Tag Archives: life lessons

22

Time To Rise

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Are You Ready To Rise?

For a long time, I believed that if you created a graph of the activity and thought a person experienced in their life, it would inevitably have a wide variety of points. There would be big moments where you shared your best, and of course, the predictable low moments where tragedy and disappointment visited a life. Between the highs and lows are the steady moments of life that make up most of our experiences. We can’t fear the low moments because they lead to the most significant personal growth. I can look at my life and plot the points of success, failure, satisfaction, fun, contentment, anger, hatred, and love. My experience provides a virtual rise and fall of personal accomplishment and fear. But where they fall on my chart is based on my own beliefs. The events of my life generally have neutral except for the value I assigned to them. I decided what was “good” and what was “bad” and reacted as such. Was I lost or just plain wrong? Looking at the events of falling in love, graduating from college, getting that job, and accomplishing that goal, along with everything else that I viewed as a positive, represented positive growth. While their corresponding low points represent every failure, loss of love, job change, unfulfilled dream, and damage suffered the opportunities I have had for growth. I thought you could never have a high without a low. Was I right, or can we all rise at this moment and become the best version of ourselves today?

I was Wrong

As I look at my life, I realize that I have been plotting things all wrong.     Each of my experiences is not meant to be judged as good or bad and then charted to riaing upsignify my advancement toward happiness. Each experience was given to me to help me learn a lesson that I needed to know. Either I will master the task and move forward to accept new teaching.   Or perhaps if the experience isn’t acquired, the lesson will continually be presented until I finally get a clue and learn what I need to know.

That realization is powerful, although I don’t like to have “bad” things happen to me because that experience is not great fun at the moment. The momentum and direction a challenging experience gives you can be the same push you need to become something you always dreamed you could be.

So charting your life through highs and lows is merely adding our perceptions of things into your experience. Nothing is inherently good or bad unless we believe them to be so. A more accurate chart would be a straight line that continually moves upward to a fuller development as a human being.

Finding your Gift

I believe that we are all born with a gift that is unique to us, and that gift is the the-meaning-of-life-is-to-find-your-gift-pablo-picassothing that makes us happy. Often throughout life, that gift is forgotten due to the conditioning that society, our peers, families, and the educational system provide us with incomplete information designed to make us forget who we are.

People are encouraged to fit in and excel in the acceptance of someone else’s ideas. Our educational system gives out Kudos for being a properly trained individual. It seems like avoidance of creative thinking is all that concerns most people. Individuals become docile, accepting sheep who devour all of the provided fodder, and falling in line will bring reward. Think outside the expectations, and you will have a significant problem.

To find the unique gift, you must overcome this conditioning and realize that you are a great human soul with unlimited potential. A fact that is not debatable, and what is up for discussion, is how you use that gift.

Rising

So as you move through life and experiences come your way, remember that each moment comes to help you overcome the narrow-minded conditioning of life and remind you what your natural talent is.

You are learning not to label these experiences as either good or bad and accept them as things happening right now. Some lessons are inherently more pleasant than others, but all experiences have value. It is often difficult to see the value of the forest when you are lost amongst the trees.

Remember that no matter what stage of your life you are in, the graph does not fluctuate wildly, up and down, depending on experiences. That would give you seasickness or whiplash. Your chart always moves in a continually upward direction, moving you closer to your true self and unique talent.   It may level off as you stop searching or get lost, but it will never go down, just as your chronological age will never go backward. Your identity will continually climb.

When you are ready to recognize your talent, you will see that you have been and continually are rising all the time.

“You decide how high you rise in life. Nobody can stop you but you.”

“Never let the fear of falling stop you from rising to your highest potential. Fear is just a thought.” 

“Falling is a part of life; we all fall. It’s getting up every time that makes you a legend.”

“In all situations, you dictate the meaning for you. You decide if it builds you or breaks you. No person can ask for more power than that.”

 

22

Some Life Lessons Learned

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What Life Lessons have YOU learned Recently?

life lessonsOne of the great things about life is that no matter what you are doing, there is always an opportunity to learn new things and grow. I am very fortunate because life has been intent on teaching me many things over the past ten years or so.

I was fortunate to develop a questioning of myself and the world, which allows me to look at situations from a different perspective than I did earlier in life. These are the three life lessons my experience has seen clear to teach me to provide me with a little recent wisdom.

The proof is In the Practice of life lessons.

