“You make mistakes. Mistakes don’t make you.” Maxwell Maltz

On the surface, make more mistakes may seem like the worst advice you have ever gotten. But one of the most effective learning tools we are given is trial and error. Yet, we have been raised and nurtured to fear mistakes. They are looked on as being weak, unintelligent, or revealing a character flaw of some kind. In reality, mistakes are a valuable part of the learning process. It is not the mistakes that deter us from success but rather our reaction to them, which stunts our progress and causes people to develop negative feelings about themselves and their abilities.  I encourage you to readjust your thoughts regarding the errors you make. They are powerful learning tools. Embrace them.

Why So Negative?

Our society has seemed to develop a perfection mentality.  Parents see their children as a representation of them, and I guess they are, but each person has to be allowed to develop into their own person.  Some are put under the pressure of perfection from the moment they are born, signed up for special programs, competitive daycare to “give them an edge,” and then all of their accomplishments are viewed as resume builders rather than just childhood. There is nothing wrong with looking to the future, but when you discourage mistakes because they may look bad on the surface, you are putting fear behind the behavior. A kid will learn to play it safe and keep in the area he is naturally good at rather than extend himself into new territories.

Each time we extend and learn, we find out valuable information. We learn what doesn’t work to take that information and apply it to the next opportunity we are presented with. That is the recipe for success; I know in my experience there was little support for mistakes, just judgment, and labels. You are “good” at this and “bad” at that. Really I think kids can do much more than we give them credit for if we allow them to go through their own process of mistakes and, rather than protect them from making them, support them and guide them through the learning process.  What worked? What didn’t? What can you do differently? You are doing well in your learning. Try again!!

Trying Again, and Again

All of our missteps provide us with the opportunity to learn how to step better.  Take a look at your life and the things you are proficient at now. Were you always great at it? The odds are you were not and had to take a special interest and develop your skills. It could be drawing, painting, writing, basketball, golf, fitness, relationships, parenting, or any other activity in life you can imagine. You are going to make mistakes because you have ideas, and you are an action taker. Sometimes our ideas are not quite right. The skill to develop is not avoiding mistakes but the ability to readjust your tack and try again without losing your motivation or enthusiasm for the thing you are pursuing.

It is natural to want to be right the first time. There are some things where success will come easy. Enjoy them and find ways to push yourself in those areas as well. But there will be many others you will have to learn before becoming proficient in them or even passable at performance.  It can be difficult to have a fixed mindset, believing you are given some talents and others we can’t develop. The growth mindset will allow you to realize you are not born talented in every area. Some of them you have to work at.  Follow your interests because that is your intuition pushing you into the areas you are supposed to go. Go there, even if it is hard at first. Keep at it, work, try, fail, try again and again if necessary. That is life, and that is learning, and greatness will become your calling card.

What Is Greatness?

We are each great in our own way, but to accomplish greatness in the things you pursue is really going to be developed to pursue what you are chasing. To be a great writer, you have to write all the time. If you want to look at life more positively, learn to look at life from all perspectives.  don’t limit yourself

in what you can accomplish, stretch yourself in activities and goals you are chasing.

I have known many people who have greatness within themselves, but they don’t see it, and in that blind spot, they don’t have enough confidence to pursue it and bring that talent to the world.  Because they feel truly great, whatever they do today should produce immediate results and rewards.  That is not the way it works, and greatness is a craft with no one recipe. Sometimes it does come quite easily, sometimes the journey is much longer, and often the longer road is more valuable and insightful. Enjoying whatever path you choose to walk is one of the keys to life. Do you enjoy your choice?

Sticking to It

Holding on to what resonates within when those without don’t support or appreciate it is one of the most difficult things you can do. We are all seeking validation of our contribution to the world. Some will see this easily, and others less so. Only you can decide for yourself what your learning curve and level of self-acceptance are going to be.  Whoever you are and whatever path you are choosing to walk, and the goal you are trying to accomplish. Keep seeking accomplishment and understand that there will be some moments of disappointment and mistakes will be made.  Mistakes are not an indictment of your talent but a calling card of your journey toward accomplishment. Learn from them, try again, and stick to it.

“Mistakes have the power to turn you into something better than you were before.” Anonymous

“Remember that life’s greatest lessons are usually learned at the worst times and from the worst mistakes.” Anonymous

“Don’t mention a person’s past mistakes when they are trying to change. That’s like throwing rocks at them while they are struggling to climb a mountain.” Anonymous

 “Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.” Oscar Wilde