Who Am I?

Today when I think about myself, I don’t feel different from the person I was at younger moments of my life.  Yet I know that when I look in the mirror, that person has seen some things, been quite a few miles, and hopefully gained some wisdom. I  think we all ponder what factors make us unique in a world that is constantly trying to make us as uniform as possible.

I think that it is kind of mind-boggling to think that of all of the billions and billions of people that have ever existed in the history of the earth, that there has never before been anyone who is exactly like me, and there never will be another again. The same is true for all of us, and there is something in that knowledge that forces us to take a little responsibility for our actions and the lives they create.

I am a one-of-a-kind original, as all people are, which is something powerful to think about.  But still, I want to express what makes me a unique individual.

My Power

The first thing that you have to look at is the attributes  I was born with, from my personality, which is uniquely my own,  to how I react to and interact with the world.  These actions are all mine and always have been.  I think that I have contained the same personality and been the same person since I

I was able first to be aware of life around me. Sometimes, I take things too personally, and I don’t give up on others very easily. Even when they have given up on me. I love to learn, and that is my real superpower because it allows me to continually grow and become a better person simply by using my brain.  I have always put people into two categories. One is the sponges; these are people who soak up everything in their lives and learn from them. Taking the valuable and squeezing out the things which don’t matter.  The second is rocks, hard and impenetrable. These people are so busy being right in who they are; they don’t absorb anything new and valuable. Growth is impossible. Which type of person are you?

My personality has been influenced and cajoled by the experiences that life has given me. My upbringing programmed me, and although I don’t think anyone meant me any harm, I have been spending my life unraveling the limiting beliefs I was instilled with as a child, from money issues to relationship knowledge. But in essence, the person at the core of my being is the same one who started this journey, just a more complex version.

My History

The second reason I am me is my family and our history.  Each of the people of all relationships that touched my life, from my parents, grandparents, great grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and siblings, has all left a mark and helped mold me into the person I am today. Being brought up as the second child of four was the most influential portion of my childhood. The activities we participated in as a family were the first lessons in what is important.

Whether it was the direct lessons, they taught me, like be polite or don’t steal. Or the indirect lessons that they taught by showing kindness, compassion, and caring for others, I am indebted to my family for much of what I am today and for what I will become in the future. I often recall all of my grandparents; now they are all gone, those thoughts are all that is left.  What would my grandparents think about the world as it is today, I wonder?

You will choose who you are

Thirdly, I think that your life experiences make a big impact on who you are and, even more importantly, your reactions to the things that life throws at you. The past year has been a reminder to me about the yin and yang of life, how there always seems to be a dichotomy in all things. Where great good exists, there is the potential for great bad. I know this is true because that was my life in 2018.

There are circumstances you love, wishing they would last forever, and some which aren’t so nice to experience. With each experience, pleasant or difficult, you will always have the choice of what you take from it. In fact, often stressful, painful experiences are often the most educational, motivational, and ultimately valuable moves.  How to grow, heal and forgive are often the most valuable residues of the suffering we face.

You alone are responsible for deciding if you learn something and move forward or be so devastated that you can only look backward with regret.

This is a personal choice that nobody can make for you, but one has gone a long way in defining who I am today and why I am me.

Many factors will cause us to reevaluate our lives, the death of a loved one, a serious illness, or perhaps the ending of a relationship.

That new perspective can catapult you into one of two directions, forward to accomplishment or backward in regret and despair.  Sounds harsh, but there are only two ways you can go every day in the life: you are getting better, or you are getting worse, nobody stays the same.

Who am I in my own thoughts? To quote Lady Ga Ga, I was born this way, and there is really no other way I would rather be. I have spent too much time in my life worrying about what other people think of the actions I take and how they may look to them. The only person I really need to be concerned with is myself.  I choose to base my life choices on strong, positive values like kindness, compassion, understanding, honesty, and integrity.

In the words of Carly Simon, “Nobody does it better.” I am the best me I can be, and that will have to be alright with everyone. Welcome to August 2021!! It’s a pleasure to make it this far.