No matter what your philosophy of life is, it is nothing more than theory until it is put into practice. When I took advanced math classes in high school, the question was life lessonsalways raised, “This is all great, but when will I ever use it in real life?”

A personal philosophy is similar to this. You can think you know how to treat people and act, but until you are put into several successive situations and remember to follow what you believe, it is merely a nice thought. This has been my fortune lately to be continually placed into situations where my decisions reflect my beliefs.

Sometimes I am fortunate enough to be perfect in action and words. But there are more times when I have moments of failure and am fortunate enough to evaluate what I have done wrong so that I can hopefully do better the next time.

I have been trying to be a good person and do the right things and having the opportunity to practice that every day is a real blessing. Life lessons are all like that. How have you been doing with honesty, caring, and treating others with the respect and kindness they deserve? You will know if you need to work on this or not.

Life Lessons Learned by Avoiding Multitasking

Today it seems like people take a lot of pride in being able to multitask well. That is to Single purpurea flower from above (Páty / Hungary) [NIKON D7000].work on several things at once. It can appear a fantastic thing to watch. Yet, for me, it doesn’t work well. I get so many balls in the air that I can never pay close attention to anyone of them.

That means that although they all get done oftentimes after a task, I feel like I could have done it better. This is due to the distraction of doing a lot of things at once. We can only focus on one thing at a time, and multitasking is not doing several things at once but quickly shifting our focus from one thing to another. Each time we do, there is a momentary attentional blink that occurs. At this moment, we lose all focus. This moment becomes longer as we tire throughout the day.

The optimal method for me would be to do one task until it is completed and then move on to the next. When I can focus my energy in this manner, I am most effective in creating success. When the focus gets lost, I try to do everything at once so that projects slip off the rails and do not get my full attention. Focus on the one thing that needs to be completed is the way to go for me. I am constantly challenged to add more to the list, but it is impossible.

Energy Follows Intent

Lastly, I have learned recently that energy follows intent. When You set your mind up on something, you add energy to it. Whatever you add energy to is going to multiply. life lessonsThis can work both positively and negatively. Focus on what you are lacking, and more lack will follow. Focus your thoughts on what you are grateful for, and more of that will also show up in your life.

If you set your intent to find fault and problems with people, that will be exactly what you find all around you. Your thoughts will inevitably be followed by the words and the actions that support those things. In effect, what you believe you will see.

The same is true for the positives in life. If you have a high degree of intent to see the good in people, get the best out of them, and give the best yourself, then that is what you will do. The thought will lead to the words that will lead to the actions that make your beliefs come true.

I have learned a lot in my life, but these are three things I have learned recently, and I expect that tomorrow I will learn a lot more.
There are new life lessons to learn for all of us that will allow us to become the best versions of ourselves.

“In this life, when you deny someone an apology, you will remember it at times you beg forgiveness. “

“Short cuts make long delays.”

“No matter how hard you kick, no matter how high you get, you can’t go all the way around.”

“But one of the big lessons I have learned from my journey is you can’t please everyone, so don’t try.”

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22

Quiet Spaces for Rejuvenation

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As a younger person,  I often got impatient with what life brought. Hurry up! Let us get to the next stage already. Being impatient is one of the weaknesses and follies of youth. There are patterns in life, and each has its purpose. As a young person, I didn’t look for them. Life presents many challenging circumstances, thrills, accomplishments, and disappointments. Breathing space is defined as a temporary interval of quiet or lack of activity, a time when life gives you a space to look around and take a breath or two. There is a lull period after any big moment, positive or negative,  where a person needs a chance to gather themselves before moving toward the next goal, adventure, or challenge. It is a natural time to reflect, evaluate, and adjust to your life. Learn to value the lulls.

Lack of Action time

Unfortunately, the period of breathing space is not appreciated or valued particularly highly in our society, and it is looked at as wasted time or an unwanted time of emptiness. We work to fill all of our moments with something. Games, TV, movies, or music in the background all engage our minds and stop us from thinking. We are afraid of the quiet because of what we might learn, feel, or remember. These things might lead to change, but they will also lead to a greater appreciation for the lesson you just learned and how to apply it to the life you have in front of you.

Reflection is one of the most valuable things that I have taken from the space designed to catch your breath in my life. One of the best times happened when I had a chance to relax and reflect on what I had just experienced. Whenever there is an ending, take time to reflect on the experience. It may be only for a moment, or it may be longer, but we should use the time to evaluate the situation you have just gone through and process it appropriately. Recognize when you were wrong and just as important when you were wronged by someone else. Learn from what happened and realize the hard lessons a seemingly friendly person with poor intentions can cause.

