else? 

Ask these questions about all the thoughts you entertain and hear the answers.  Your initial instinct about these things is usually going to be the right one.  Thoughts come from society, people we have contact with, the media, our education, our life experience, basically all things we have experienced in some way have led to the thoughts in our minds.  Where you choose to put your attention determines the emotional tenor of your life. If you are continually unhappy: Look at your thoughts.  If you are happy all the time: Look at your thoughts.

Three thoughts to Avoid

Moving beyond the continual thoughts and move into a more positive existence is to notice and eliminate these three types of thoughts. Notice when you use them and how they affect your general mood.

1. The need for control- Rather than allowing things to be as they are, you constantly think everything needs your personal approval and guidance to work out how you want.   Trying to control outcomes is building an attachment to one particular outcome. That means that suffering will result if things work out any other way, even if that other way was better than you could have imagined.  Let go of the need to control everything and focus on reacting as your best, highest self to everything.
2. The need for approval– One of my weaknesses in life is always worrying about what others thought of me.  I have found that first, they don’t think of me very often, and second, the thoughts of others only affect you as much as you let them. When you spend your time doing things you imagine others will approve of, you are not living from your true self.  You are living from a lie created by other people. You more than likely don’t have your best interest at heart.  Notice yourself thinking about how another will react, then do what you know is right, regardless of these imagined thoughts in someone else’s head. You will be living and be acting from your true self.
3. The need to judge-Thousands of years of evolution and instinct are wrapped up in our thoughts. In years past, our ability to size up a person or a situation was a life or death decision.  Now our mind is thrust into a situation where we allow judgment to define all people we meet. Too tall, too loud, wrong religion, too young, too old, or any other factor a person can use to categorize and usually with negative connotations.  Judgment is the opposite of acceptance. To be accepted, you have to accept others as they are. See these thoughts forming in your head, and in most cases, it is the healthy, kind thing to let them slide on by.  If you run into a knife-wielding maniac, it is good judgment to avoid him. But it is not good judgment to treat everyone like a knife-wielding maniac.  Don’t let your self-talk go crazy.  Recognize the need to judge for what it is.

Thinking well and being aware of thoughts can bring positive things to your life if you know what is happening and listen to the thoughts you say to yourself. Never accept thoughts that are degrading to you or put you down in any way. Only accept thoughts that you would find acceptable to say to another person.  Often we are far harsher with ourselves than we would ever be speaking to someone else.  This is a vital part of learning to care about yourself and appreciate all of the good things you bring to the world. Until you appreciate them, it will be hard for others to see them as well.

In fact, you cannot have a positive, exciting life and a negative mind.
~ Joyce Meyer

Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will.
~ Zig Ziglar

If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, you never will change the outcome.
~ Michael Jordan

A bad attitude is the worst thing that can happen to a group of people. It’s infectious.
~ Roger Allan Raby

The only disability in life is a bad attitude.
~ Scott Hamilton

The only people who find what they are looking for in life are the fault finders.
~ Foster’s Law