How to Process

Processing the past can be difficult. It is always hard to get through the painful feelings to see the value of the experience. However, until this point, each occasion I have had has presented me with a value of some sort. Not all experiences are pleasant and warm, but that is not what life promises. Everything we see, hear, and do is design to allow us to learn something. If the same thing keeps coming to us, then there is something that we haven’t learned and need to face again. Like a student needs to pass Algebra 1  before moving on to more complex math. We need to retain specific life lessons before we move on to something else.

So take a moment and list the positive and negative things you have faced in this particular experience. What is the value? Sometimes the value isn’t known until you get down the line a bit from what just happened. Connecting the dots is easy to do. Looking back, those dots reveal the value of a situation. Even the most challenging circumstances teach you lessons. Probably precious ones. Process all things and learn what you can, and take it forward.

Cherish Quiet Moments

Reflection is a time that I have learned to cherish. To look at even bad situations that are not enjoyable to find the lesson. It has always been there, and if you don’t learn it now, it may just come up again later. Before long, you will be on to the next adventure of life, and there won’t be time to look back appropriately and find the value. When the lulls present themselves to you, take advantage and enjoy the moment. Seek the motive, understand

There is a lesson to learn about relationships, jobs, trips, the climb, the project, the graduation, the birth, the death …………  There are the answers you are seeking in a moment of quiet. They are waiting in the ripples of a lake, underneath the rocks of a river, or in the quiet moment. Take time and look for them. They provide beauty to all of life most people miss because they are too busy avoiding thought to look inside the lull and understand the message that is living there.

Life is full of patterns, of “highs” and “lows” that are only different moments of mental intensity that allow for learning or understanding. Many live their lives with questions and never take the time to seek the answers. Experience makes a deal with us that there is always a reason behind it. In reflection and contemplation, we will find it if you can recognize the lull and appreciate the silence and thought that it provides.

“Solitude is very different from a ‘time-out’ from our busy lives. Solitude is the very ground from which community grows. Whenever we pray alone, study, read, write, or simply spend quiet time away from the places where we interact with each other directly, we are potentially opened for a deeper intimacy with each other.” -Henri Nouwen

“We need quiet time to examine our lives openly, and honestly – spending quiet time alone gives your mind an opportunity to renew itself and create order.”- Susan L. Taylor

“It’s important to have quiet time and isolation.”- John Burnside

 

22

A Challenging Game

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The Hard Game of Life

Life is a challenging game, sometimes. No matter what you do or how you try to find the gentler 8235367099_8230f69c0cside of life, the easier the hard times seem to seek you out. When I look at people in their late teens and early twenties today, I have a hard time not telling them to be careful. There are some dark times in every life. Don’t worry too much, though, because they will bring you a lesson that will help you learn a valuable lesson. DO NOT BE AFRAID!

Look for the tough times that are inevitably going to come. But you know the warning is going to go unheeded. These words of caution are summarily dismissed as the rants of someone too old to understand the world today.   Yet, I know that that conversation will be quite different in twenty years.   Some of those “hard times” will give you your greatest gifts and allow you to stretch to lengths that you would have never reached without them.

If Experiences Didn’t Hurt, You Wouldn’t Pay Attention.

Every day, the experiences we have are not meant to be either easy or hard. Enjoyable or unpleasant. They are simply experiences that we apply our labels to based on our 304291_403371469749477_15828334_nexpectations of life and our limited knowledge of everything.

It is challenging to address hard things that way because if they are unpleasant or not desired, how can you not dislike that moment? If you had a broken arm or found out that you had cancer or any other experience that is on the negative side, who wouldn’t wish that away. Yet, our natural character and strength are revealed in these moments of despair and testing. Your strength will be tested, and your power revealed.

Personally, my dark times were not welcome, and I blamed everyone for the fact that things were taken from me for a long time. There was a lot of time wasted because, in the end, those experiences I detested and wanted to avoid allowed me to become more than I ever dreamed I could be. There is a well of kindness in your soul that needs to be released to do good, and sometimes the hard times provide the method.

Life doesn’t have to be challenging, but the lessons that are harder to learn to provide the whetted stone on which our talents are sharpened to their most helpful existence. You know in a more meaningful way than you ever have before. You may find hidden talents that would have never risen to the surface without the painful and necessary letting go of the past, who no longer carry the ideas and thoughts that now embody your personal experience.

One Constant in life is, It Goes On.

The everyday experiences of our existence are only opportunities for learning everything, from our way of dealing with people to accepting how we feel about and view ourselves. I look at those young people who dream of a comfortable life, and I understand why they think that way. It would be nice to sail calm seas for life. But that is not the way for any human being. Challenges are coming your way and to expect you can avoid them is to become delusional. They will be here waiting for you.

Yet to be tested and to find that you pass and that you are made of sterner stuff than you ever would have imagined is a priceless lesson. Don’t fear the hard times. Accept them as the learning experiences they are, and do what all successful people do, keep on moving forward with the lessons you have so honestly earned. Lay claim to your power and don’t give it away to people who don’t care about you or only care about themselves.

It seems that life needs to have moments of difficulty for us to examine our souls’ contents and value our actions. Things that are difficult to endure allow you to appreciate the little things in life that you have forgotten to pay attention to.

You are a wonderful human soul with unlimited possibilities, and the fences around your thought only limit the greatness you can achieve.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7a0LUuQCo8

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22

They Make Life Interesting

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There is something about a baby that brings out the emotions in everyone. Some get downright giddy and gushy about the overall cuteness of a newborn. They are tiny and helpless and seem to be a literal bundle of joy. Most people like seeing and being around babies because it brings them joy. Some do not. They shy away, make sarcastic comments, at least to themselves, and try to move on with their lives.  The difference between these two reactions makes me look at my feelings when faced with the prospect of interacting with a newborn.  I am honestly in the middle of these two reactions, but I am more concerned with understanding what is ahead of any child as they start on the journey of life.  Some are going to be fantastic, and that is exciting, but life is not all about sunshine and rainbows, and there are going to be things that are unpleasant, challenging, and downright painful in the future of even the cutest baby.  So I look at any life to understand the almost necessary hardships and challenges that are ahead.

But There Will Be Sunshine And Rainbows

On the positive side, there will be sunshine and rainbows to experience in any life.  All people will have enjoyable times with you and make you feel happy, excited, powerful, strong, loved, understood, accessible, and many more positives.  These can happen every day, and I wish everyone more of these things than their opposites.  With youth comes a lack of understanding that all items are changing, and nothing will last forever.  I know my appreciation for something of this tenor is far greater now with the understanding that times in your life are never going to come back again.  The person I was and my experiences as a younger person only live in memories.  I have been fortunate to have great victories, creations, joys, kindness, and adventure.

 

Your perspective on things and attitude about them is the most important factor a person will develop, determining how they will enjoy life.  One person can look at something and only see the wrong things, and another looks at the same thing and sees what is right.  Being able to see the good and appreciate it will make life much more enjoyable. But as I look into the face of a newborn baby, I know much of choice in this area will be made by the programming they receive over the early part of life.  What tools will they get from life? How will experience mold them? How many hard lessons will be left for adulthood and experience to drive home in the most potent way?  There are many great things in every life, but a person has to grasp ahold of them and enjoy them.

Dark Clouds and Pitfalls

All people who think at all realize there will be things in life that are not so pleasant. There are times when we will all suffer. There will be losses, disappointments, rejection, failure, unfair treatment, and bad choices, which will color your life differently.  When I see an innocent child, I have a small amount of pity for them because they have no idea what is coming. Like a tidal wave rolling through the ocean, you can’t see it right now, but inevitably it will bring destruction to a shore somewhere.  There are waves in the future.

I have seen my share of these, and they shape your thoughts, reactions, and view of the world.  The fear of this suffering can stop you from growing and cause you to play a small, safe game, and they never push to achieve anything inside their thoughts.  Some will use their difficulties to spring into a more fantastic version of themselves.  Which will this child be?  Every day, every person you encounter in the world is making this decision and living it out.  What have your difficult experiences done to you? I have had experiences that have caused me to suffer.  All were my doing, and their effect on me was self-induced.  After all the pain life can give you, I have found that there is a chance to become a deeper, more understanding, and better person.  I envy people who come to these realizations without the experience of broken things to teach them.  Each dark cloud that passed my way and every pitfall I was trapped by has taught me something. I am hoping I have learned the proper lessons.

Clean Slates and Hopes

A friend told me that looking at a child and looking in their eyes is like seeing a clean slate with the hope that all the good things in life are in front of them.  Children are always learning, and we should all maintain that aspect of childhood because we never stop being taught by experience. The blank slate of a child doesn’t last long as they are taught the morals, expectations, and fears of their parents, relatives, institutions, and society in general.  All of these factors weave their way into a person’s mind and influence how they think and what role they should play to fit into society and the world in general.  They may be buried under a pile of expectations and painful experiences of disappointment in life.  Has everything been handed to them in life? Or have they had to work for what they want?

Each slate will quickly be covered with life’s experiences, lessons, and thoughts and how they can be applied to other people in life. Each child will start to make their own decisions and develop an attitude. Some will make the world better through their light and laugh, and others will bring darkness to the world, which is the hard truth. Most people will do both at different points in their lives. Based on the experiences they are having at the time.  Without an opportunity to process and evaluate experiences positively, it is hard for someone to learn valuable lessons and not let the suffering harm them permanently. Each story of life is unique, and there are no guarantees for any child about what the future holds. And that knowledge is in my mind when I look into the eyes of a child, and it is my fear for them that rises to the surface.

But that Is Life

Regardless of my fears and feelings about life, it is still the game we are in, and we have no choice but to play it.  It is a game that can’t be “won.” It can only be processed and played out to its conclusion. So many of our experiences are directly in our control, and we have nobody to blame but ourselves for the outcome. It comes down to a simple choice, and all people have to make it for themselves.  Be responsible and proactive about your options or be reactive and blame everyone and everything else for where you are.  Wherever you choose to focus will determine the level of joy you experience and how you play your game.

Life is a package deal that will bring you a pretty equal measure of sunny days and those filled with rain. It is the way you approach each which makes you who you are.  It will challenge you, push you, and grow because when we are young children, it has a potential for greatness within us, and if we aren’t moving ourselves toward it, life will nudge us in that direction.  Those nudges can hurt.  So when you observe any person today, as you walk down the street or drive past them in a car, or sit near them at a local coffee shop, recognize the young child in them, with a blank slate that has been written on with the chalk of their life experiences.  Understand they are processing their challenges and pain.  I believe we are all doing the best we can.  In the end, I have hope for every person; it will all turn out OK in the future.  What is your story going to be?

So should you find yourself face to face with a newborn on this day, think to yourself of the challenges that will inevitably face this young innocent. Then remember that your journey has been the same and that you are doing the best you can in your journey.  Wish the child and yourself the best on the trip through life, and remember it is a relatively short game.

“A problem is a chance for you to do your best.”– Duke Ellington
“Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today.”– Thich Nhat Hanh
“Never let your head hang down. Never give up and sit down and grieve. Find another way. And don’t pray when it rains if you don’t pray when the sun shines.”– Leroy Satchel Paige
“It is only in our darkest hours that we may discover the true strength of the brilliant light within ourselves that can never, ever, be dimmed.”– Doe Zantamata
“Learn how to be happy with what you have while you pursue all that you want.”– Jim Rohn
“I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.”– Og Mandino 

21

Favorite Things

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I have learned a few things throughout my life to assist me in navigating the sometimes stormy waters I have encountered. They aren’t tricky in concept and have proven useful when the challenges of existence come my way.  As we all know, there are always two-sided to life. It will bring you decisive, secure, happy moments, but along with each of those will come challenges that will bring you growth. These things we feel we could do without, but these things have a purpose. They allow us to grow beyond where we are right now in this moment.  “What is this trying to teach me?” 

I am sure we can all do without the suffering moments, loss, and sadness in life. The bitter provides value to the sweet.  You can try to prepare yourself to handle the tough times and persevere in life and not have the unexpected challenges of life bury you alive when they hit. You lose a job, a relationship ends, someone passes away, or even a natural disaster hits.  You will either grow from these things or be beaten by them. Don’t be beaten. Use these little weapons to help you win.

Foul Weather Gear

Foul weather gear is a term I picked up from some friends of mine many years ago. They raced a boat on the ocean for fun and took me out for a sail quite often. The experience was excellent, and I enjoyed the gentle waves on the sea on a bright, warm summer day.  It was relaxing and utterly enjoyable. Life is often like this. But……Sometimes though, the weather will turn, and it isn’t so lovely, and it rains hard, and the winds are no longer favorable but merciless, which can be quite dangerous. When the storm hits is when you break out your foul weather gear, and it will help you make it through the storm and enjoy the ride as much as possible. It is a measure we should all take in life. Life often seems like a sunny day with beautiful weather, but a storm can arise out of nowhere. It is always good to have foul weather gear at hand, just in case.

Some people are so attached to the sunny day and calm sail they will never see the joy and excitement that comes from the harsher weather heading your way — this chance to use your wits and develop your skill on the boat. You can grow as an individual and with the crew as well. There may be some danger, but life is full of uncertainty. It allows us to learn to deal with it.

Life Gives What We Need

In a perfect world, we would always find an immediate reward for good behavior and positive actions. And those who treat people poorly and make decisions that harm others would be immediately punished. But that is not how things work. If you look at the short game, life will never seem fair.  But when you look at the extended play, it appears that all things work out exactly as they should. Those who live their lives based on fear have little joy and happiness, and those who live in love are happy and enjoy life. Never expect life to give you everything you ever wanted on a silver platter, it won’t, and you will spend your time wallowing in self-pity if that is what you expect. But life will allow you the chance to grow and become the best person you can be in all areas.  Never worry about the fairness of life, worry about your ability to deal with what you face, and making positive decisions based on kindness, caring, understanding, acceptance, and love. This ability will allow you to see the long game of your life because that is all that matters.  Life gives us all an equal opportunity to become our best, so it is the ultimate level of fairness.

Practice Kindness

There are no situations where practicing kindness can hurt anything and always contributes to a better day for those you practice kindness. Sometimes we get wrapped up in our desires and feelings, and the fear of not getting what we want or feel we need can diminish our mood and make us less a lower version of ourselves. Negative thoughts make us move around in a bad mood, and we distribute negative energy to all folks we encounter that day.

Viewing the world from the scope of what we can do for others rather than what we can do for ourselves will benefit all involved, including the world in general.  Look at your expectations for the day, see what you seek for yourself, and then look for the simple things you can do to make someone else’s day a little brighter. Kindness is easy to practice because it feels good to be kind. Put other people first and treat the world with that attitude, and it will generally treat you that way too.

Build Your Body

Exercise is a choice, and participating in it regularly will bring you many benefits. It is suitable for the functioning of your body in heart, mind, and spirit daily, and that by itself is enough. Along with a sensible diet, it will help you maintain a healthier weight and feel better in overall health.  But there is also another benefit that many don’t contemplate.

When tragedy comes into your life, you will be mentally and physically able to handle things better.  Many people have their lives jump off the rails at the slightest bump of adversity.  Working out teaches you to reach deep inside yourself and know that there is a strength to do what you have to do, even if sometimes you don’t want to.  Without a consistent exercise regimen, I think that we tend to move to the soft side and become vulnerable. Whatever training and physical activity resonate with you, participate in it.  Lifting, jogging, biking, yoga, martial arts, or any other type of exercise will provide you strength inside and outside.

Find Moments of Quiet

It is in the moments of quiet that you can hear yourself. Take time to find the places in life where you can get your mind to stop making noise and listen to the natural inner guidance we all have. Experience provides us with many rules and expectations that teach us what society expects from us, but they don’t help our soul express itself in the way one needs. To follow this inner guidance, we need to quiet the mind and stop chasing the world’s expectations. Listen to the inner voice that exists in each of us.  The sound is your intuition, and it is much wiser than your thoughts will ever be.

Don’t ignore your intuition because of the thoughts you think about the fears and expectations of the world.  Find the quiet and ask simple questions and follow the answers you hear. It sounds simple, but it takes commitment because as soon as you get a response, your mind will kick back in with a million objections and doubts. What will people think? How can that work? Will we lose the respect of others?  Those we love will judge us harshly.  Nobody will understand. Soon the right answer seems like an impossible challenge.  It is much easier to maintain the status quo, but it isn’t very fulfilling. Life brings a growth experience and avoiding growth leads to atrophy and death.  Listen to your inner voice.

Meditation

Taking on meditation is a great way to calm your mind and stop the constant chatter. There are many misconceptions about the practice, it is not difficult, and it is not religious. It is a tool to work with your mind and the thoughts you have rather than be bowled over by it. It can also help you find a way to deal with your emotions more healthily.  Since we get very little guidance in our lives on how to do this, meditation has been a savior to me in making sense, accepting, and moving past the inevitable negative emotions which arise from life.

There are many different ways to meditate; to me, there is no wrong way. You will be able to find guided meditations easily. I use an app on my phone called Insight Timer, and there are many others.  They offer a chance to be conducted in a direction you need to work on, or you can use their timer with ambient sound and focus on your breathing.  Whatever method resonates with you and helps you live a healthier life is a good thing to do. Give it a try. You will only find positives.

These are a few little thoughts to make life a more enjoyable experience.  Keep your foul weather gear handy and ride out the storm. Understand life is a long game, it may seem unfair at the moment, but it all equals out in the end. As long as your alive, there is a chance for a comeback.  Kindness is always the right choice. If you are questioning whether or not understanding will work, practice compassion.  Find your moments of quiet, just for you, because you deserve it. We all need to contemplate the things which make us feel fulfilled, what steps to take next, and where our power lies. To that end, give practicing meditation a chance. It can allow you to tame the negative thoughts and produce a positive force of action in your life. Be physical, and take care of your body in some way. You only get one of them, and it will take you as far in life as you let it.

Keep these tools at your disposal, and they will help you overcome the hard times and answer the question: What is this trying to teach me?

 

20

The Message

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what messageWho hasn’t wanted to spread a valuable message to a large number of people all at once?  That is the draw of blogging and writing.  It is alluring to share advice because you hope all of your mistakes and bad experiences can help others.  It would be great to have my thoughts and ideas broadly help other people.

I am stating my message. I want to make it one that a reader might remember and might have a positive effect on them.  We can only deliver the news, and it is up to others to decide if they want to hear what we have to say. Here are three big messages from me to you!

1. You Have Greatness In You

post-4502-Motivational-Quotes-The-Greatn-j0b6Every person in the world has the seed of greatness planted inside of them when they are born.  Life spends a lot of time trying to make us forget this greatness, but it exists inside each one of us.

 If you are not feeling great right now, don’t worry because, although this power can lay dormant for years, it is never too late to develop the talent that you have and allow your light to shine on the world.

 There are countless examples of people who lived much of their lives only to find a latent talent in their later years and to not only use it but to excel at it.  All of you have this authentic power inside of you, and the talent only has to be remembered and applied.

 How do you remember?  That is where creativity comes in. Engaging in something creative seems to allow you to creep behind the veil that the years have raised to hide your talent.

 Being creative and allowing yourself to become completely involved in something, like writing, drawing, fence building, architecture, or any creative activity, will allow you to remember your authentic power and talent.  It is there, it always has been and always will be, just waiting for you to remember. You possess greatness, and I can’t wait to see how it manifests itself in the world.

2. Be Kind to Yourself

You need to be your own best friend. Treat yourself the way a loved one deserves to be treated. We spend much too much time being critical about our looks, behaviors, choices, relationships, or any other aspect of life.

Don’t spend your time berating yourself for mistakes you have made or for things you haven’t accomplished yet. The past is the past, and it can’t be changed. Learn from it, but don’t let it beat you up and take away your happiness.

There is no need to spend time worrying that life is passing you by.  Life is never passing you by. Life is just passing.  When you are young, it is often like jumping from stone to stone to cross a river, and you concentrate so much on the path you have to take to get across safely that you can’t kind to yourselfappreciate the road until you are safely on the other side and look back.

 Chastising yourself too harshly for where you are now is being mean to yourself unnecessarily.  You may be setting things in motion with your actions, that ten years from now will allow you to be a millionaire, or famous, or the inventor of a new gadget that we don’t even comprehend yet.

 If you are not happy with your relationships, change them. If you don’t like your job, as soon as you can, change it!  If you want to live somewhere else, move there.  Nothing is stopping you from doing these things but you. We are all full of reasons we can’t, should, could have, but in the end, the only thing stopping you is you.

 Be kind to yourself, you are doing the best that you can, and we all lack the vision to judge our situation correctly accurately.  Time will reveal the wisdom or folly of any decision, and that is the beauty of life.

3. Be Grateful For What You Do Have

It never ceases to amaze me the power that gratitude possesses.  We all want to achieve things and have things in our lives.  Money makes it easy to do anything we want. Yet many of us focus on the money that we don’t have and dream about that, rather than be thankful for the amount we do have that allows us to survive.

230937_368883386533410_1322779775_n There are entire philosophical movements and religions based on this premise.  I can only speak of what I have experienced and to be grateful for what you do have, seems to open the way for more of the same.  It can be health, wealth, or wisdom, whatever you want, be grateful for the amount you have, and more will come.

  Unlike a magic genie, nothing is going to happen instantaneously, you have to do it with sincerity and feel grateful for things.  There is no faking this in your mind or your heart.  It is a feeling and thought that you experience every day.

That is the quick message that I would give, but I could make it a much longer message if I had to.  I would hope the kindness and the heartfelt concern would come through, and hopefully, others will not only read this but listen to the message.

“If you put your fears and doubts behind you, you would surely discover that you too have the seeds of greatness in you.”― Edmond Mbiaka

“You will never speak to anyone more than you speak to yourself in your head, be kind to yourself. ”  

“Be kind to yourself, you are doing the best you can.” 

“Being grateful for what you have will keep you happily busy while waiting for your other heart desires.”

A message to YOU!

 

Life Lessons

Super Hilton

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Yesterday I had one of the most interesting visitors I ever experienced.  It was from my 10-year-old self and it was eye opening to remember how great that person was and even better to know that all of the great things about him

Super Hilton at a summer camp in the Maine, 1977. (back row 8th from left and right, dead middle)

are still there inside of me now 40 years later.

Today we live in a time where every moment is captured in pictures and posted on social media. It is difficult to fathom that events happened in our past which were never caught on camera and only exist today in our memories and thoughts. Over the years those thoughts get lost,  buried underneath the avalanche of experiences we have year after year. Positive and negative they work to change us.  I was a kid with hope and a kid who loved life and knew what a good person I had the potential to be. And I lived it every day.  I enjoyed people and the new experiences that every day brought with it.

Over the years those things that made us get lost,  buried underneath the avalanche of experiences we have year after year. Positive and negative they work to change us.  I was a kid with hope and a kid who loved life and knew what a good person I had the potential to be. And I lived it every day.  I enjoyed people and the new experiences that every day brought with it. At this camp, we did the usual stuff, archery, swimming, arts, and crafts, and in this case bible and Jesus stuff.

Here are a few of the lessons that he had me remember today.

Seek Your Joy

Enjoy each day………….. Or we should experience joy in each day, it is there for you. No matter what is happening there are things to be joyful about and allow yourself to embrace life.  Joy is in us all and there is an opportunity in every day to feel it through the things we do.

Occasionally, we look at the things we like to do and worry about what others think. That will rob from your joy. If you are functioning from the view of your true self, and nobody else is being harmed then don’t waste energy worrying about others judgments. It is none of your business and really of no consequence, what is the joy that you get from what you are doing. That is all that counts.

Be Yourself

Each of us is unique and that is what makes us great and identifies us as the one of a kind human beings that we are. Don’t apologize for it and don’t ask anyone else to be different than they are.  All of us have a light in us and when it shines, so do we.  Life has a tendency to cover the light with the shade of experience or the fear of not being accepted.

Let your light shine and those who appreciate it are welcome to visit and those who are negative toward it or you are unimportant and clearly, need to work on themselves. Let them do that someplace else.

Understand and Support Others

All people have their struggles and challenges. The experiences each of us have leave wounds and scars and fear of the pain they cause lead to behavior that is reactionary, mean and sometimes hurtful.  Don’t judge others too harshly because under that behavior is a light that is uniquely theirs and is probably seeking someone to recognize it, accept it and love it for the beauty that it provides.  Allow them the chance to shine when you can.  Some people are jealous of others talents and abilities. Don’t be one of these people.  There is more than enough darkness in the world and it needs light. The more people who are living up to their true selves the brighter and more exciting the world will be.

Just because you are kind doesn’t mean that you are weak. Never let other people dim your light because of jealousy, envy or because they don’t appreciate you.  Not everyone is going to like you and that is their problem, not yours.

Super Hilton

The signatures on the back of the picture. I am Super Hilton, written in cursive.

There is no doubt that as a 10-year old, I had a vivid imagination and really had a lot of confidence in what I could do in life. On the back of that picture, all of the kids in the cabin signed their names. I signed mine as “Super Hilton”. Since I just started to master writing in cursive, it was written in perfect 5th-grade cursive writing.  There was a confidence in that name I lost in life.  10 year old me has been living with me for the past 40 years and he has made many appearances, but only for a brief moment and not for nearly long enough.

It is my goal to bring more of Super Hilton into my life each and every day. Being more confident in who I am and what makes me happy. How to treat others and what behavior I accept are all the things this visit from the past reminded me.  I believe each of us has the ability to be great, and I feel sorry for all of those who have forgotten or don’t believe this about themselves.

In the words of Super Hilton, “I  am the man”.